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#Post#: 103617--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: Hippocrates
Date: December 22, 2025, 3:19 pm
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--- Quote from: roythebus link ---
>
> Indeed, it beggars bailiff!
>
--- End Quote ---
Which reminds me: I must trim the Bay Leaf Tree.
#Post#: 103818--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: Hippocrates
Date: December 26, 2025, 10:28 am
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HTML https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6lc92NRAOk&pp=0gcJCU0KAYcqIYzv
#Post#: 113049--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: v8offroad
Date: March 12, 2026, 2:02 pm
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During class, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asks the
students: "Students, If you were on a date, having supper with a
nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to
the bathroom? Michael?"
Michael: "Just a minute, I have to go pee."
Teacher: "That would be rude and impolite!!!
Teacher: "What about you Peter? How would you say it?"
Peter: "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom,
I'll be right back."
Teacher: "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the
word bathroom at the dinner table. And you Little Johnny, are
you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good
manners?"
Johnny: "I would say: 'Darling, may I please be excused for a
moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine,
who I hope you'll get to meet after supper. "
The teacher fainted!!
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Edit: I'd like to make it clear I didn't intentionally give this
post a Bad Spelling rating. I must have accidentally hit the
icon when scrolling, and can now find no way of withdrawing it.
#Post#: 114193--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: v8offroad
Date: March 24, 2026, 6:15 am
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The Titanic set off on its maiden voyage. The First and Second
class passengers were all well entertained with top class acts,
but the poor Third class passengers had to make do with a Third
Class magician. He had a parrot which sat on his Left shoulder
and whenever he did a magic trick, the parrot would squawk "It's
in his pocket" or "It's under his hat" etc. Well, the inevitable
happened and in the morning when the sun came up, the magician
was floating, holding onto a plank of wood. At the other end of
the plank was his parrot.
The parrot sat there, saying nothing, but eventually couldn't
contain itself and blurted "OK, I give up - What did you do with
the bloody ship?"
#Post#: 118365--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: v8offroad
Date: May 11, 2026, 4:03 pm
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A man brings his best buddy home for dinner...unannounced at
7:30 pm after work.
His wife begins screaming at him and his friend just sits and
listens.
Wife: "My hair and makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the
dishes are not done, I'm still in my pajamas and I can't be
bothered with cooking tonight! Why the hell did you bring him
home?!?"
Husband: "Because he's thinking of getting married and I
promised him a demo!"
#Post#: 126402--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: Hippocrates
Date: July 31, 2026, 9:44 am
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--- Quote from: Hippocrates link ---
>
> The amount outstanding on the PCN is £80.00, and will increase
to £160.00 on Wed, 31 Dec 2025. However, this PCN currently has
an offer, meaning you can pay at a reduced rate of £80.00. This
offer expires on Sun, 4 Jan 2026. Please pay £80.00 now.
>
--- End Quote ---
HTML https://www.ftla.uk/the-flame-pit/observation-of-hearings/msg126397/#msg126397
WHACKO.
#Post#: 128776--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: Hippocrates
Date: August 25, 2026, 6:18 am
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HTML https://youtu.be/-rWogRmKD7g
#Post#: 129446--------------------------------------------------
Re: Humour thread
DIR By: Hippocrates
Date: September 2, 2026, 5:31 pm
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Controlled Planting Zone in leafy Esher.
HTML https://cdn.imgpile.com/f/8xrU6rL_xl.webp
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