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#Post#: 79447--------------------------------------------------
Rudeness at a concert?
By: IWish Date: June 8, 2023, 8:50 am
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I would like your opinion on whether this was rude or whether
I'm just a grumpy old person. I went to a small concert last
week. The room was the size of a ballroom and seating was at
round tables for 6 people each. A smallish stage was at the
front. The front tables (VIP) were several feet from the stage,
so no room for dancing or SRO. There was food and bar service at
the back of the room so people were up and about during the
actual concert for drinks, bathroom, etc. It was not a formal
event. Mostly adults but also a few families with children.
There were about 150 people total, from the same charitable
organization. So, many people knew each other.
At one point during the first set, one woman with a 2-3 year old
child brought the child up to the very front by the stage and
stood between two of the VIP tables. That wouldn't have been bad
IMO if it would have only been for a quick look-see and they
returned to their table. But the child was enthralled by the
performer and started to dance. About 20 people (maybe
family/friends) thought it was cute and then all left there
seats to gather around and take pictures. Now the whole audience
was focused on her. The performer acknowledged her and started
to sing in her direction.
Where I think it gets rude is that the woman would not leave.
She was crouched down between the tables, taking pictures and
encouraging her daughter to dance. Almost like a stage mother
who is doing dance moves from the side of the stage. She
obviously thought it was adorable. She was not blocking anyone's
view per se. Where I question the rudeness is that she stayed
there for 45 minutes. The performer was clearly uneasy as the
attention was no longer fully on him and it seemed he was afraid
to just ignore her since other people seemed to think she was so
cute. There was an intermission and when the 2nd set started she
came back again.
After the event I saw some pictures that showed the girl
actually laying on the edge of the stage watching. This
performer is very energetic, dancing around the stage and this
clearly hampered his movements on the small stage. I know that
part was rude (and dangerous). Why I am wondering if I'm just
being grumpy is that the pictures posted on the event site with
the toddler dancing and laying on the stage were all accompanied
by comments such as "Performer's greatest fan!" and "So cute!"
etc. Apparently I was the only one who thought it was rude to
the performer and also to the people in the VIP tables who had a
dancing toddler a foot from them and a crouched down mother
gesticulating in between their seats for over an hour. Opinions?
#Post#: 79448--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: Hmmm Date: June 8, 2023, 9:09 am
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Save me a seat on the grumpy couch because I would have found
this annoying too.
I have always felt there is a huge difference in how kids and
parents should behave when at a performance for kids versus with
kids. Being young doesn't give the child and her mother special
perks. There performer was there to entertain all concert goers
who had paid to see the performer. The other 130 didn't attend
to see a little girl dance around. After one song, the mom and
child should have returned to their seats.
#Post#: 79449--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: DaDancingPsych Date: June 8, 2023, 10:41 am
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I'm not feeling grumpy (today) and I agree that it was rude.
This reminds me of when an artist brings up someone from the
audience to sing them a song. ONE song. The attention and focus
may be on that individual for one tune and then they are sent
back to their seat for the remainder of the concert. If this
mother had went up to the stage for one song, then that might be
ok (but I'm still really not a fan of the idea). But after they
have had their moment to experience things up close, it's time
to return to your table. If they wanted to be closer then they
should have paid for a VIP table. (I will say that even if they
had come from one of the closer tables, it still wouldn't be ok
for the child to be stealing the spotlight like that.) It's
really too bad that the event site didn't recognize the issue.
#Post#: 79450--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: Aleko Date: June 8, 2023, 12:01 pm
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Mr Bennet of Pride & Prejudice is also with you: “That will do
extremely well, child. You have delighted us long enough. Let
the other young ladies have time to exhibit.”
#Post#: 79451--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: oogyda Date: June 8, 2023, 12:27 pm
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[quote author=Aleko link=topic=2508.msg79450#msg79450
date=1686243705]
Mr Bennet of Pride & Prejudice is also with you: “That will do
extremely well, child. You have delighted us long enough. Let
the other young ladies have time to exhibit.”
[/quote]
What a gracious way of saying "Enough's enough!"
#Post#: 79464--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: LifeOnPluto Date: June 10, 2023, 2:16 am
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[quote author=oogyda link=topic=2508.msg79451#msg79451
date=1686245256]
[quote author=Aleko link=topic=2508.msg79450#msg79450
date=1686243705]
Mr Bennet of Pride & Prejudice is also with you: “That will do
extremely well, child. You have delighted us long enough. Let
the other young ladies have time to exhibit.”
[/quote]
What a gracious way of saying "Enough's enough!"
[/quote]
That was Mary, wasn't it? Poor Mary... can't say I blame Mr
Bennet though.
On topic, I would have found this rude and annoying too. Coming
up for a closer look, fine. Dancing for a song or two, fine. But
dancing for the rest of the night, no. I can imagine it would
have been awkward for the performer, and distracting for the
patrons sitting in those tables close to the stage.
The mother should have removed the child (and herself) after a
couple of songs. I struggle to comprehend the mindset of parents
like that. Yes, your child is the most adorable thing in the
world, and of course you want them to be happy. But how
blinkered can you be not to realise that other people might not
feel the same way?
#Post#: 79466--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: DaDancingPsych Date: June 10, 2023, 6:09 am
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You may have put together that I enjoy dancing. ??? Over the
years, there have been a few bands who have been wonderful to us
social dancers and we travel to the various venues where they
play. It has become a balancing act of ensuring that we aren't
stealing the spotlight, that we are not annoying those wanting
to just enjoy the music, and most certainly not annoying the
waitstaff (as if they get upset, the band may not get rebooked
and they are out that income!!!)
This also reminds me of weddings. When you have a few dancing
skills, you have to be careful that you don't outshine the bride
and groom. I have a friend who I will not invite as my plus one
anymore. He's a wonderful dancer and a lot of fun to be with,
but he can be a little dense on certain things. He wanted to
dance before the bride and groom had their first dance and I had
to keep declining, reminding him that it would be rude to not
allow them to be first. Then he was so anxious to get on the
dance floor after that, but I insisted that we wait a bit to let
the party really get started. As anticipated, when we finally
did dance, we pulled a lot of attention to ourselves. (It's not
that we were dancing wildly, it's just that we obviously have
some skills.) Many people started watching us and even
applauded. (I have even had the dance floor clear because people
want to watch or feel intimidated.) He wanted to dance a second
one and I declined. We had already caused enough disruption that
it was better to let the party return to it's natural build. I
thought our time was better spent socializing with some of those
who wanted to compliment us (not for the praise, but for the
social reasons) and to dance with them. After some time I agreed
that we could dance together again as the novelty of us had worn
off. It just feels so rude to hijack the party when we are not
meant to be the stars. (My reasoning for not inviting him is
because it's not fun to fight with him to not do this!)
I know that these scenarios are not exactly the same, but they
are times when I find it necessary to really think of others and
not just my own enjoyment.
#Post#: 79484--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: lowspark Date: June 14, 2023, 3:05 pm
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Firmly in the "it was rude" camp.
Let's say for a moment that it was an adult, and not a child,
who decided it was ok to dominate the attention of the crowd by
dancing like that.
That's a definite NO, right?
So then why is it ok for a child? The answer: it's not.
I agree with DaDancingPsych who said, "I'm still really not a
fan of the idea" -- meaning, even one dance was not appropriate.
But ok, we can forgive that. Dominating the entire audience's
attention for such a large chunk of the concert is a definite
no-no.
But here's my question: where was the management? Whoever was
running the event should have intervened. IMO, they are as much
to blame as Doting Mommy because it's within their purview to do
whatever is necessary and reasonable to ensure the enjoyment of
the event by all audience members. They failed.
#Post#: 79498--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: gramma dishes Date: June 18, 2023, 11:29 am
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I'm amazed that the venue allowed it! Sounds like an
opportunity for lawsuit material to happen! Yes, it was
astonishingly rude and I'm very surprised the audience reacted
in such a positive way toward this child and her mother's gross
intrusion.
#Post#: 79500--------------------------------------------------
Re: Rudeness at a concert?
By: Aleko Date: June 19, 2023, 1:29 am
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The whole incident makes me imagine this kid and her mother were
‘Brielle’ and SparklingIce from this thread:
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