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#Post#: 242--------------------------------------------------
Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Walrus
Date: April 24, 2013, 5:33 pm
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Hey everyone,
Recently I started self-NCR treatment and think it is worthwhile
to document my experiences in order to both learn and educate!
I hope someone may find this useful. If you have any advice or
guidance to offer me, I'd greatly appreciate it (I posted my
questions at the bottom)!
The protocol I am following was describediny an email written by
Ben, which another forum member forwarded to me.
Session 1 Began Tues, April 16, 2013
4 consecutive days: Day 1 (D1): upper and lower left turbinates
(UL/L). Day 2 (D2): upper and lower right turbinates (UL/R).
D3=D1. D4=D2.
1 finger cot.
Treat each turbinate 3-4 times each day.
D1 involved becoming comfortable with sticking a balloon up my
nose. At some point, the balloon inflated into my throat,
gagging me. Then it popped. After that, I decided I'd had
enough for the day. Side effects of this day were soreness
behind my nose on the left side. Probably from stretching the
turbinates.
D2. I had a frustrating time getting the balloon out of the
turbinates and into my throat. For some reason I find this more
difficult on the right side. Expanding the balloon in the
turbinates is painful, and caused me to tear up. I found trying
switching turbinates helps, as well as changing balloons.
Eventually I got to the open space though. I found 3 pumps of
the bulb worked. 4 pumps and I would start to gag. I also felt
popping in my ears after 3 pumps. This was a similar sensation
to when flying on an airplane. Side effects again were soreness
behind my nose, this time on the right side though. I also
developed flu-like symptoms, mainly stuffiness.
I noticed improvement in facial symmetry after this day, which
amazed me. Also, I believe my wonky feet (I have duck feet,
especially on the right side) straightened out somewhat.
D3, D4. The flu-like symptoms had subsided, so I proceeded with
treatment. I don't remember specific incidences from these
days, so they must have been relatively unremarkable. I would
inflate until my ears popped, and then would deflate. A couple
more balloons popped, so I switched from size medium cots to
large.
2 day break.
Other effects from session 1: Tiredness. I would often need to
lie down after treatment. Feelings of calmness and focus.
Temporary sensation in random body parts (arms, hands, legs).
Learning to attach the finger cot well was frustrating. Very
important though.
Session 2 Began Mon, April 22, 2013
I am still just becoming comfortable with the treatment. It's a
little unsettling to inflate a balloon (finger cot) inside your
head!
4 consecutive days.
1 finger cot.
Treat each turbinate 3-4 times each day.
I began treating the middle turbinate as well.
D1:UML/L. No new and remarkable sensations. Again, inflation
until my ears popped. 3 pumps was no longer working, likely
because of a new balloon and it being attached differently. I
instead used short, quick pumps, which inflated the balloon
slower, but in a more controlled manner. This involved 20, 30
or more little pumps. I'm still apprehensive about
over-inflating the balloon and harming myself, even though I'm
not sure if this is even possible with only 1 balloon. As I see
it, over-inflating will either a) pop the balloon or b) gag me,
both of which I have already done and which caused no harm.
However, it is always best to trust one's instincts, so I will
continue to proceed with caution. I will try and inflate more
as I become more comfortable with the treatment.
D2:UML/R. Again, pain and frustration due to balloon inflating
inside the turbinates instead of the space in behind. Changing
balloons solved this. I'm still trying to determine how much I
should be inflating the cot. At around 3:50 in the vid below
you can hear how much air is released from the balloon. This is
significantly more than I have been inflating, so I will
gradually work towards more inflation.
Mild headache after treatment, behind my right eye.
HTML https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ngRpnBN3ag
D3=D1: Still getting comfortable with inflating the balloon. I
used deeper pumps today, and even though I thought I was pumping
a lot, not much air was released upon deflation. I would
inflate until my ears popped, then slowly keep inflating. Often
my ears would pop again. I do not believe I am over-inflating
as I am not usually gagging (I gagged once today, which I had
not done since session 1).
No post-treatment symptoms whatsoever so far. No fatigue either
for the first time.
Edit: D4=D2: The entire procedure was more comfortable today.
Again, inflating until ears popped, then deflation. At this
point it gets harder to pump, as I gather the balloon is pushing
against my skull.
No PT symptoms again or fatigue
Questions
How much inflation have people found to work? Is the optimal
amount of inflation to the point just before gagging?
How many times do people treat each turbinate each day?
Thanks!
#Post#: 248--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Walrus
Date: April 29, 2013, 9:02 pm
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Session 3 Mon, Apr 29, 2013.
I took a 3 day break after Session 2. I knew the break was
necessary as I was developing an aversion to treatment. This is
in contrast to some days where I am eager for treatment. Days
like today!
D1: I treated the entire left side in the early afternoon.
Treatment was easy. I am getting much more comfortable with
this. I treated each turbinate at least 4 times. I stop as
soon as there is aversion (ie. I hesitate) before inflation.
This is a subconscious reaction, but is also easy to determine
consciously. Just ask yourself "do I want to treat again?". If
the answer isn't an immediate "yes" and more like a "uhhh... I
dunno", then I know I'm done. If I get to the point where the
answer is a resounding "NO!" then I have over-treated and risk
harming myself.
No PT symptoms. A little fatigue a couple hours later, so a lay
down for a bit.
In the early evening, I had the urge to treat again, so I did.
The entire right side this time. Again, treatment was easy. I
was less eager than earlier though, and treated a little
gentler. 4 treatments on the upper and middle. After 2
treatments on the bottom I felt I was done.
Mild symptoms after the second treatment in the form of light
body soreness. It's hard to describe, as there are no specific
or chronic sensations... I just kind of feel like things are
changing... my body feels a bit sensitive is the best way to
describe it. I didn't feel this way after treating only the
left side.
I finished treatment just about an hour ago, and I feel good.
At the moment, I like the idea of treating all turbinates in a
day, and will continue with this procedure until my body tells
me to rest. I'm not sure if I'll do them all at once, or treat
the left and right sides at different times.
I have to say, I feel good right now from todays double
treatment. Very "balanced" and "open". The best I have felt
since beginning treatment.
#Post#: 249--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: MessiahMews
Date: April 29, 2013, 9:06 pm
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Awesome report! Can't wait to see your before and after pics!
#Post#: 266--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Walrus
Date: May 13, 2013, 8:56 pm
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During session 3, I started becoming quite comfortable with the
treatment. So instead of following a schedule for treatment, I
decided to simply treat as my body dictated.
This means I treated a lot in the past couple weeks. Sometimes
up to several times per day. I was also treating each turbinate
during each session. At the most, I was probably performing 5-6
treatments per day. For a while I was craving treatments. I
was also experiencing practically no post-treatment symptoms
except for brief and mild sensations in extremities, and a
feeling of sensitivity.
Changes I have noticed since beginning treatment: The first
change was an improvement in symmetry as I described before.
Next I notices my forehead looking taller and the back of my
head looking flatter. Now it seems my maxilla is beginning to
come forward. Also, I believe I may have grown bigger and
stronger, based on comments from friends (I have not measured
myself though). Also I'm under the impression my throat cavity
has increased in size as I am now capable of inflating the
balloon more (I have managed to pop a few large balloons).
However, I have found that inflating until gagging is not
necessary. I have found inflating until hearing the "cracking"
or "popping" in the ears is optimal. Inflating until gagging
also causes me to go through a lot of balloons.
I have also found times when treating a certain turbinate
produces significantly more "cracking", which is higher pitched
and longer lasting. Almost like squeaking. It is possible that
this could be just pressure in my ear, but then I am not sure
why it occurs seemingly randomly.
For the last couple days I have been taking a break, as I
developed an aversion to treatment. I will probably continue
treatments tomorrow.
Thanks for the reply MM! I actually haven't been documenting
via photographs as I don't have a decent camera, so there's a
good chance I won't ever post pictures. Sorry to disappoint!
#Post#: 267--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Tyler
Date: May 14, 2013, 3:28 pm
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Your journal has been a great inspiration to me, Walrus!
Last night, I chose to alter my consciousness for a few hours by
inhaling cannabis smoke. Consequently, while in a state of
awareness toward my physical body, I became cognizant of every
point of compression and discomfort that my distorted skull was
applying to my brain. If my consciousness, and brain, could
communicate using words, I know they would both be screaming all
of the time: "It's cramped, and we don't have any room to
breathe! Let us out!!!"
It is remarkable to me that, in a mentally acute state wherein
the ego dominates my consciousness, I am unable to detect this
sort of consistent pain, but I suppose that, when an individual
has been living with discomfort for so long, the pain eventually
becomes like white noise; that is to say, it becomes
undetectable to the consciousness.
While it was discomforting to be made aware of my own cramped,
disorienting cranium, something marvelous also occurred as I
read your most recent report. I don't know why it occurred all
of a sudden, but, suddenly in that moment, I could clearly
imagine your experience as if it was happening to me. In other
words, for a brief instance, I could vividly integrate your
description into my consciousness, and it brought an amazing
sense of relief to the point where I nearly wept! I will go so
far as to say that, for a brief moment of amazing
consciousness-freedom, my personal reality shifted to
accommodate yours!
After the experience, like a waking dream, had faded into my
conscious block, I got up and walked into the bathroom,
determined to make this procedure work for me just as it has
worked for you, even though I had also become cognizant of the
fact that I was incredibly scared of it! Being aware of my
physical body certainly helped; therefore, with great
determination, I finally managed to succeed in expanding the
balloon, I believe for the first time, against my sphenoid bone!
My vision became a bit blurry, and I felt dizzy, afterward, but
I also felt incredible joy because of this success, which had
eluded me for weeks!
I am going to practice again today, knowing that I can
eventually make this work!
I do have one question for you, though, which might serve to
hasten my progress. My question is this: Did you initially
struggle to hold your breath while inflating the balloon against
your sphenoid bone?
I realized last night that my experimenting over the past few
weeks has been hindered every time because I had not been
holding my breath while expanding the balloon; hence, my tongue
was not present to block the balloon from entering the back of
my mouth. I am now holding my breath as hard as I can, yet the
pressure keeps winning, causing my tongue to buckle under its
weight so that the balloon slips down and gags me. I will try to
use smaller amounts of pressure to control the procedure in a
more nuanced fashion, yet I find myself curious: has the
expansion of your throat cavity lead to greater ease in holding
your tongue, and your breath, while pumping air into the
balloon?
#Post#: 269--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Walrus
Date: May 15, 2013, 12:05 pm
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Your posts have inspired me as well Tyler. I always find your
writing to be very honest and insightful, and I am grateful for
all your posts. Keep 'em coming!
I know what you mean by the white noise of suffering. I too
have been dealing with this for a long time. It is in the last
few years I began to question my life, what I have become, how I
became this way, and how I want to be. I became aware that I
had a serious problem at the most fundamental level. This of
course is my defective skull. And once I became aware of this
"noise", it was no longer possible to ignore. It was now in the
forefront of my existence and left me no choice but to try and
fix it.
I believe your emotional reaction was due to a realization of
how much this treatment can help you. Before I began NCR, I
would sometimes imagine myself with my skull as it was meant to
be (as it was when I was a child, before orthodontics) and feel
so eased. My depression would disappear. Just from thoughts.
It made me realize how badly I wanted to fix my reality.
I have a similar reaction too when I look at photographs of
myself from my childhood, when I was still healthy. I can
remember how I felt back then. I know it sounds cliche, but I
can remember a time when I was happy. Proud. When life was a
joy. It was taken from me, and my only goal to get it back.
Nothing else matters, except to feel happy again. I feel we
share a common goal, and I hope we can continue to help each
other.
It is okay to be afraid of treatment. I was too. I thought
maybe I was going to break something inside my head. After all,
it's a weird thing to stick a balloon up your nose and inflate
it! The key is to take it slow. Don't do anything you are
uncomfortable with. Push yourself, but push gently. Positive
results will gradually build your confidence.
My experience with breathing was like yours. Initially I would
try holding my breath, but would sometimes still end up gagging.
And gagging isn't good of course, and may make you averse to
treatment.
I have found expanding until I hear the "cracking" is what works
for me. This occurs before the balloon reaches my throat and
gags me. For a while I was trying to inflate to the maximum
(ie. until gagging), but this was hard as my body didn't want me
to gag it. I also started popping large finger cots, which
while not harmful is still not a pleasant experience. I also
found no additional benefits to expanding beyond the "cracking".
And yes, avoiding gagging has gotten easier as treatment
progresses. I don't really hold my breath anymore. I find
during treatment my mouth is open and I breath through my mouth,
as if I had my nose plugged (which I do, I guess). This is
nothing conscious, it is just what comes naturally during
treatment.
After reading your questions I actually went and treated, to pay
extra attention to what I was doing so I could explain it to
you. I found I cannot really seem to make myself gag anymore.
I am more worried about popping the balloon than I am about
gagging! The balloon goes through my turbinate now much easier
than in the beginning. Basically I just pick a turbinate, stick
the balloon in, inflate gently until it squeezes through the
turbinate, then give it a few good pumps until my ears pop (then
usually don't pop simultaneously). Then I may inflate a few
more times to see if there is anymore cracking (usually there
isn't and these extra pumps don't accomplish anything). Then I
deflate and repeat usually ~4 times. Then I move to the
opposite turbinate and repeat. I usually treat all turbinates,
unless my body tells me to stop (this had happened a few times
after a lot of cracking. Things feel a bit too sensitive).
During this particular treatment, I started top right. Next
came top left, middle right, middle left. When I got to bottom
right, I experienced significant cracking in my right ear.
"Cracking" actually feels like the wrong word. It feels like
shifting. Like tectonic plates shifting. It's a bit shocking
when it happens, and makes you feel a bit sensitive. It's also
sometimes higher pitched, like squeaking. Anyways, after a few
inflation's it stopped. Finally I treated the bottom left, but
things were now feeling a bit sensitive, so I just did a few
inflation's to end treatment.
Post-treatment I always feel fine now. Maybe a bit of fatigue
later in the day. If I touch my skull (like run my hands
through my hair) things feel a bit sensitive, but that's it.
This is why I have been somewhat aggressive with multiple
treatments in a day. If I feel like it later today, I will
treat again.
A couple more things. I find exercising before treatments helps
prepare or "loosen up" the body. Today I worked out
before-hand, and feel it helped. I think anything that raises
your heart rate should work though. This isn't a necessity of
course, but may help increase results.
Also, in my posts I have described feeling "sensations" in limbs
and extremities etc. (arms, legs, feet and hands mostly). The
feeling is like an insect crawling on you. It only lasts an
instant. I have experienced this during and post treatment.
Just something to look for.
And finally, remember that my experiences with NCR may be
completely different from yours. Everything I have just said is
true for me, but may not be true for you. You're going to have
to figure this out for yourself. Experience is the only true
teacher.
Best of luck Tyler!
#Post#: 295--------------------------------------------------
Re: Walrus' Self-NCR Diary
DIR By: Walrus
Date: June 17, 2013, 6:31 pm
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Just thought I should make a final update.
My treatments continue to go well, and I plan on continuing NCR
for life. I usually treat most days and experience no PT
symptoms. Progress has become very gradual but is still
consistent. Treating takes so little time and effort it has
quite simply become habit (like brushing my teeth).
I now combine my treatments with face-pulling, which I also plan
to continue for life. See the "Face Pulling Experiences"
threads to find my method.
Best of luck to all those attempting self-NCR! I hope this
diary can help you overcome the initial discomfort that
accompanies treatment.
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