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#Post#: 9611--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: Kiwipinball
Date: July 25, 2018, 11:38 am
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Yeah, it's weird and rude. One of the main points of a potluck
(in addition to sharing the burden of preparing the food) is
that everyone can bring something they like and will eat. My
cousin can't eat dairy (well she can, but then she gets ill so
she wisely doesn't). My aunt threw a potluck party for my
grandpa's birthday. I knew most of what she made would not have
dairy (due to my cousin). I brought cheesy potatoes. My cousin
didn't have any, but also didn't have a fit about it. Nor did my
aunt. My cousin had plenty of choices. I'm super picky and had
some choices (including my potatoes).
#Post#: 9615--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: Rose Red
Date: July 25, 2018, 11:59 am
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There will be two dozen people so I assume there will be at
least two dozen dishes. The two sisters are incredibly rude. And
then the classic gaslighting* by blaming you for being dramatic
and oversensitive.
*Am I using the word gaslighting correctly? ??? Oh well, I don't
care. Those "ladies" are doing something shady.
#Post#: 9616--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: dani321
Date: July 25, 2018, 12:10 pm
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I think your baked beans sound yummy, but even if I didn't, it
would be really rude to tell you, unless maybe you specifically
asked me - even then, using the word "hate" isn't very polite. I
kind of wish you'd go to the potluck and take the baked beans,
and have the dish cleaned out quickly, with guests loudly asking
you for the recipe because it was so good, so that the rude
sister would hear it. I think the sister with the non pork
eating husband could have possibly asked you nicely to make a
portion w/o pork, if her husband would like to try the beans,
since you're family and all - I don't think it would be very
appropriate to ask an acquaintance to do that. But there's not
any excuse for the sister to exclaim she hates them, even if
they were truly terrible, you would probably get the hint when
no one ever ate them, and stop making them.
As far as the potluck, whatever food you bring, I would act
unaffected by the rude comments, and if it was brought up, I
might just blow it off like it was absolutely nothing, because
Sister's opinion on what dish you bring is pretty meaningless,
and I would want to convey that message: that it didn't bother
you at all because it was so silly. (Even if it did bother you
because rudeness is bothersome!)
#Post#: 9617--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: bopper
Date: July 25, 2018, 12:20 pm
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Do you notice that people generally eat your baked beans? If so,
then bring some Cans of vegetarian baked beans for the no=pork
people.
#Post#: 9626--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: BeagleMommy
Date: July 25, 2018, 3:21 pm
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The sisters were rude.
The point of a potluck is to have a variety of foods that the
group can enjoy.
I have a cousin who has food allergies. Other than asking if a
dish is made with nuts so he can avoid it he never makes a big
deal of it. I also have an aunt who only knows how to make one
thing: she calls it ambrosia (canned fruit cocktail, non-dairy
whipped topping, and sweetened coconut). It is cloyingly sweet
and no one except small children like it. We never tell her
that we don't like it. She brings it and takes home the
leftovers (or we dispose of them when she leaves).
#Post#: 9665--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: guest725
Date: July 25, 2018, 8:30 pm
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This was just 2 people? At most I would have replied that it's a
good thing there's lots of other sides to enjoy.
#Post#: 9686--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: Aleko
Date: July 26, 2018, 4:30 am
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I'm still unclear who exactly it was who told you to "make
something else"; you just said it wasn't the hostess.
In any case, in a party of two dozen people it's so obviously
absurd to refrain from bringing something for the buffet because
two people won't eat it, that my reply to both sisters would be
a breezy "Well, nobody will make you/your husband eat it, and I
know other people will like it". If either of them responded to
that by saying "No! Make something else!" I'd just say "There
will be plenty of things there that you/your husband can eat,
and there's no way on earth that every single dish in any buffet
could suit the taste of every one of two dozen people. Don't be
so silly." And I'd make and bring my beans.
#Post#: 9691--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: Venus193
Date: July 26, 2018, 5:31 am
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Once upon a time I asked the question about whether bringing
something the hostess didn't like but other people did and most
replies said that was perfectly OK. The OP's sisters are
playing mind games.
#Post#: 9837--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: LifeOnPluto
Date: July 27, 2018, 11:05 pm
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The two sisters were definitely rude - especially Sister No.2. I
mean, who the heck tells someone publicly that they "hate"
someone's cooking?!
Aside from the Two Unpleasant Sisters, do you want to attend
this pot luck, OP? If so, attend! And ignore those two. And
bring your baked beans and pork dish (which sounds awesome, by
the way!).
#Post#: 9912--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pot Luck planning etiquette
DIR By: oogyda
Date: July 29, 2018, 8:49 am
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I hope you've decided to attend the potluck. And I desperately
hope you brought your baked beans with pork.
Recognize these two for what they are....mean girl bullies.
Seriously don't let them get to you. Hard to achieve, I know.
What they say doesn't matter because they don't matter.
If you can manage it, a cut direct may be quite suitable in this
instance.
Please let us know how it goes or if you decided not to attend.
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