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DIR Return to: Questions about the Use of Language
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#Post#: 17147--------------------------------------------------
How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Aliph Date: June 25, 2019, 5:31 pm
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I have no idea for the correct way to say in English that
someone has parents or ancestors of different ethnic origins.
For instance like former president Obama, father African, mother
white American.
In French there is the word “métisse” which isn’t derogatory at
all like the Spanish mestizo or the Italian meticcio.
How is it in English?
Additional question: can you say “Michelle Obama is black“?
#Post#: 17153--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: NealC Date: June 25, 2019, 8:01 pm
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You can say 'mixed race', but you had better do it carefully.
Too many people here are looking for a reason to be aggrieved.
"Michelle Obama is black" is fine. Every once in a while there
is a small backlash against "black", but it remains the safest.
Today a woman came in to the store and was discussing flowers
with my son. She put off a final decision, saying she wanted to
get her husband involved in deciding. My son told her "Fine,
have him come and see me". The woman snarled that she would
have HER see my son. So the womans husband is a woman, which is
fine but how the hell are we supposed to keep up with the
individual pronoun choices? Sometimes it seems people are
looking for a reason to get angry.
My father always told me not to offend gay people, we have a
sizable community near us and in my dad's words: "Them homos
got a lot of money". Sigh. He did live in a simpler time.
#Post#: 17155--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Irena Date: June 26, 2019, 12:56 am
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[quote author=NealC link=topic=1179.msg17153#msg17153
date=1561510890]
Today a woman came in to the store and was discussing flowers
with my son. She put off a final decision, saying she wanted to
get her husband involved in deciding. My son told her "Fine,
have him come and see me". The woman snarled that she would
have HER see my son. So the womans husband is a woman, which is
fine but how the hell are we supposed to keep up with the
individual pronoun choices? Sometimes it seems people are
looking for a reason to get angry.
[/quote]
Hysterical. Seriously, now, this is the first I've ever heard of
a woman being referred to as a husband. It occurs to me, though,
that the husband may have been an ordinary male husband at
first, but is now transitioning to a woman. Otherwise, he would
have been a wife all along.
#Post#: 17156--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Aliph Date: June 26, 2019, 1:06 am
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Difficult to keep up, really. However where I live, lesbians
usually speak of their partner as “wife” even if they are not
married (to marry they can go to Portugal) and gays speak of
their husbands.
#Post#: 17158--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Aliph Date: June 26, 2019, 1:10 am
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[quote author=NealC link=topic=1179.msg17153#msg17153
date=1561510890]
You can say 'mixed race', but you had better do it carefully.
Too many people here are looking for a reason to be aggrieved.
[/quote]
How can I use that expression? Can I say “prince Harry’s wife is
of mixed race” or “they adopted a Brazilian child of mixed race”
#Post#: 17164--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: NealC Date: June 26, 2019, 3:24 am
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It really is ok to note that she is of "mixed race", the words
are fine. Sofia, both of your sentences are perfectly fine ways
of expressing information without being offensive. The
conversation itself is what might put people on edge.
In a very real way I just want the rules about how to address
people, I am not interested in offending their choices. Irena I
agree the situation was very odd, maybe the woman was crazy but
my son came in rather frustrated by the encounter. He is the
kind of person who doesn't mind getting 'in your face' if he
thinks you are being stupid. He didn't like being made to feel
he was insensitive. Can you imagine if it was a transition? I
cant keep a scorecard on sexual choices/changes just to have a
polite conversation.
I had a customer call in once looking for information on their
order. Male voice, looking for order for Frank Smith, order
under the name of Carol Smith. "Oh is Carol your wife's name?".
We get a lot of wives buying things for their husbands. "Oh
no, that is me, I am in transition".
He (I am being insensitive calling him 'he'?)was nice about it,
but it is all getting too complicated for me.
#Post#: 17170--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Alharacas Date: June 26, 2019, 4:04 am
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Sofia, please note that the following is in no way intended to
be a criticism of your question, okay? :)
It's just - has it occurred to anyone that we might be doing
ourselves - well, our society - a disservice by wondering so
much about correct terminology? Not that we shouldn't try not to
offend people, of course! But shouldn't we start wondering more
often whether some information we're about to give is actually
pertinent to what we're discussing at a given moment?
What I mean is: you wouldn't say "my blond/obese friend Tom",
would you? Not unless you were specifically discussing hair
colour, dieting and/or prejudices. So, why keep saying "openly
gay politician So-and-so says cyclists should be made to wear
helmet", for example? I noticed that this kept happening when
Berlin had a mayor who happened to be gay. And remember how
often we heard and read words along the lines of "Barack Obama,
first African American president of the US bla-bla-bla"? As if
we were all colour-blind.
Do you think not pointing it out all the time would have made
these politicians' race/sexual orientation appear a pink
elephant?
Neal, I agree the woman was just looking for a reason to get
upset. But if you happen to have a sizeable gay community near
you, then why doesn't your son simply switch to the plural
pronoun? Even though "Have them call me" would make it sound as
if the person in question had a harem. ;)
#Post#: 17173--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: NealC Date: June 26, 2019, 5:41 am
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That was actually part of his frustration Alharacas! He was
speaking in the local accent/vernacular, which basically amounts
to "Have em call me", with the em sound being naturally heard as
'him', but could be heard as 'them'. She was digging for a
reason to get upset.
I also think you are right, first black, openly gay, first
woman, I really don't want to hear about it. Certainly not
every time they are mentioned. We will have finally arrived
when none of that matters anymore. You know, "content of their
character" not "color of their skin".
#Post#: 17175--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Nikola Date: June 26, 2019, 6:14 am
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[quote author=NealC link=topic=1179.msg17173#msg17173
date=1561545708]
That was actually part of his frustration Alharacas! He was
speaking in the local accent/vernacular, which basically amounts
to "Have em call me", with the em sound being naturally heard as
'him', but could be heard as 'them'. She was digging for a
reason to get upset.
[/quote]
I believe that one of the basic principles of etiquette is that
if someone makes a mistake (and I'm not even sure your son made
one but let's say he did), you don't rub their nose in it. If
someone kicks up a fuss over something that was said politely
and with good intentions, they're the ones showing bad manners.
You have to be quite messed up to deliberately make someone feel
bad, especially someone you've met for the first time. I'd like
to think that the majority of people would either leave it or
correct him and move on, maybe make a lighthearted comment about
it to make it less awkward.
#Post#: 17177--------------------------------------------------
Re: How do you say that someone is of mixed race?
By: Truman Overby Date: June 26, 2019, 6:52 am
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[quote author=Alharacas link=topic=1179.msg17170#msg17170
date=1561539858]
I noticed that this kept happening when Berlin had a mayor who
happened to be gay. And remember how often we heard and read
words along the lines of "Barack Obama, first African American
president of the US bla-bla-bla"? As if we were all
colour-blind.
Do you think not pointing it out all the time would have made
these politicians' race/sexual orientation appear a pink
elephant?
[/quote]
What you may not understand is that the press here in the US,
which is rabidly liberal, is the one doing the labeling of
people. They promote it. You won't hear the man on the street
preface politicians or anyone else with their skin color or
sexual orientation. I keep warning foreigners about the biases
of the US media but no one listens. Maybe Neal for Long Island
can help me out on this one.
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