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#Post#: 2719--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Kaylynna23 Date: August 11, 2011, 2:09 pm
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Dating Protocol
WHITE WOMEN:
Description: cid:1.557815907@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First date:
You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date:
You get to grope all over and make out a bit.
Third date:
You get to have sex but only when she wants to and only in
the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
Description: cid:2.557815907@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
Description: cid:3.557815907@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date:
You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti &
meatballs.
Third Date:
You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat
ring.
5th Anniversary:
You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of
having sex.
6th Anniversary:
You find yourself a Mistress.
CHINESE WOMEN:
Description: cid:4.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First date:
You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date:
You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens
again.
Third date:
You don't even get to the third date and you realize nothing
is ever going to happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
Description: cid:5.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First date:
Meet her parents.
Second date:
Set the date of the wedding.
Third date:
Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
Description: cid:6.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date:
You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive
dinner.
Third Date:
You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date:
She's pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
Description: cid:7.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and
have
sex in the back of her car.
Second Date:
She's pregnant.
Third Date:
She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, her two
sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her
sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on
rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used
to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.
JEWISH WOMEN:
Description: cid:8.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
You spend all your money to impress her.
Second Date:
You take a loan to keep the image
Third Date:
You're broke, she finds someone wealthier
ARAB WOMEN:
Description: cid:9.557815908@web36204.mail.mud.yahoo.com
First Date:
Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles,
Friends and entire Arab community finds out.
Second Date:
You are shot dead in the street and your balls are fed to
the goats.
(No third date)
The POINT?
DON'T YOU JUST LOVE IRISH WOMEN?
Peace is that brief, glorious moment in history when
everyone stands around – reloading!
#Post#: 2723--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Layna Date: August 11, 2011, 4:28 pm
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Too funny ;D
#Post#: 3131--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Layna Date: September 7, 2011, 9:19 pm
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I Love Spaghetti :D
[attachment deleted by admin]
#Post#: 3132--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Cubette Tx Date: September 7, 2011, 9:31 pm
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Nom nom nom!!! :)
#Post#: 3136--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: StrikeZone Date: September 7, 2011, 10:22 pm
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Yuck-o!
#Post#: 3138--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Layna Date: September 7, 2011, 10:32 pm
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;D
#Post#: 3142--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Cubette Tx Date: September 7, 2011, 10:56 pm
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Stolen from another site...
.
True story from a Kansas State Highway Patrol officer:
I made a traffic stop on an elderly lady the other day for
speeding
on U.S. 166 Eastbound at Mile Marker 73 just East of Sedan , KS
.
I asked for her driver's license, registration, and proof of
insurance.
The lady took out the required information and handed it to me.
In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced
age)
to see she had a conceal carry permit. I looked at her and ask
if
she had a weapon in her possession at this time.
She responded that she indeed had a .45 automatic in her glove
box.
Something---body language, or the way she said it---made me want
to ask if she had any other firearms. She did admit to also
having
a 9mm Glock in her center console. Now I had to ask one more
time if that was all. She responded once again that she did have
just one more, a .38 special in her purse. I then asked her what
was she so afraid of.
She looked me right in the eye and said, "Not a damn thing!"
#Post#: 3158--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Layna Date: September 8, 2011, 3:00 pm
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LMAO!!! Gotta steal that one!! :D
#Post#: 3160--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Kaylynna23 Date: September 8, 2011, 3:02 pm
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OMG LOL...I needed that!!
#Post#: 3259--------------------------------------------------
Re: Comic Relief
By: Kaylynna23 Date: September 15, 2011, 2:55 pm
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This is hilarious....Grandparents were trying to use a web-cam &
accidentally recorded themselves whilst trying to figure it
out....too funny! Scroll down after you click the
link...there's also a story about a kitty.
HTML http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/trending-now/senior-citizens-accidentally-become-sensations-lost-colorado-cat-152046992.html
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