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Bad Manners and Brimstone
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#Post#: 14310--------------------------------------------------
"BIG legs."
By: Writer of Wrongs Date: September 21, 2018, 12:03 pm
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That's what a woman said behind my back this week.
I had to drop off an item at a particular office. One woman was
seated at her desk; another was pulled up to the side of the
desk, chatting. (They may have been training on something, but
the conversation when I walked in sounded like it was just a
lunchtime visit.)
We exchanged friendly greetings as I made my delivery, and then
I turned to leave. As I walked out the door, I heard the woman
at the side of the desk say either "Look at her big legs" or
"She's got big legs" - I don't remember which, but it was
definitely a reference to a woman's big legs - heavy emphasis on
the BIG.
I turned around when she started speaking, because I thought for
a second she was speaking to me. She did this big smile and
said, "Oh, we were saying how nice you look and how well
put-together you are. I like that."
::) ::) ::)
That is absolutely NOT what she had said, nor could her words
have been a compliment in any context. My first thought was to
call her out on the blatant lie, but I was on the clock,
representing a public official. So I gave her my best fake smile
and said breezily, "Ah. Thank you. Have a great day!" and left.
Yep, I'm a bigger woman. I'm not particularly bothered by her
thinking I have large legs, because that's a fact, Jack. But
wow.
#Post#: 14315--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: Thitpualso Date: September 21, 2018, 12:55 pm
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Nope. Not right for anywhere let alone the workplace.
The only comment you ever make about another person’s appearance
is a compliment such as, ‘I like your socks.’ or, ‘that color
blouse really looks good on you.’
We can all think what we want but common civility requires that
we treat each other kindly. People who denigrate others for
body shape only do so to make themselves feel better about the
shortcomings they perceive in themselves.
#Post#: 14318--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: NFPwife Date: September 21, 2018, 2:15 pm
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writerofwrongs - I was so angry on your behalf I had to walk
away from the keyboard before replying!!
I'm so sorry. That was unacceptable on every level.
Good for you for letting them know you heard them. (I was
hoping, beyond hope, that "big legs" was a compliment - you
know, like in the old Morris Day song "Fishnet." It obviously
wasn't and, again, I'm sorry.)
#Post#: 14319--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: BeagleMommy Date: September 21, 2018, 2:17 pm
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I would have been so tempted to turn around and say "Meow".
Good for you for not taking their bait. You remained
professional and I hope they were embarrassed at being caught in
their cattiness.
#Post#: 14343--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: Hello Ducky Date: September 21, 2018, 8:07 pm
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I had a similar experience years ago. I'd fallen and landed on
my knees, cracking a kneecap in the process. Went to the
emergency room and the attending came in (probably an intern or
resident, he wasn't much more than 25-26) and the first thing he
said to me was "WOW that's a big leg!" :o :o ??? :'( :'( :o
>:( >:( >:(
It was very difficult not to call him Dr. Obvious. I'm almost
surprised I didn't end up with a fractured jaw from it hitting
the floor.
#Post#: 14354--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: Lula Date: September 22, 2018, 9:00 am
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"All the better to kick your barn-raised ass, my dear."
OK, maybe not.
#Post#: 14357--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: Lula Date: September 22, 2018, 9:09 am
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My real suggestion is to say "thank you," because screw the
notion that big = bad already.
Or even just a completely neutral, "Yeah, I do." These people
deserve the full brunt of the awkwardness they create.
#Post#: 14387--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: lakey Date: September 22, 2018, 11:08 pm
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It's always easy to come up with a response in hindsight. At the
time something like this happens we are usually so shocked, we
don't know what to say. I think that the best response can be a
blank stare.
Honestly though, this is such unprofessional behavior, you
should pity them. They act like they're still in the middle
school cafeteria.
#Post#: 14396--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: gramma dishes Date: September 23, 2018, 10:55 am
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Better big legs than a big mouth!
#Post#: 14398--------------------------------------------------
Re: "BIG legs."
By: gramma dishes Date: September 23, 2018, 10:56 am
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[quote author=gramma dishes link=topic=699.msg14396#msg14396
date=1537718136]
Better big legs than a big mouth - tiny brain combo!
[/quote]
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