DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: Weddings
*****************************************************
#Post#: 13775--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: lakey Date: September 14, 2018, 3:56 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
There's an old saying,"better safe than sorry." You made the
right choice. Weather forecasts are inexact. There is no way to
know for sure how damaging the hurricane will be in the area of
the wedding. I understand that this has been very stressful for
the bride. After all the work and money she put into her
wedding, she's left wondering if it will all be a big
disappointment. That being said, none of this is your fault and
she shouldn't have taken it out on you. If she has been a good
friend in the past, I would let things calm down for the time
being, and not make any decisions about the friendship with her.
If, in the future, she reaches out to you, you might decide to
save the friendship. If she continues to blame you for not
attending the wedding, you will have to look at what kind of a
person she is.
For now, try not to let her temper tantrum get to you. You made
a responsible choice.
#Post#: 13988--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: Hanna Date: September 17, 2018, 5:56 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Any word?
#Post#: 14015--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: collakat Date: September 18, 2018, 6:47 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Better safe than sorry. I would've done the same. Hugs
#Post#: 14031--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: NyaChan Date: September 18, 2018, 10:56 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Hanna link=topic=671.msg13988#msg13988
date=1537224998]
Any word?
[/quote]
No, she has not been in contact again since the texts she sent
me. I dont think I should get in touch with her first - it just
doesn’t seem appropriate under the circumstances and those
texts were quite frankly pretty awful. I don’t know how to come
back from that in terms of friendship because it is so beyond
what I think is ok in how to talk to people and as bad as I feel
for missing the wedding, I don’t want to be treated that way.
May be a moot point what I think though. If she really meant
what she said, she is unlikely to speak to me again anyways.
My grandma visited though and she is a little out of it these
days. She asked about the wedding and when I admitted what
happened she goes “Hmmph, well I never liked her!” And so on.
Cracked me up because grandma does not know this person, never
met or spoke to her, I guess she could tell I was upset and
wanted to show support 😌
#Post#: 14032--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: Hanna Date: September 18, 2018, 11:03 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=NyaChan link=topic=671.msg14031#msg14031
date=1537286206]
[quote author=Hanna link=topic=671.msg13988#msg13988
date=1537224998]
Any word?
[/quote]
No, she has not been in contact again since the texts she sent
me. I dont think I should get in touch with her first - it just
doesn’t seem appropriate under the circumstances and those
texts were quite frankly pretty awful. I don’t know how to come
back from that in terms of friendship because it is so beyond
what I think is ok in how to talk to people and as bad as I feel
for missing the wedding, I don’t want to be treated that way.
May be a moot point what I think though. If she really meant
what she said, she is unlikely to speak to me again anyways.
My grandma visited though and she is a little out of it these
days. She asked about the wedding and when I admitted what
happened she goes “Hmmph, well I never liked her!” And so on.
Cracked me up because grandma does not know this person, never
met or spoke to her, I guess she could tell I was upset and
wanted to show support 😌
[/quote]
Your Grandma is awesome!!
I also would not get in touch after receiving messages like
that. I am getting married in June and cannot imagine treating
anyone that way, whatever their reason for missing the wedding.
And I can particularly not understand expecting someone to fly
into uncertain circumstances where a city had been declared in a
state of emergency.
#Post#: 14042--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: Lilac Date: September 18, 2018, 1:36 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I'm sorry it ended as a friendship debacle. You were more than
justified in canceling your trip. The bride's reaction is
inexcusable. (And she did, after all, plan this event for
hurricane season.)
A gracious person would've told you that she would rather have
you safe and home than trekking through a disaster area to get
to her party. If she was left place settings that she had to
pay for (too late to cancel with the caterers) -- well in her
shoes I would've rounded up whoever needed to be fed and asked
them to join in -- maybe there were first responders, or other
volunteers in the area, or just co-workers and neighbors who
didn't make the cut but could fill in for missing guests. I
think people in those circumstances would understand that it was
a "hurricane wedding" and not feel like B-listers. We all know
you can't invite everyone.
The point is that she could've made the best of the
circumstances and chose not to. Not your fault.
#Post#: 14101--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: DCGirl Date: September 19, 2018, 9:56 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I'm sorry to hear that your friend behaved badly; there's never
any excuse for that. While the forecasts changed as the
situation evolved, neither Richmond nor DC (the two airports
cited) nor Charlottesville were impacted by the remnants of
Hurricane Florence until after the wedding had taken place.
That was pretty clear in the forecasts by the middle of last
week -- DH and I were watching carefully because of our plans
for the weekend. Perhaps that factored into her response which,
again, was not acceptable. We saw some clouds on Sunday, but
the real impact of the storms wasn't until Monday afternoon, and
central Virginia (which includes Richmond) saw tornadoes.
#Post#: 14106--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: STiG Date: September 19, 2018, 10:25 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Weather forecasting is far from an exact science; the storm
could easily have shifted. I don't blame the OP at all for not
wanting to take the risk.
Happens here all the time with snow storms and squalls. They'll
be calling for major accumulations and we get nothing. Or
they'll be calling for a couple of centimeters and we get 30.
If there are squalls in the forecast, if it is anything beyond
going to work and back, I don't go unless it is absolutely
necessary.
#Post#: 14107--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: Rose Red Date: September 19, 2018, 10:46 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Yes, weather is unpredictable. Several times, the weather app
says my town is sunny with no rain in the forecast for the next
week while thunderstorms rage right outside. ::)
When there's a hurricane, you don't know what's going on so
better safe than sorry. And your "friend" took out her anger on
you instead of the hurricane and that's nasty. I wouldn't
contact her.
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them." Wise words
from a wise person.
#Post#: 14108--------------------------------------------------
Re: Cancel or take your chances? Bad update #18
By: dani321 Date: September 19, 2018, 10:47 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I live in Florida, and honestly until the last couple of years,
never really got too concerned about hurricanes. However, it's
not just the hurricane itself, there's the traffic (air and
road) to consider when traveling. I think the possibility of
getting stranded somewhere was already brought up here. There
are so many unknowns, that it's not a great idea to travel
anywhere near a storm like that if you don't have to.
I feel bad for the bride, I really do. But she can either make
the best of this situation or make it worse, and we see what she
chose. NyaChan, as others have said here, your safety is the
most important thing; there may not have been much concern about
actually being in the path of the hurricane, and your safety
being compromised in that way, but getting stranded in the
airport and unable to get home, having to rent a car by yourself
when you were planning to have another person with you, those
things impact your safety as well. Not to mention the unexpected
costs. Your friend was being very unreasonable by lashing out at
you so harshly. If you didn't care about her, you would have
declined traveling for her wedding from the beginning. I really
hope that everyone here has helped to confirm that you made the
best choice you could, and you didn't do a thing wrong, this is
all on the bride to be. I hope she comes to her senses and
apologizes to you, life is full of disappointments and having a
hurricane mess up a wedding is just one of hers!
*****************************************************
DIR Previous Page
DIR Next Page