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#Post#: 23194--------------------------------------------------
Group text invite
DIR By: kidsandme
Date: January 3, 2019, 6:55 pm
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Do you reply yes or no to a group text / email that is inviting
you to an outing?
Laura sent out a text to her group of friends letting them know
that her and Dan are going to wine tasting at x place at y time,
and to for anyone to come to winery at y time if they like.
Everyone in the group are avid fans of wine tastings.
Would you respond to something like this? Yes if you were going
or no if you were not.
If you were replying no, would you give a reason why you can't
attend.
#Post#: 23198--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: Rain
Date: January 3, 2019, 7:52 pm
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I would respond in a pm....but that's just me
I (personally) hate getting group responses
#Post#: 23202--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: TootsNYC
Date: January 3, 2019, 8:14 pm
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I would respond, but I also would use a direct communication of
some sort instead of a group text.
And if I knew whether I was going to be there or not, I would
indeed let them know.
But I wouldn't feel obligated to give them any excuses--I'd just
say, "I won't be able to make it." And if I wanted them to alert
me on their next trip, or if I wanted to see them, or if I
missed them lately, I'd mention that perhaps.
But I wouldn't feel I needed to give any specific reason.
#Post#: 23207--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: Hmmm
Date: January 3, 2019, 8:48 pm
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My response would be based on how many people were in the text.
For instance, if it was 2 or 3 other couples who normally do
tastings together, I'd probably respond to everyone. But if it
was 10 or more people, I'd send my reply just to the one
person.
But also, if she sent the text out to 20 or more people I
probably would only reply to her if I was planning to go.
Because to me that is more of a general announcement and not an
actual invitation needing a response.
#Post#: 23229--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: guest657
Date: January 3, 2019, 11:55 pm
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--- Quote from: Hmmm link ---
>
> My response would be based on how many people were in the
text. For instance, if it was 2 or 3 other couples who normally
do tastings together, I'd probably respond to everyone. But if
it was 10 or more people, I'd send my reply just to the one
person.
>
> But also, if she sent the text out to 20 or more people I
probably would only reply to her if I was planning to go.
Because to me that is more of a general announcement and not an
actual invitation needing a response.
>
--- End Quote ---
This is a good description of how I'd handle it.
And I wouldn't feel any need to give a reason. Just "Can't make
it, y'all have fun!"
#Post#: 23244--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: lowspark
Date: January 4, 2019, 8:48 am
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I'd probably go ahead and reply either way. And I'd sign my name
if there were people in the group who weren't on my contacts
list.
If I couldn't go, I'd probably just give "previous plans" as the
reason.
I know that some people hate being on a large group text where
there are texts flying back and forth. But that's on the person
who started the text and included them. Those people can always
just remove themselves from the conversation.
#Post#: 23254--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: DaDancingPsych
Date: January 4, 2019, 10:06 am
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I was just considering to ask a similar question.
I no longer respond to group texts through the original message
and here is why...
My friend Spence invited a group to a BBQ. This group of friends
have known each other since high school with really only the
addition of spouses (who have been around for years, too), so
they are tight knit and all know each other. I am an outsider to
this group and would define my relationship with all as causal
acquaintances (except with Spence; we are friends.) They all
have been friendly to me, but it has been difficult breaking
into the group because of their history. I do not have anyone's
number, so when they respond to group texts, I have no clue who
is "speaking".
The text conversation:
Spence (to all): BBQ on Saturday! Blah, blah, blah, details.
Unknown Number 1: Great! We will be there.
Unknown Number 2: Bummer, we will be out of the town.
Unknown Number 3: We'll bring my famous bean dip.
Me: Thank you for thinking of me, but I am unavailable. Enjoy!
Unknown Number 1: (only to me): Who is this?
Me: Oh, I'm sorry. I am Spence's friend Da.
Unknown Number 1: I don't know why you are messaging me.
Me: Sorry, I was attempting to RSVP to Spence's party and did
not mean to bother you. May I ask who I am messaging?
Silence.
To this day, I have no idea who this person was. To me, the tone
was abrupt and unfriendly (although, despite my paraphrasing the
incident, there is room for other interpretations.) The exchange
upset me a bit. Being that I was not attending the party, I
could not really try to bring it up there to find the person and
apologize (or get a feel for the person's intentions.) At the
time, I decided to not mention it to Spence.
Spence still does group invites (they are the norm for this
group), but I always respond outside of the group message. I
know how annoying it is to receive ten responses from unknown
numbers and it apparently bothers others that they don't know
me. It has soured my desire to want to break into this group,
which I do not think was going to happen anyways.
So... I do not know if it is rude to respond to group texts, but
I no longer do so.
#Post#: 23260--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: Luci
Date: January 4, 2019, 10:34 am
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One never needs to give a reason for not attending an event.
I respond with "We are unable to attend. Thank you for inviting
us." For a casual party or invitation as in the OP, I would say,
"Sorry! Can’t make it." to the host only.
#Post#: 23266--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: Bada
Date: January 4, 2019, 10:49 am
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My phone used to break up group text messages. So I could send
to a group, or get a message to a group. But then each reply
would start a new and totally separate text thread. It wouldn't
show it as related to the original thread at all. It was super
annoying and I could never figure out how to change it. But it
made these group text situations really, really annoying for me.
So I'd have been forced to reply separately. I still would for a
large group because I hate being spammed by 100 responses.
I wonder if this is what happened to DaDancing. Maybe Person 1
got a text separated from the original chain like my phone used
to do. It wouldn't explain away the end part (ignoring the
question by Da of "who are you") but it explains the initial
confusion of wondering why they were getting texts from a
stranger.
#Post#: 23274--------------------------------------------------
Re: Group text invite
DIR By: lowspark
Date: January 4, 2019, 11:23 am
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--- Quote from: Bada link ---
>
> My phone used to break up group text messages. So I could send
to a group, or get a message to a group. But then each reply
would start a new and totally separate text thread. It wouldn't
show it as related to the original thread at all. It was super
annoying and I could never figure out how to change it. But it
made these group text situations really, really annoying for me.
So I'd have been forced to reply separately. I still would for a
large group because I hate being spammed by 100 responses.
>
> I wonder if this is what happened to DaDancing. Maybe Person 1
got a text separated from the original chain like my phone used
to do. It wouldn't explain away the end part (ignoring the
question by Da of "who are you") but it explains the initial
confusion of wondering why they were getting texts from a
stranger.
>
--- End Quote ---
Yeah, I used to have that issue as well (quite a while ago) and
I'm guessing that's what happened to DaDancing. I don't think
that really happens anymore.
As far as people not knowing who I am when I reply, that's why,
if there are people in the group who are not in my contacts
list, I end with saying "This is lowspark." Some people follow
suit, others don't. Sometimes someone will say, "who is phone
number 3493", quoting the last four digits of the unknown
person. Then either 3493 will reply, "this is Mary" or someone
else will reply for Mary. Or not. ::)
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