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#Post#: 14294--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: Kimberami Date: September 21, 2018, 8:14 am
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Making your own holiday celebration could be so fun. You could
theme it after the beach or a farm day. I think I might do that
myself. I'd love to have an excuse to have a low country boil or
seafood chowder.
#Post#: 14300--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: Hmmm Date: September 21, 2018, 9:11 am
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My parent's set a good examples for us. Their goal was that no
family member ever celebrated alone. Mom only had one sister and
if that sister couldn't make it to her parents for the holiday,
then we would go. Dad had a very large family so knew his
parents would never be alone. I do remember some years that we'd
leave home early Xmas day, go to my mom's parents, leave mid day
and drive 1.5 hours to my Dad's parents and then head back home
(2 hours) late evening. I thought it was fun but I'm sure it was
exhausting for my mom dealing with 4 kids and doing lot of the
cooking for both events. Later when their parents were deceased,
Mom & Dad would always invite relatives to join us who didn't
have other plans but they never put pressure on anyone to come.
When my much older sisters started leaving home, my parents
never set the expectation that we all had to try and celebrate
together. So one sister might be home for Tday and another for
Xmas or neither might return that year. And that was ok because
they understood they had their own lives and had another side of
the family. So some years for Xmas it might just be me, Mom, Dad
and an aunt, or a cousin, or maybe a family friend. Another
year, Mom, Dad and I might travel to one of my sister's home for
the holiday. I actually enjoyed having the variety.
When DH and I married, his parents and siblings all lived in
town and I had one sister in town. We started hosting most
holidays right after our first child was born. I usually send
out an email around mid-October to all family members asking
about people's plans, if anyone wanted to host Tday or Xmas or
I'll let the family know if DH and I have decided to go out of
town for a holiday to give people enough time to make
alternative plans. Once we get an idea of who plans to be in
town, I'll start coordinating the times that work best for
everyone to be at our house if we are hosting, going for
accommodating the majority. Then I send out the details of date
and time. We've hosted up to 32 and as little as 8. Both are a
lot of fun and I enjoy the variety.
This year is the first time that one of my offspring is in a
serious enough relationship that I can see her deciding to forgo
having a holiday with us. I've already told her that we are fine
with whatever they decide to do. She said right now they are
leaning toward Tday with us then going to his Dad's for the
weekend and then at Xmas, going to his grandparents (his mom's
parents) for Xmas Eve, Xmas day with us and then traveling to
his mom's in another state over the new year. I told her she
might want to reconsider Tday with us since one of my nephews
has a new home and wants to host this year. So now she is
campaigning for me to host Tday at our house on Saturday so that
they can have all of their favorite Tday food.
#Post#: 14326--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: Uncle Rupert Date: September 21, 2018, 4:31 pm
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I have a small family (me, my sister, my sister's daughter and
her husband, and their two children), and I have always hosted
all holidays since my mother passed away. I've always enjoyed
it, but in recent years I've been told that my dinners are too
"fussy" and extravagant and the children, in particular, don't
like it. There was a big blow-up at Easter, and my niece and my
sister have both since made intimations that I shouldn't bother
with Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I have no idea what
they're actually planning to do, and probably wouldn't go even
if they invited me. I can't imagine what horrors I might
encounter.
#Post#: 14331--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: Bada Date: September 21, 2018, 5:22 pm
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[quote author=Uncle Rupert link=topic=691.msg14326#msg14326
date=1537565490]
I have a small family (me, my sister, my sister's daughter and
her husband, and their two children), and I have always hosted
all holidays since my mother passed away. I've always enjoyed
it, but in recent years I've been told that my dinners are too
"fussy" and extravagant and the children, in particular, don't
like it. There was a big blow-up at Easter, and my niece and my
sister have both since made intimations that I shouldn't bother
with Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I have no idea what
they're actually planning to do, and probably wouldn't go even
if they invited me. I can't imagine what horrors I might
encounter.
[/quote]
That's so disappointing! I hope you're able to find some
non-blood related people who love fancy celebrations to make
into your new Holiday Family!
#Post#: 14336--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: gramma dishes Date: September 21, 2018, 6:35 pm
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[quote author=Bada link=topic=691.msg14331#msg14331
date=1537568561]
[quote author=Uncle Rupert link=topic=691.msg14326#msg14326
date=1537565490]
I have a small family (me, my sister, my sister's daughter and
her husband, and their two children), and I have always hosted
all holidays since my mother passed away. I've always enjoyed
it, but in recent years I've been told that my dinners are too
"fussy" and extravagant and the children, in particular, don't
like it. There was a big blow-up at Easter, and my niece and my
sister have both since made intimations that I shouldn't bother
with Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I have no idea what
they're actually planning to do, and probably wouldn't go even
if they invited me. I can't imagine what horrors I might
encounter.
[/quote]
That's so disappointing! I hope you're able to find some
non-blood related people who love fancy celebrations to make
into your new Holiday Family!
[/quote]
Like us! ;D
#Post#: 14344--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: RubyCat Date: September 21, 2018, 8:40 pm
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For a long time, I've been thinking about having a dinner on one
of the weekends sometime around the holiday season. I may not
be able to pull it off this year because of some family members'
schedules (and my own crazy schedule, if I'm being honest). If
it could come together, though, I'd like that. Otherwise, I
might make my plans for a weekend celebration next year very
early. We have certain people in the family that plan things
super early. I'm not one of them (obviously) and it puts me at
a bit of a disadvantage. I may float a few trial balloons over
the next week or so and see what happens.
#Post#: 14428--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: Elle Kruger Date: September 23, 2018, 9:03 pm
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My kids are adults with families of their own. It’s important to
us that they spend Christmas morning in their own homes so their
kids can enjoy Christmas morning at home with Mom and Dad. We
look at everyone’s schedules and decide when we’re doing
Christmas. Sometimes it’s as much as three weeks before Dec 25
or a week or two after. What’s important to me is having
everyone together, not what specific date it happens to be. It
works for us.
#Post#: 14445--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: gramma dishes Date: September 24, 2018, 9:16 am
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[quote author=Elle Kruger link=topic=691.msg14428#msg14428
date=1537754612]
My kids are adults with families of their own. It’s important to
us that they spend Christmas morning in their own homes so their
kids can enjoy Christmas morning at home with Mom and Dad. We
look at everyone’s schedules and decide when we’re doing
Christmas. Sometimes it’s as much as three weeks before Dec 25
or a week or two after. What’s important to me is having
everyone together, not what specific date it happens to be. It
works for us.
[/quote]
We feel the same way. Christmas (or any holiday) is when people
are able to be together and the calendar date doesn't matter at
all. We also agree that children should stay home with their
own core family on Christmas day. We told grandparents that if
they wanted to join us they were always welcome, but we would
NOT be traveling to see them.
On the other hand, some people really love traveling (kids and
all) to other people's homes for Christmas, so whatever works
for a given family is all good.
#Post#: 14446--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: STiG Date: September 24, 2018, 9:31 am
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Last year, we were trying to organize a Christmas gathering with
my group of friends. It didn't matter what date was proposed,
it wasn't good for someone. So the organizer threw up her hands
and proposed a date early in the new year. That worked for
everyone and we had a lovely Christmas dinner in January.
#Post#: 14558--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanksgiving and Christmas arrangements
By: daen Date: September 25, 2018, 8:48 pm
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I'm a fan of Christmas events being moved to January. Time is at
such a premium in the run up to the 25th, and so empty
afterwards, that an event in the first few weeks of January is
doubly enjoyable.
Not that I want to move all Christmas events to January... that
just time-shifts the issue.
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