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       #Post#: 2023--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Diagnose my face - pics included!
   DIR By: Tyler
       Date: May 3, 2017, 2:53 am
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       Actually, tonight I really agree with you, about what you were
       writing.
       I just didn't want it to go so far that people reject their own
       faces ...
       But, actually the more that I develop, I begin to feel like my
       actual inner nature is showing more in my outer appearance. I've
       always felt like a bit of a fighter inside, but looked so weak
       growing up that I assumed I was born to be a dweeb.
       I didn't mean to take away from your progress by bringing that
       other stuff up.. and, I don't like those "red pill" sites. Me, I
       just feel excited to see what my end-development self looks
       like. Then I plan to go from there.
       I guess you guys feel more like the same as me, eh?
       #Post#: 2024--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Diagnose my face - pics included!
   DIR By: InferiorerThanYou
       Date: May 3, 2017, 4:42 am
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       I've had similar thoughts as PaperBag, especially since my
       spiritual endeavors lasted around 5 grueling years of looking
       for answers day in and day out and coming out with nothing. The
       reason why myself or anybody goes into spirituality or any other
       form of self improvement is out of a feeling of not being good
       enough. The same thing of course applies to trying to improve
       your looks, which is fine, because I am not satisfied with how I
       look either; I have cranial dystrophy as well and the past year
       or so of gorging on articles and videos about it have made me
       hyper aware of it. However, at the same time, I know that what I
       am chasing is an imaginary benchmark of being "good enough"
       (whatever that means). I know that even if I got the perfect
       face, that that wouldn't really solve the problem. I don't even
       know why I don't feel good enough; I guess the large majority of
       people who feel this way don't know either, but everyone goes on
       trying to fill the hole or prove the idea wrong.
       Maybe there are some people out there who have gotten somewhere
       by wrestling with the problem, but I personally have never seen
       any; I've seen people who act like they're getting better due to
       getting really good at ignoring their thoughts/problems or
       whether or not some new method seems to be going well for them,
       but they eventually revert back to feeling like they did before
       - the same has been true for me. Personally, I don't see any
       point in trying to prove anything wrong or try and fix anything,
       because it's been proven repeatedly that there's no winning.
       When you look at the rare person who genuinely feels good about
       themselves, you'll see that it's effortless and they're not
       fighting with their ideas in order to feel a certain way. If you
       really loved yourself, you wouldn't need to convince yourself of
       it; in fact, the opposite of loving yourself wouldn't mean
       anything to you. In quite a few celebrities with a troubled
       past, you can see them post on Twitter/Instagram, etc. empty
       quotes on how they're getting better or how much they like
       themselves, etc. but you can tell it's incredibly hollow.
       I often think that getting more external attention about looking
       good would make me feel better, even though it wouldn't; I've
       been told I look good quite a few times, but I still think I'm
       hideous. I find it odd how there are a fair amount of people who
       are unattractive and don't seem to care about it, it's just like
       "Yeah, I'm ugly as hell!" - even though I don't understand the
       people who don't want to improve their sub-par looks, I think it
       serves as a good example on how they are not fighting a battle
       about it and so they are at peace. To me, trying to change how
       you feel about anything is just reinforcing the idea of "I am
       someone who needs fixing" and so you'll never arrive.
       Even if my face changes, I have no hope that I will feel
       attractive or stop feeling depressed, etc. because the idea that
       I can feel something I am not feeling right now/naturally is
       just fantasizing. Since I feel all these negative things
       naturally, these things are true to me and trying to get rid of
       them is kind of silly, because trying to feel "different" is
       just covering up the negativity that's already there. I don't
       even mean to say all this as another game of "If I pretend to
       not change, then I will be given what these teachers have
       promised", it's just more so a matter of seeing the way things
       are.
       By the way, this has nothing to do with discouraging trying to
       fix your appearance, since I will be continuing to do all that I
       can, it's just stopping trying to change how you feel about
       yourself, because unless it's a natural feeling, it's just you
       at war with yourself.
       #Post#: 2025--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Diagnose my face - pics included!
   DIR By: Tyler
       Date: May 3, 2017, 5:25 am
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       Hi there, new person. Sorry about your name pick, but I won't
       call you by that name, or myself for that matter.
       Actually, I want to try and .. say something to you about that
       (the depression) here, although it would be easier to offer you
       some relevant text. You haven't requested that, though, so I
       really can't point you in any direction, even if it is very
       relevant and may answer quite many of your probing questions.
       Actually, I have information about some relevant text that could
       answer many of your probing questions as well, lady with the
       paper bag over her head, but you haven't asked about that
       either.
       I can offer you this, though - my own experience, which perhaps
       you will find to be different than what you've encountered to
       date.
       I fought depression myself for a long time, and ... some days, I
       still do in fact. But actually, I eat more green vegetables
       today, and drink milk for the energy, and explore the use of
       herbs for curiosity and excitement over what potential
       salubrious effect they might have on me. I don't live in any
       kind of bliss or Nirvana, but my existence is ... well,
       satisfactory to me.
       I suppose I had tried to touch on the subject in some earlier
       posts, that in the viewpoint that I have accumulated now, I
       would say that there is a difference between wishing to be
       somebody we aren't, and so wishing to have the beauty of
       somebody else, and then simply developing into the best possible
       version of ourselves ... Obviously, I cannot say what your
       nature is, but, for me anyway, the actual striving in order to
       develop into my own best appearance is satisfying, because as I
       improve my beauty, my vitality, my nourishment, and also am
       learning skills along the way to help me do that, then the whole
       thing makes me .. actually a bit optimistic, and I just think
       about who I might be when it's all been done to completion.
       I look .. at my own face now and then, after I have made a bit
       of progress, and try hard to imagine what I would look like, if
       I had more vitality, more life in the eyes, warmer skin, and so
       looked like the best, most beautiful version of myself ... And
       then, I try to make those things come true, either by taking in
       more nourishment, or by getting outside for a walk in nature, or
       sometimes by even forming the basic volition to think a nice
       sentiment about myself instead of the usual self-loathing and
       lies, and yes I'm also trying to put the adjustment on my bone
       structure with these gentle applied forces ... all because the
       whole, greater thing ... even almost a spiritual thing ... calls
       me to hold my thoughts in the cognition of what might be,
       instead of bemoaning what is.
       .... although, I have to *recognise* reality before I can begin
       to make positive improvements, that is true. But ... I would say
       to anyone ... that they don't only have to think about the
       negative reality, because they can also uplift themselves with
       the positive idea of what could be.
       ....
       If I may say to sum up ... it's good to dream, and not be
       defeated by the harsh reality all too often. Although, it's
       possible that these forums are weighing too heavily on one
       aspect, the boney aspect of beauty, and neglecting that ..
       nourishment, nature, fresh air ... and even dreaming a dream of
       absolutely anything at all, to uplift the mood a bit ... all
       play a role in shaping true beauty eventually. And, of course it
       takes patience ..
       I hope this all helps :) .. Salome
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