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#Post#: 45--------------------------------------------------
Providing therapy only by a female therapist following a sexual
abuse by a man
DIR By: Slavka
Date: May 22, 2018, 7:27 am
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The topic was: If a woman has been sexually abused by a male,
there are some that state that therapy for them must be provided
by a female therapist.
I don't think this is set in stone but it comes down to the
choice of that particular individual. I have worked with quite a
few women, who were sexually abused when young and they found
working with male therapists awkward and decided they wanted a
female therapist. One of them said that the voice of the
therapist and his dark, dimly lit room reminded her of her
abuser and the room it took place. The memories came flooding
for her and she had to get out.
I worked in the community mental health teams for a few years
and such preferences were always respected. E.g. we had a male
client who only worked with female support workers because he
was abused by men when young. Or elderly ladies wouldn't accept
care from a male carer and their choice was always respected.
I think it should be the same with therapy.
#Post#: 51--------------------------------------------------
Re: Providing therapy only by a female therapist following a
sexual abuse by a man
DIR By: VicTS
Date: May 23, 2018, 4:30 am
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This is a subject that I have considered for a while. I work in
an organisation that provides support for woman who have been
sexually abused as children. One of the stipulations of this is
that we are all women counselors and the office staff are all
women. It is about empowering women to feel safe. As Slavka
describes, a lot of the women appreciate this.
However, having considered it I wondered about the intensity and
scope of the therapy, if a client needs to confront her past,
which most do, it may be actually helpful to be faced with a
male therapist to work with the memories that are surfacing at a
faster rate than they may with a female therapist.
This I have felt was discriminatory, it is a hinting at all
males are sexual perpetrators and the fear continues for the
victims. In fact, they remain victims not survivors because we
are sanitising the space they have therapy and they could leave
the office and walk straight into a man! The world is full of
them and clients live in the world with men. I have often felt
that for a client to get the intensive therapy they require, the
fear they feel may be enforced by the fact that it is only
female therapists. If they met a male therapist with the right
skills this may aid their recovery and therapeutic journey.
In my organisation there have been structural changes are we
have had male workmen in the building, this has not been
announced and the clients have not complained.
I also work outreach in a building that has visitors of both
sexes and clients also have not felt it was an issues.
I am not disagreeing with the idea of a female only therapist,
but have considered the discriminatory aspects, this could be
discrimination against male therapists.
#Post#: 56--------------------------------------------------
Re: Providing therapy only by a female therapist following a
sexual abuse by a man
DIR By: Slavka
Date: May 23, 2018, 6:47 am
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Vic you raise an interesting point; it could be discriminatory
towards male therapists and I liked your expression of
'sanitising the space they have therapy'. Yes, they have to
confront those issues and surely they will walk into a man. It's
about healing the trauma and rebuilding their self confidence
and esteem so they can function around men. But they also need
to feel safe in therapy...I feel a personal choice should be
important here but I appreciate that not all women may have that
choice (not sure if NHS waiting lists for therapy accommodate
preferences).
Conversely, a male therapist may not feel it's appropriate to
work with women who were abused or they may feel awkward.
It certainly is interesting to ponder on.
#Post#: 60--------------------------------------------------
Re: Providing therapy only by a female therapist following a
sexual abuse by a man
DIR By: VicTS
Date: May 23, 2018, 7:17 am
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Yes, good points, I wonder how male therapists could feel, they
may fear they would say the wrong thing or their physical
appearance would be frightening. A male therapist on Facebook
posted to a group if he should wear shorts in the hotter
weather, the replies were mainly saying yes but they need to be
at knee level. He then added that he was 6 foot 2 and 24
stone!!! I has a picture of his legs taking over the room!
Seriously though, that could be a trigger for a client.
It is certainly worth thought and pondering!
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