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       Conscious Discipline Book Study
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   DIR Return to: Chapter 5
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       #Post#: 44--------------------------------------------------
       Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness
   DIR By: thequeenteacher
       Date: March 28, 2016, 11:54 am
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       Chapter 5 says that "Assertiveness clearly tells children what
       to do so that they may successfully meet your expectations."
       How do you assertively convey expectations in your classroom
       without being aggressive?
       #Post#: 50--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness
   DIR By: Katie
       Date: April 1, 2016, 2:51 pm
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       I am trying to get better at being more assertive vs. being
       aggressive. I've found that lately I am able to calm myself down
       when I'm feeling frustrated and use a strategy to deal with the
       issue. I think trying to focus on what I want the kids to do has
       really helped. I feel like I have been wired to say "What are
       you doing? Why did you do that?" Now I'm trying to say things
       like "You wanted to sit in that spot. You may not hit. Next time
       say, Move please so they know you want to sit there." I also
       have noticed that when I give a clearer picture of what I want
       them to do, they respond better. There is not a clear picture
       for the word don't so saying don't do something is not as
       helpful as telling them what to do. That has also helped me be
       clearer about what I want them to do.
       #Post#: 55--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness
   DIR By: Carmen
       Date: April 11, 2016, 12:20 am
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       When I was reading the chapter on assertiveness and the Power of
       Attention there is a passage that compares attention with a
       flashlight that we use to light the sidewalk in the dark. When
       we use the flashlight our attention focus only in the part the
       flashlight is illuminating, and this part has to be the good
       side that will take as securely to the place we want to go
       Assertiveness requires as to focus our attention in the things
       we want students to do. Because I am used to focus on what I do
       not want students to do, and the picture of seeing the students
       talking is clearly in my mind, the first thing I do is to tell
       students to "stop talking." For me is not being easy to switch
       from the "Don't" and focus on what "I want them to do". In this
       case, "Stay Quiet" and work in your papers. It takes conscious
       effort to shift and focus our attention in the positive action I
       want students to do. I am not very good at assertively conveying
       expectations without being aggressive. When I used the word
       "Stay Quiet" I am being aggressive, I will need to say Stay
       Silent and focus on your paper and then follow up with
       encouragement words.
       #Post#: 58--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness
   DIR By: shayla
       Date: April 25, 2016, 6:08 pm
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       I love the exact quotes Katie had about assertiveness. I love
       the flashlight analogy. I feel I notice I am assertive only in
       certain moments if I was always it would help students adhere to
       it more.
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