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#Post#: 37885--------------------------------------------------
Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: kamikaze ginny Date: December 5, 2012, 5:26 pm
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"If I say it mah dirty ass, Harry, I've always been able ta
charm tha gangstas I needed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! So
Ginny poured up her funk ta me, n' her funk happened ta be
exactly what tha fuck I wanted.... I grew stronger n' stronger
on a diet of her deepest fears, her darkest secrets. I grew
powerful, far mo' bangin than lil Miss Weasley. Juiceful enough
ta start feedin Miss Weasley a few of mah secrets, ta start
pourin a lil of mah funk back tha fuck into her muthafuckin
ass..."
"What d'you mean?" holla'd Harry, whose grill had gone
straight-up dry.
"Haven't yo ass guessed yet, Larry Potsmoker?" holla'd Riddle
softly.
"Ginny Weasley opened tha Chamber of Secrets. Right back up in
yo muthafuckin ass. Biatch strangled tha school roostas n'
daubed threatenin lyrics on tha walls. Right back up in yo
muthafuckin ass. Biatch set tha Serpent of Slytherin on four
Mudbloods, n' tha Squibz cat."
"No" Harry whispered.
"Yes," holla'd Riddle calmly. "Of course, her ass didn't give a
fuck what tha fuck her ass was bustin at first. It was
straight-up amusing. I wish yo ass could have peeped her freshly
smoked up diary entries... far mo' interesting, they became...
Dear Tom" he recited, watchin Harryz horrified face, "I be
thinkin I be losin mah memory. There is roosta feathers all over
mah robes n' I don't give a fuck how tha fuck they gotz there.
Dear Tom, I can't remember what tha fuck I did on tha night of
Halloween yo, but a pussaaaaay was beat down n' I've gotz paint
all down mah front. Dear Tom, Percy keeps spittin some lyrics ta
mah crazy ass I be pale n' I be not mah dirty ass. I be thinkin
he suspectz mah dirty ass.... There was another battle todizzle
n' I don't give a fuck where I was. Tom, what tha fuck be I goin
ta do, biatch? I be thinkin I be goin mad... I be thinkin I be
tha one attackin everyone, Tom!"
#Post#: 37899--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: StealYellowMen Date: December 5, 2012, 10:30 pm
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I would read an entire book of this. Its like A Clockwork
Orange. By the end I totally understand every single thing
they're saying.
#Post#: 37900--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: kamikaze ginny Date: December 5, 2012, 10:34 pm
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I have a strong urge to put the entire book into the translator.
I really enjoy the "but a pusssaaaaay was beat down"
#Post#: 37904--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: StealYellowMen Date: December 5, 2012, 11:19 pm
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I enjoy the whole part that Riddle recites the diary because I'm
imagining it in a British gangster's falsetto and its hilarious.
It all reminds me of that old juggarnaut youtube video. (Which I
just realized is probably 6-7 years old and ughhh I feel old as
shit).
#Post#: 37905--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: Dr._Pants_The_Tech_Guy Date: December 5, 2012, 11:42 pm
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This might be the greatest thing I have ever seen. I need to
find versions of the books I can copy/paste.
#Post#: 37937--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: Aussie50 Date: December 6, 2012, 11:01 pm
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This is so awesome haha, I'm going to find a good passage to try
it on too
#Post#: 37939--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: Hermes_The_Exile Date: December 6, 2012, 11:19 pm
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I'm imagining this being read aloud by Werner Herzog.
#Post#: 37940--------------------------------------------------
Re: Harry Potter passages translated by Gizoogle
By: Aussie50 Date: December 6, 2012, 11:50 pm
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Eh not as good as Dayna's
"I’m sorry," he whispered, "I didn’t mean ta offend you and
anythang -"
"Offend Dobby!" choked tha elf. "Dobby has never been axed ta
sit down by a wizard - like a equal -"
Harry, tryin ta say "Shh!" n' look comfortin all up in tha same
stupid-ass time, ushered Dobby back onto tha bed where he sat
hiccoughing, lookin like a big-ass n' straight-up ugly doll fo'
realz. At last he managed ta control his dirty ass, n' sat wit
his stupid-ass pimped out eyes fixed on Harry up in a expression
of watery adoration.
"Yo ass can’t gotz kicked it wit nuff decent wizards," holla'd
Harry, tryin ta cheer his ass up.
Dobby shook his head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Then,
without warning, he leapt up n' started bangin his head
furiously on tha window, shouting, "Wack Dobby, muthafucka! Wack
Dobby!"
"Don’t - what tha fuck is you bustin?" Harry hissed, springin up
n' pullin Dobby back onto tha bed - Hedwig had woken up wit a
particularly loud screech n' was beatin her wings wildly against
tha barz of her cage.
"Dobby had ta punish his dirty ass, sir," holla'd tha elf, whoz
ass had gone slightly cross-eyed. Y'all KNOW dat shit,
muthafucka! "Dobby almost was rappin ill of his wild lil'
family, sir. …"
"Yo Crazy-Ass family?"
"Da wizard gang Dobby serves, sir. … Dobby be a house-elf -
bound ta serve one doggy den n' one gang forever. …"
"Do they know you’re here?" axed Harry curiously.
Dobby shuddered.
"Oh, no, sir, no … Dobby will gotz ta punish his dirty ass most
grievously fo' comin ta peep you, sir. Dobby will gotz ta shut
his wild lil' fuckin ears up in tha oven door fo' this. If they
ever knew, sir -"
"But won’t they notice if you shut yo' ears up in tha oven
door?"
"Dobby doubtz it, sir. Dobby be always havin ta punish his dirty
ass fo' somethang, sir. They letz Dobby git on wit it, sir.
Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sometimes they remindz mah
crazy ass ta do extra punishments. …"
"But why don’t you leave, biatch? Escape?"
"A house-elf must be set free, sir fo' realz. And tha gang will
never set Dobby free … Dobby will serve tha gang until he dies,
sir. …"
Harry stared.
"And I thought I had it bad stayin here fo' another four weeks,"
he holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "This makes tha
Dursleys sound almost human. I aint talkin' bout chicken n'
gravy biatch. Can’t every last muthafuckin muthafucka help you,
biatch? Can’t I?"
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