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       #Post#: 16262--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: Rose Red Date: October 16, 2018, 8:56 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16174#msg16174
       date=1539622447]
       This is just wild and really unfortunate.  I would applaud
       either one for their behavior.  I understand the photographer's
       frustration but believe she could have handled this better.  For
       me, a specific picture would not be more important than...people
       not becoming physical with one another at my wedding.
       [/quote]
       How could she have handled it better after asking politely
       several times for stepmother not to block her? She can't very
       well interrupt the HC or even a guest to have them control her.
       It's not about a specific picture. It sounds like stepmother was
       going out of her way to ruin/block any pictures the photographer
       took. The HC may end up with very little or even nothing.
       Yes normally pictures are not more important than people. But
       we're not talking about normal behavior. Sadly people don't
       always have your best interest and there's a reason why people
       joke about "step-monsters."
       #Post#: 16268--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: October 16, 2018, 10:28 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Hmmm link=topic=728.msg15973#msg15973
       date=1539355665]
       And just no... trying to have assault charges filed would just
       be more maliciousness on the part of the SM. And would be
       abusing our court system and tax payer funds. [quote] I am no
       lawyer (nor am I interested to get into a discussion), but I
       would assume that there is a case there for assault. I
       completely understand the frustration... I am just not
       comfortable with the level of physical contact.[/quote]
       [/quote]
       To be clear, I was not suggesting that the step mom file
       charges. Just that I thought that the "bump" was extreme
       (possibly assault level extreme.) I am team bride/photographer,
       but I am also not comfortable condoning this level of violence.
       I would think etiquette would say the same. What else could the
       photographer do? I am not sure. It appears to me that this woman
       WANTED to ruin the photos, but we cannot control others'
       behaviors (only our own reactions.) I completely understand why
       the photographer resorted to this, but I wish I could come up
       with a better solutions. (Maybe dad should dump this creature
       and find himself a woman who wants to love his children?)
       #Post#: 16278--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: Hanna Date: October 16, 2018, 11:10 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Rose Red link=topic=728.msg16262#msg16262
       date=1539698197]
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16174#msg16174
       date=1539622447]
       This is just wild and really unfortunate.  I would applaud
       either one for their behavior.  I understand the photographer's
       frustration but believe she could have handled this better.  For
       me, a specific picture would not be more important than...people
       not becoming physical with one another at my wedding.
       [/quote]
       How could she have handled it better after asking politely
       several times for stepmother not to block her? She can't very
       well interrupt the HC or even a guest to have them control her.
       It's not about a specific picture. It sounds like stepmother was
       going out of her way to ruin/block any pictures the photographer
       took. The HC may end up with very little or even nothing.
       [/quote]
       If it's not about the specific picture she should have just done
       the best she could with this one shot, then found the
       coordinator or a family member and gotten help to keep this from
       continuing.  That was the end of the ceremony, I guess,  so they
       would be moving into reception or wedding party photo mode next,
       leaving time to seek help to address the problem.
       If it was about the picture and that was the only acceptable,
       then I guess she feels justified that there was no alternative.
       A scene like this in front of everyone at a wedding can really
       mar the day. I'm glad the Bride and Groom do not feel that way,
       but in her shoes if I noticed this it would have caused me a
       great deal of distress.
       I agree that the stepmother behaved terribly. I just believe
       physicality like that is only ok to prevent a safety issue.  I'm
       sure the bride and groom will never look at that shot and fail
       to remember what was going on, so the picture is ruined any way.
       #Post#: 16287--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: Chez Miriam Date: October 16, 2018, 12:16 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16278#msg16278
       date=1539706251]
       I agree that the stepmother behaved terribly. I just believe
       physicality like that is only ok to prevent a safety issue.  I'm
       sure the bride and groom will never look at that shot and fail
       to remember what was going on, so the picture is ruined any way.
       [/quote]
       It's also possible that they see it as "the time stepmom got her
       comeuppance" and it brings a smile to their faces?
       I wouldn't like to handle myself that way, but it sounds as
       though the stepmother was giving plenty of warnings that she was
       (repeatedly) stepping over the line.
       #Post#: 16310--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: TeamBhakta Date: October 16, 2018, 3:12 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Mary Sunshine Rain
       link=topic=728.msg15905#msg15905 date=1539273878]
       And how are there men who are so stupid as to allow their wives
       to try and ruin their daughter's wedding?  Why did he not
       intervene?  Especially since she was repeatedly doing it.  He
       could have at least gotten her phone away from her.
       [/quote]
       He's probably someone who doesn't listen when others say "Don't
       [play scrabble with] crazy" ::)
       #Post#: 16414--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: lmyrs Date: October 17, 2018, 12:55 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16278#msg16278
       date=1539706251]
       [quote author=Rose Red link=topic=728.msg16262#msg16262
       date=1539698197]
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16174#msg16174
       date=1539622447]
       This is just wild and really unfortunate.  I would applaud
       either one for their behavior.  I understand the photographer's
       frustration but believe she could have handled this better.  For
       me, a specific picture would not be more important than...people
       not becoming physical with one another at my wedding.
       [/quote]
       How could she have handled it better after asking politely
       several times for stepmother not to block her? She can't very
       well interrupt the HC or even a guest to have them control her.
       It's not about a specific picture. It sounds like stepmother was
       going out of her way to ruin/block any pictures the photographer
       took. The HC may end up with very little or even nothing.
       [/quote]
       If it's not about the specific picture she should have just done
       the best she could with this one shot, then found the
       coordinator or a family member and gotten help to keep this from
       continuing.  That was the end of the ceremony, I guess,  so they
       would be moving into reception or wedding party photo mode next,
       leaving time to seek help to address the problem.
       If it was about the picture and that was the only acceptable,
       then I guess she feels justified that there was no alternative.
       A scene like this in front of everyone at a wedding can really
       mar the day. I'm glad the Bride and Groom do not feel that way,
       but in her shoes if I noticed this it would have caused me a
       great deal of distress.
       I agree that the stepmother behaved terribly. I just believe
       physicality like that is only ok to prevent a safety issue.  I'm
       sure the bride and groom will never look at that shot and fail
       to remember what was going on, so the picture is ruined any way.
       [/quote]
       Reading media from the bride indicates the opposite. She's
       grateful to the photographer. She know that the photographer and
       multiple guests had told SM to stop interfering with the
       photographer. The SM got what she asked for.
       #Post#: 16417--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The "Grand Shoulder Bump!"
       By: Hanna Date: October 17, 2018, 1:18 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=lmyrs link=topic=728.msg16414#msg16414
       date=1539798922]
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16278#msg16278
       date=1539706251]
       [quote author=Rose Red link=topic=728.msg16262#msg16262
       date=1539698197]
       [quote author=Hanna link=topic=728.msg16174#msg16174
       date=1539622447]
       This is just wild and really unfortunate.  I would applaud
       either one for their behavior.  I understand the photographer's
       frustration but believe she could have handled this better.  For
       me, a specific picture would not be more important than...people
       not becoming physical with one another at my wedding.
       [/quote]
       How could she have handled it better after asking politely
       several times for stepmother not to block her? She can't very
       well interrupt the HC or even a guest to have them control her.
       It's not about a specific picture. It sounds like stepmother was
       going out of her way to ruin/block any pictures the photographer
       took. The HC may end up with very little or even nothing.
       [/quote]
       If it's not about the specific picture she should have just done
       the best she could with this one shot, then found the
       coordinator or a family member and gotten help to keep this from
       continuing.  That was the end of the ceremony, I guess,  so they
       would be moving into reception or wedding party photo mode next,
       leaving time to seek help to address the problem.
       If it was about the picture and that was the only acceptable,
       then I guess she feels justified that there was no alternative.
       A scene like this in front of everyone at a wedding can really
       mar the day. I'm glad the Bride and Groom do not feel that way,
       but in her shoes if I noticed this it would have caused me a
       great deal of distress.
       I agree that the stepmother behaved terribly. I just believe
       physicality like that is only ok to prevent a safety issue.  I'm
       sure the bride and groom will never look at that shot and fail
       to remember what was going on, so the picture is ruined any way.
       [/quote]
       Reading media from the bride indicates the opposite. She's
       grateful to the photographer. She know that the photographer and
       multiple guests had told SM to stop interfering with the
       photographer. The SM got what she asked for.
       [/quote]
       I guess. And honestly it’s fascinating to gawk at other people’s
       drama.
       But from an etiquette and a family standpoint the whole thing is
       a shame.
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