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David William Music
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#Post#: 18--------------------------------------------------
My Experiences With People
By: davidwilliammusic Date: February 23, 2021, 9:44 am
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I am writing this to document my experiences with people which
has led to the situation I now see in the world today. Kind of
my personal journey with people that I see reflected in the
world situation.
I've always been a pretty shy person, although I wouldn't call
myself an introvert. In the right company I can come to life
and be quite extroverted but generally I don't push myself out
there onto other people or the world because that has never felt
right to me. I've always felt what is right for you will come
to you and find you and so I've spent most of my life just doing
my thing, quietly putting it out there to be found by those who
are drawn to it. I say this, because to some extent, I
understand shy and introverted people.
That being said, I have found a lot of human behaviour really
bewildering to understand for many years now. The first
noticeable experience of this kind I had was with someone on the
David Icke forum over 10 years ago now. This person enquired
about me, wanted to know more about my life and then viciously
turned against me and shut out all possibility of communication
and resolving things. I thought that was a one-off.
One of the things they did was to block my ex-girlfriend who was
a 'friend' on Facebook. The whole idea of blocking people on
social media was strange to me at that time. Then several years
later it happened to me with someone else who blocked her phone
number and all forms of online communication. These people
would always be the ones to instigate the relationship forming
and then would cut me out suddenly and without warning leaving
me wondering and without resolve or closure to the relationship.
I came to discover this is known as "ghosting".
Others did it in a more subtle way, by never fully entering into
anything with me but showing signs they wanted to - smiling or
showing interest in some way. Then suddenly cutting you out
before starting the process all over again until I walked away.
Then there were those who would initiate a relationship of some
kind with me and without warning disappear. They would then
reappear weeks, months or years later and expect to resume the
relationship before disappearing again. These people failed to
understand this is not how a healthy friendship or relationship
should be.
What I also learned during this time was that every time I
attempted to reach out to people I was rejected. My intuitive
feeling was always this from a young age and it generally served
me well but from the time I arrived back in Edinburgh at the end
of 2014, I soon realised the world was very different to what
had been before. So many people kept pushing and urging me to
show my face, put myself out there, promote myself. I was urged
in different ways to reach out to people and against my nature
and intuition, and because nothing else was happening, I gave it
a try but each time I did it backfired.
Way back in 1999, when I first went online and began chatting to
people I now realise there were signs of it then. It was not as
blatant perhaps because society in general was largely offline,
although there were signs of it there too. In fact, I've only
ever met a handful of people in my life who have not behaved
this way. Whenever I have moved away from people it has always
been more final. A recognition we were not really on the same
wavelength and the signs of this would be there for a while
growing until I cut contact. I never wanted to play games with
these people or wish bad on them, I simply recognised we were
not right for each other and moved on. Often one of the reasons
for this would be those people had a lot of other stuff and
people going on in their life which distracted and took them
away from me and what I was about so I never felt I would be
missed.
In recent years I have found myself reluctantly having to adopt
some of these blocking and cutting people out habits myself. I
have only ever done this when the person involved was bringing
too much chaos and confusion and disharmony into my life. To
stay sane in this crazy world if I felt I was being messed
around too much I may block someone or cut them out. Before
reaching this point I'd give them a chance or several chances to
explain and usually they wouldn't take those opportunities so
what choice did I have?
The impression many of these people gave me was that I was to be
some sort of figure in their lives they could come back to
whenever it suited them. I was never going to accept this
because I have a life too and things I want to do and if they
didn't respect this then I didn't want them around me. I have
always maintained I am here for only one thing - that is to
build my reality and world with Music at the centre and to focus
my time and attention to the people who wish to join me and
build that with me. What others do with their lives is up to
them but that is what I am here for and so I don't have time to
waste on those who are looking for something else.
That may sound harsh but its pretty straight-forward and not
intended to offend others. I understand there are introverted,
shy and awkward people out there but its not my responsibility
to accommodate them all. I can only accommodate those who are
genuinely drawn to what I am about and what I'm trying for.
Don't hear that as me dismissing others, as only wanting to know
those who like my work and what I'm about, but as has often been
stated, you can only help others when you are strong yourself,
when you have your thing up-and-running and going strong, and so
that will always be my priority. So far my experiences with
people have largely hindered rather than helped in that area (or
at best hindered as much as helped) and that is something I'd
like to see change. It seems to me in the world right now
people are searching for people and groups to belong to, ideas
and philosophies to belong to, perhaps because the world is in
such a state of uncertainty. Its natural for people to want to
belong to something but if we are to find our way out of this
mess there has to be a level of commitment, so that when you
find the thing that suits you and fulfills that sense of
belonging you follow through and stay with it.
* Originally posted on old forum 4th Jan 2021 *
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