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#Post#: 222--------------------------------------------------
Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 16, 2012, 1:49 am
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[quote author=The Wise and Powerful
link=topic=80538.msg1007138#msg1007138 date=1334085727]
[center]FIVE X FIVE
EXHIBITION EVENT
HTML http://gamechanger.net/gc/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/5x5-new-285x300.jpg
Reaper - Gunzablazin - JOODOG - The Poofer - AlphaNova
VS
King_Herpes - Caskur - Flabio - Trollsbane - Strapon
Five Days, starting Monday, April 16th at 12:01AM ET
Ending Friday, April 20th at 11:59PM ET
Unlimited poasts
NO RUNINS[/center]
[hr]
[center]The General Discussion Thread for this event is:
HTML http://www.cosmicoutpost.com/index.php?topic=80385.0
HTML http://www.cosmicoutpost.com/index.php?topic=80385.0[/center]
[/quote]
Welcome Patriots -
Let the wankfest begin… Lets start with the leader of the pack
of gimps Reaper.
HTML http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqNZhQFCjCA
Reaper - Guy voted most likely to lead a group of talentless
hacks through a flame match and finger ****ing his own skull.
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/msn%20queen/BurningReaper.gif[/img]
Gunzablazin - Guy voted most likely to short change a homeless
African American Jiggaboo, with 7 hungry children.
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/msn%20queen/BurningGumzdisease.gif[/img]
JOODOG - guy most likely to punch a woman in the head when she
orders well done steak. (yes, he actually confessed that)
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/msn%20queen/burningjoo.gif[/img]
The Poofer - Guy most likely to sell Detroit real estate to
Belize refugees otherwise known as illegal aliens.
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/msn%20queen/burningpoofa.gif[/img]
AlphaNova - Guy most likely to never earn himself a skin cancer
or an STD. This no **** getting talentless hack keeps his
felines on the top floor, his son in freebie school therapy and
his wife gainfully employed in school cafeterias.
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/msn%20queen/Burningalponobody.gif[/img]
VS
King_Herpes - Caskur - Flabio - Trollsbane - Strapon <<<< the
Dream Team.
#Post#: 225--------------------------------------------------
Re: Reaper's Going Down
By: Catherine Date: April 16, 2012, 11:19 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I would like to say Gunz is a very interesting character but I
would be lying. Lying isn’t one of my strong points because the
truth is far more interesting to me and abhorrent to others. He
wants the membership to believe some bare chested broad came
onto him. I saw the fake screen shot posted. She asked if he
liked her breasts. If this was reversed, how far do you think a
guy would get sending pictures of his hidden bits asking a
woman, “hey Babe, how do you like my bait and tackle?” If you
asked the two genders what a woman thought, you’d get two
entirely different responses….
The woman would most likely say, “Are you shitting me needle
dick?” and scream sexual harassment.
A man would say, “ __________________" (insert your male answer
there).
Of course, being vain like Gunz is, he wouldn’t think to ask
himself whether or not he was being trolled. He actually thought
some attractive bare breasted woman was hitting on him…LOLOLOLOL
I present the beast VVV…
[IMG]
HTML http://i138.photobucket.com/albums/q260/caskur_2006/Dead%20Budgies/gumzuglyracist2.png[/img]
Does this guy look like a Brawl Hall champ to anyone here?
He posts pictures of bunnies at Brawl Hall for crying out loud.
He’s their current tuff guy champ. What sort of brain dead 50
something yr old dizmo posts bunny pictures at others guys? In
my sincerity, I axe ya!!
His championship was pre-arranged and Joo was denied the
figurative champ cup all the while obviously articulating an
erudite capacity far greater than Gunzablazin’s’.
Hahahaha… Just kidding… the guy is a regular Prince.
But I’m guessing you’d all like to know how it was Gunz was
beaten up, right?
Hint… a white rabbit
#Post#: 226--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 1:43 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Trollsbane link=topic=80538.msg1010793#msg1010793
date=1334600903]
Quote from: caskur on Today at 00:10:42
Lying isn’t one of my strong points because the truth is far
more interesting
Given our particular opponents, the truth is actually less
likely to be interesting, but otherwise I couldn't agree more.
Take Alf, for instance.
On one hand, so little is verifiably known about him that his
"truth" is effectively non-existent, and therefore meaningless.
Boring.
On the other hand, the self-evident "truth" of his 'net persona
is a long history of slime, bullshit, hypocrisy and spam-powered
fluff.
All of which is also notable only in that it's consistently
meaningless, and boring.
To tell the truth and nothing but the truth about Alf is
necessarily to dwell on things meaningless and boring.
I hope his teammates show up soon, if for no other reason than
it'll be far more fun to wind them up.
Alf is less than a byline in this or any other Flame event,
although he'll no doubt try to refute this fact.
That doesn't change the fundamental truth... it's up to his
teammates to bring any semblence of artistry to that side of
this match.
[/quote]
[quote author=reaper link=topic=80538.msg1010815#msg1010815
date=1334602744]
WHOA ........... WHAO............ WHOA.............WHOA
...............
There man bitch what do we have here may I ask?
Quote from: reaperTwat you can close shop on this shit now the
POA have been defeated.
Herpes had his week to find his five and came up short.
Troll that how you like but im not going to sit here for another
week playing he is in......oh hes not......yes he is bullshit.
you had your start date..end of faggot..
AH...HA.....HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Point-
1) You shit out on the mandate of the terms and try to pull a
reverse side ways fucking when the powers that be think this
shit is dead and buried.........How very brave of you..lol.
2)The match was called dead last Friday when you cowards
chickened out and refused to sign up.......
Quote from: reaperTick........tock m8.......3 hrs 56mins before
all the POA members get the retard status.
00.00 GMT.....CLOCK IS RUNNING............
Name your five..
Quote from: king herpesJust touched base with strapon(No, not
his actual base) and he says he's in if I need a fifth
Quote from: reaperDo you want the R/P geek as well?
And thats now two fucking non POA fucktards ive allowed you to
sign.
So did they herpes.............DID THEY-YOU GET YOUR SHIT
TOGETHER IN TIME?
This may happen now herpes has his team together but ONLY WHEN
THE STIPS ARE SET IN STONE.
We dont roll with this fly by night shit..
Thats just my opinion..the team may be at odds with that but ill
go with the consensus.
[/quote]
#Post#: 227--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 1:48 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=AlphaNova link=topic=80538.msg1010840#msg1010840
date=1334603782]
I'm so unimportant that your whole post is about me, correct
David?
You? You're very important. Why, the entire Ootikof board
depended on you....until you quit as an admin....and until you
couldn't figure out how to restore a backup after you're buddies
nuked the entire forum in a meltdown to never be forgotten.
And what was that meltdown over? Why, me being made a knight
there.
*snicker*
So I forced an entire forum to delete all their posts just to
get rid of me.
God, I'm good.
[/quote]
[quote author=Trollsbane link=topic=80538.msg1010921#msg1010921
date=1334609235]
Way to take a principled stand there, Weepy. Even a career
politician could hardly be expected to make such fine use of
vague bull**** or leave as many escape clauses in one sentence.
The consensus is that you're a f u c king 'tard. Go with it.
[/quote]
[quote author=Trollsbane link=topic=80538.msg1010929#msg1010929
date=1334609458]
You were the only representative from Team Gobsmacked who had
poasted at that time.
As the other clowns pile out of your car, they'll get some as
well.
Don't be a greedy bastard, Alf. The truth is, it isn't and never
was all about you.
[/quote]
[quote author=caskur link=topic=80538.msg1010993#msg1010993
date=1334614944]
HTML http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCOYCNp_K-c
[/quote]
[quote author=King_Herpes link=topic=80538.msg1011042#msg1011042
date=1334619009]
Ka-Boom! Guess who steps up in the room, The K to the I to the N
and then oh yes I'm the G, of everything STD!! ****, yeah they
call me Herpes and so you ****in' know it burns when I pee!!!
[center]*Giant gasp in the match thread, everyone steps
back.*[/center]
Alright you ****ing disloyal peasants, first we're going to blow
the ****in' boundaries off your meager little paradigms into a
thousand shards of pure nothingness! And after the shows all
****in' said and done, you'll finally ****ing understand why I
wear this royal crown over top an upside down frown.
I couldn't be happier to have been blessed with such a loyal
camp. Loyal only to those who offer quality entertainment. These
players are bursting at the seams with more flavor, originality
and character then you could ever get your greedy little mitts
on. We're going to be working tirelessly to carry a sense of
professionalism and calm back into todays CO.
We give our special thanks to the notorious cowardly duo that is
Reaper and AlphaNova for making this all possible. If your
teammates had any ****ing amount of integrity they would turn on
you within this very thread and scorn you dead like a charred
****ing ember so that you could only realize, that you are
standing directly in the way of someone who is on the verge of
something great.
Anyone who tries to detract from my current standing as this
forums revolutionary patriot will only be met by a steadfast
backhand that will leave you realigning your mandible and wiping
the blood from your lip. We will serve as the structuring spine
of this fora, from today forward by giving it the necessary
support it needs to harness the true ability of a divine
righteousness. Slowly but surely we will be destroying the
credibility of this endless sea of fakes and half assed flaming
spambabies. You will be outrightly labeled and repeatedly called
out on your feeble minded collusions and failed attempts at
bringing truth. Nothing you do, I repeat, nothing can harm this
vessel. We are True.
We possess a quality that gives you an inspiring curiosity and
then ultimately leads to fantasy. I want to emphasize on
fantasy, because that's all we're going to be seeing out of your
sorry ilk this week. Your odd ball team of self serving
obstructionists will pale in comparison. Your pathetic attempts
to flare back will be remembered as nothing more than a tragic
****ing metaphor for hubris.
My loyal team of social misfits, yes you heard it first from
Mama Cas, "The Dream Team" will be tearing the salty flesh from
your lifeless carcasses like a rabid pack of ****ing hyenas.
Trollsbane and flabio are going to hold each one of you down
while they spit venom down your ****ing throats! As strapon
pries open your helpless twig-like legs and proceeds to sodomize
your loosened ****s until they are each the diameter of a
****ing CD, with nothing but some fresh ****ing grit for lube!!
Then Caskur is going to hover over each one of your chests,
pushing out the hottest, most nastiest quiefs you could ever
imagine as I tit **** her with my rocksteady **** and proceed to
spider man they most vile smelling yellow semen into each one of
your scared little eyes!!!
Then they are going to stand you all up individually as I give
you the flame equivalent of me doing a 720, starting from my
back right hand I will **** slap you all in a clockwise
direction 7 times. Then there's nothing left to do but for me to
round house each of you off a cliff and then machine gunning
your frightened soul as you peril to your death. Where I then
launch a grenade launcher directly into your ribcage while we
all scream, "**** you, you ****ing ****s"!
[center]This match will be nothing short of a mother ****ing
blood bath!![/center]
#Post#: 228--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 2:01 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=AlphaNova link=topic=80538.msg1011049#msg1011049
date=1334619356]
How are you going to draw blood on the internet?
[/quote]
[quote author=caskur link=topic=80538.msg1011106#msg1011106
date=1334621844]
Ooo… and out comes one of those tricky questions Alpo likes to
spam-off.
With ms paint’s paint brush naturally..
[/quote]
#Post#: 229--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 2:04 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=AlphaNova link=topic=80538.msg1011158#msg1011158
date=1334624115]
Someone should tell caskur her chops aren't funny.
[/quote]
[quote author=Trollsbane link=topic=80538.msg1011272#msg1011272
date=1334634724]
What the fu ck would you know about Funny, you mongrel spawn of
a poorly written spambot and a lobotomized pin cushion?
Alf = CO's most generic and bland poaster bar none, and he
presumes to lecture anyone about humor?
Here's a challenge for you, Alf: learn how to make someone
laugh, and just maybe your opinion on whether or not anybody
else brings the lols will mean more than fuckall.
"No Yuo" isn't enough.
"Yuor teh ghey" isn't going to cut it.
"Yuo has no nose!!" isn't even close to good enough.
"Keel yuorself" is so far below any reasonable standard you
should profusely thank ThWAP for not binning that drivel as fast
as you can poast it.
You know what they call someone who offers opinion as if it were
fact when he actually has no fucking idea what he's talking
about?
Take your pick, there's more than one right answer... dumbass,
mushmellon, and bull s hiter would all be acceptable.
You can only try to irritate people with a very limited tookit,
Alf. What you do isn't entertainment, and it certainly isn't
funny.
Leave the critiquing of things you don't understand for people
who have a clue, you worthless jackwagon.
[/quote]
#Post#: 232--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 4:31 am
---------------------------------------------------------
So far the “exhibition” match has shown the readers some
fascinating talents between “the haves, and have nots.”
Team Herpes has shown to “have,” talent, flair, aptitude and
paraded their vast worldly gifts of pearl before swine.
Struggling team Reaper has two showings…Cry baby Reaper starring
himself… erm, crying and bleeding all over this board about the
unfairness of it all and good old stalwart AlphaNova taking the
odd ineffectual jab and on his nervous knees running back to his
corner as fast as his little betraying arse can take him. In a
way, they’re “haves” too. They “have” moaning, crying, tried and
true spam and a generous helping of inanity.
Meanwhile AlphaNova’s cat has spotted emo AlphaNova junior
heading up the staircase and caskur has spotted King Herpes
impressive throbbing member stuck deeply in a Murdie in another
thread.
Tsk, the man cannot be faithful to caskur in a stampede of
elephants. Why is he the King of Heartbreakers?
[quote author=AlphaNova link=topic=80538.msg1011330#msg1011330
date=1334658052]
Calm down, Dave.
You're blowing your top.
[/quote]
#Post#: 233--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 6:23 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Now Snooze Generator AlphaNova is an interesting character… just
kidding, strike that. He isn’t interesting at all unless you’re
a completely net addicted, rl company starved moron… *hi Stinky.
To quote myself from my first post..
“AlphaNova - Guy most likely to never earn himself a skin cancer
or an STD. This no pu ssy getting talent-less hack keeps his
felines on the top floor, his son in freebie school therapy and
his wife gainfully employed in school cafeterias.“
It’s Alpo’s poor cat confined to the top floor that disturbs me.
I think of my own darling fluffy girl able to come and go
through several cat doors as she pleases… running up and down
trees, walking sturdily along fence lines keeping nasty rodents
from robbing the grapevines. Running across the roof swaying her
Pepe Le Pew style tail in the breeze, trying to avoid the local
Toms… having a whale of a time and being just downright damn
cute. Much like gorgeous me really.
FFS Alpo, let your cat run free. Let it out to be,… well… be a
cat. Cat’s need to run, to climb, to bask in the morning sun… to
dig a hole in real earth to take a crap in and not some dingy
litter tray filled with paper pulp everyone forgets to clean..
To try and stalk birds and rodents and catch blowflies and
****roaches and lizards…to pick up worms and fleas and parasite
products from the local vet. *I recommend “Revolution For Cats”
btw”… and that post not only applies to Alpo but all you other
fuzzy nutted so called “animal lovers”… If you can’t have an
animal in the right circumstances and provide them with a
glorious cat active life, don’t get one at all.
Now Alpo, what is with this obsession you have with homosexuals?
Gender benders only make-up 3% (if that) of society and yet,
almost 100% of your inane spam contains references to that
subject. It’s so, so 90’s to live everyday wondering about where
everyone is dipping their wick. It’s like you’re trying to be
some new age virtual Phil Donohue. She-it…. And failing.
The other thing you should be grilled about is your net copping.
Some of us haven’t forgotten it and I certainly haven’t
forgotten it or how you hid your board from the TDT because an
invasion from them terrified you that you’d lose your little net
dossier on all the people who got the better of you….which, if
you want to be honest about it, is/was everyone. Do you think if
Rita Miller is mucking out a stall of horse manure, she’s
thinking of you? Do you think Goops, while cloud surfing, that
she might look down and see the board she left you is as dead as
your fellow feeling for other netizens?
I digress...
The last thing I’d like to know is, how much is your comic book
collection worth? I bet you’d have nightmares at the thought of
it being set on fire, yes?… Where do you keep it? In the attic
with the silverfish or safely in a bank vault?
#Post#: 234--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 17, 2012, 11:28 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=strapon link=topic=80538.msg1011408#msg1011408
date=1334683711]
I haven't read through the entirety of the legal document that
defines the rules governing this event and I'm hoping that
someone can answer my question pertaining to switching teams
while a match is underway because this seems to be a one-sided
affair and I pride myself in enjoying good sportsmanship and not
unbridled violence and this has been a blood bath so far.
So far.
So....
Far........
Upon further reflection I realize that I in fact have no desire
to switch teams as I'm aware that there are members of the other
team that are very tricky and they are probably building their
arsenal of flame material and they're probably coordinating
their attack through private messages and video chats and
carrier pigeon-delivered messages and they're using the one
called AlphaNova as a way to distract us and when we're very
confident of a victory they'll unleash mountains of very
effective flame material that they've been compiling for the
past several weeks and they'll hope that this material will
leave us in shock and awe and I invite them to be brave enough
to reveal their creative efforts for all to see now so we can
respond in an appropriate manner.
I wonder if I just ruined their little secret plan and I wonder
if I also painted them as some sorts of dweeby dweebettes when I
described their activities of sending private messages and
holding video chat conferences in the nude with other men and
using methods of communication that involve animals with similar
cranial capacity to themselves and if they are making all these
great efforts to win a flame match in an unorthodox way it
really does look like they are taking all of this very seriously
and it also looks like they are scared to fight me like men and
this is exactly how men fight and I really hope I didn't spoil
their little tricky plan because I didn't really want to make
anyone look so stupid and pathetic. Really.
Now bend over.
[/quote]
#Post#: 235--------------------------------------------------
Re: Five x Five
By: Catherine Date: April 18, 2012, 12:54 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=gunzablazin link=topic=80538.msg1011457#msg1011457
date=1334692237]
Well then, this has been interesting so far...It seems team POA
has some momentum as it heads out to sea on its quest to be
recognized as some sort of force to be reckoned with...Is it a
coincidence that it all started on the anniversary of the
sinking of Titanic?...
I don't believe in coincidences...
At first glance it looks as if everything is going
well...Captain Herpes is comfortably sitting in his wheelhouse,
drinking earle grey with lemon and smuggly committing himself to
a steadfast course he's sure will take him into port in an
impressive and timely manner...On deck first mate Trollsbane is
scrubbing the woodwork, trying desperately to regain his sea
legs after an extended absence...Flabio is working diligently in
the galley, trying desperately to prepare something that won't
be spit out and mocked by the guests...Strapon is at the bar
attempting to coo the wealthy aristocrats into taking her to
their stateroom for some good old fashioned prostitution, and
below in 3rd class Caskur, who obviously hasn't slept in days,
is trying ever so hard to prove that she should be allowed to
sit at the head table for dinner, telling stories of her
impoverished life and attempting to make her betters laugh with
her pictures and videos...
Outside all is well...The sea is a sheet of glass, with only the
sporadic bits of ice tossed about by the powers that be...With
only Alphanova to throw obstacles in the way so far it looks as
if this ship will undoubtedly sail to its victory...
But what's that?...You guessed it...Its an iceberg...Sitting
calmly in the water minding its own business the giant structure
is a power unto itself...It needs to do little to derail the
vessel from its current course...Once the POA crew see it they
will go into an all out panic, thrusting the engines into
reverse and steering hard a port...They don't have the
intelligence to slam it head on making the incident survivable,
so they attempt to steer away...It looks as though tragedy has
been averted, as only a few chunks of ice land on the deck, but
POA calls all stop to check for damage and their worst nightmare
is realized...
80% of the iceberg lies beneath the surface, and the damage it
is about to cause will be irreparable...Before long the struggle
to survive will be on, pitting them against time and the odds to
somehow make it off this sinking mass of stupidity that was
destined to fail from the beginning...
____________________________________________________________
Now, it appears that team Powers that be will be down a man or
two for this match...JOO is unavailable at the moment, and lets
face it, if Poofer was ever going to show up it would be to
flame me and claim a victorious troll...Somehow we're not that
concerned...Alphanova's incessant spamming about POA's
homosexuality, rapist tendencies and dead junkie sons will be
effective at wittling away the exterior and collecting much of
the posting responses...Reaper has been for the most part
silent, only exposing team POA for their last minute
shenanigans, but rest assured once he starts there will be no
stopping him...
Team POA has decided that substitutions are allowed, so Poofer
will be replaced with a special guest poster, and until JOO
arrives I have invited someone to post in his place if he so
desires...
And then there's Gunz...Thats right, the number one player in
the game is taking the field...Is it any wonder that whenever I
post the entire active membership decides they need to circle
the wagons?...Of course not...When you perceive a threat the
best course of action is to band together and give the illusion
that you're not in any way intimidated...Its good flame
technique...Unfortunately its also extremely transparent...
Herpes has already been kicked around by me...Strapon got so wet
when I approached that she needed to post a thread in my
honor...Flabio...well...who the fuck cares, he's
useless...Trollsbane and I have never truly crossed paths, but
one can only imagine what will happen when a washed up jackass
tries to use the same 10 year old lames on me that drove him
from flaming to begin with, and Caskur?...I was a little upset
to have to take it off ignore, but so far its been worth
it...Caskur has been in an all out meltdown for
months...Why?...Because dispatching it to the isle of dumbass
usually takes a sentence or less, when most third rate posters
require at least a paragraph...Caskur will stick its own
disgusting foot in its own filthy mouth if it hasn't already...I
don't know, I haven't bothered to do anything but scan the
thread yet...
So I'll give this debacle a good read later, put you imbeciles
to shame, outchop your *tries to hold in deep laughter* star
poster and maybe even put together a video worth watching...The
thread deserves at least one...
Tell the band to keep playing, fellas...You'll need to be
soothed as you slowly but surely settle beneath the waters of
shame...
[/quote]
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