DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: Entertaining and Hospitality
*****************************************************
#Post#: 78921--------------------------------------------------
Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: NFPwife Date: March 14, 2023, 6:38 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
My FIL is in a nursing facility with hospice support. Relatives
from out of town are coming in next week and want to see him. I
booked a room at the facility and said, "Let's have a little
lunch so you can see people." I contacted family and have 14
people attending. FIL wants "nothing fancy" and he's been in the
mood for pizza so I'm doing pizza, cupcakes, veggie tray and
drinks.
I'm a little mentally fried from all the administrative and
advocacy things related to FIL's situation, so I'm reaching out
to all of you for all the little "You might want to remember or
include" items. If you've done something similar, I'd love to
hear about it. If you have ideas, I really need those.
For pizza - plan three slices per person?
For drinks - case of water, 2L sodas (diet and reg), cups, ice.
(Should I buy ice or ask the facility? The facility seems to
have a huge icemaker because I see trays of ice out all the
time, but I don't want to ask if that's inappropriate. I'll
offer to pay for it.)
Plates and napkins - should I do a theme? Spring?
Music? Should I set up a playlist with my phone and a Bluetooth
speaker? (Will that impede conversation? A couple people have
hearing loss.)
I was thinking about getting photo albums from the house and
having a little table with them on. Thoughts?
One family member is gluten free and follows an "ethical eating
plan" I was going to get a 1 GF crust pizza is there a nice way
to say "Don't eat this until Cousin Bob has a chance?" Do I have
Cousin Bob eat first? Put it aside and serve him three slices on
a plate? (I ask because I've been places where I see people who
I 100% know are not gluten free take GF items without reserve
because they perceive those as healthier or special.)
Should I plan a fun little game? Like a how well do you know FIL
and have questions from his life that people answer? I thought
that could spark some fun conversation.
Again, any thoughts you have would really help.
#Post#: 78925--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: Aleko Date: March 15, 2023, 4:14 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I would definitely corral the GF pizza till Cousin Bob has been
able to take as much as he wants, whether by stashing it out of
sight or leaving it wrapped and prominently labelled with his
name.
I speak from experience; I used to organise day seminars for
professional people. The booking form I sent them always had a
box for people to state their special dietary requirements, if
any. There would always be a number of requests for kosher
meals, which of course had to be ordered specially - and
expensively - and came wrapped and sealed. I learned that I
needed to get into the lunch room beforehand and put a BIG name
sticker on each of these - because there would always be at
least one Jewish person who hadn’t bothered to fill in that box
but seeing kosher meals would take one, and there wouldn’t be
enough to go round.
#Post#: 78928--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: Rose Red Date: March 15, 2023, 9:05 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Ask the staff ahead of time regarding ice or buy a bag of ice.
At my work, a few people take it all first thing in the morning
or for parties and we all dislike their actions (it takes time
to for the machine to refresh).
Set aside at least 3 pieces of GF for Cousin Bob.
I think spring themed plates and napkins is cheerful which may
be what's needed in a nursing facility.
#Post#: 78933--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: sandisadie Date: March 15, 2023, 10:42 am
---------------------------------------------------------
PVZFAN: What a nice and thoughtful thing for you to do for your
FIL!! I don't have any suggestions but just wanted to say "Go
You"!!
#Post#: 78937--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: TootsNYC Date: March 15, 2023, 11:58 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I wanted to suggest you ask someone at the facility to review
your plan, and ask about ice, but also anything you might've
forgotten, or support they can offer, or tasks they need you to
take care of.
If there's cleanup, directly ask someone else to take care of
it.
If there's anyone helpful in your crowd, ask them to come early
and take care of setup.
Definitely mark the pizza for Bob.
(I will say: as a celiac, I do not eat pizza, not even GF pizza.
There is too much risk of the cheese getting cross-contaminated
by their gloves as they make everyone else's pizza, and I don't
believe they'll use a pristine batch of cheese for mine. The
cooks at one of the diners I went to would go to the basement to
get a completely fresh batch of greens for my salad because they
figured they'd gotten breadcrumbs or flour on the stuff that was
in the kitchen, as they reached into it to make all the other
foods that use it, such as sandwiches, etc.)
#Post#: 78938--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: jpcher Date: March 15, 2023, 3:07 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
What a lovely gift for your FIL!
Here are some thinking points you might want to consider:
Pizza -- Depending on the size of the pizza/slices I'm wondering
if 3 slices per person will be enough . . . but you know your
guests. I would over-order just to be on the safe side. You can
give leftovers to the facility staff/hospice workers to enjoy.
Consider asking the pizza place to double cut the slices
(instead of 6 slices per pie there will be 12 smaller slices)
for lighter eaters.
Will there be a variety of toppings? I suggest keeping the
toppings simple. Maybe 1 cheese, 1 meat (pepperoni and/or
sausage), and 1 veggie.
Drinks -- I think you're fine with water and soda. I would just
bring a bag of ice, without asking the facility. My thinking is
the less you ask of them, the more accommodating they will be.
And ice is easy.
Just a thought (and, again, you know your guests) what about
coffee or hot water for tea? You can bring your coffee maker and
tea bags and heat the water from there . . . not necessary, just
a thought.
Music -- YES! A playlist of your FIL's favorite songs/artists
would be a loving touch. Just keep the volume down low in the
background to not interfere with conversation.
Photo Album -- Another strong YES! What a thoughtful idea this
is! And a great conversation starter.
Games -- I say go ahead and plan a game or two. See how the
party is going before you break one out. If the party is slow
and dragging, then a fun game would be a nice touch to lighten
the mood.
If the party is full of conversation, remembering thoughts, and
a good time is being had by all, then there's no need to
interrupt that awesome camaraderie.
*****
Side story -- my father played trumpet in a community concert
band. He was in at-home hospice care when I went to visit for
one of the last times. My mother received a phone call one
morning and one of the band members asked if it was okay if the
entire band came out for a visit.
My mother, of course, said "Yes! That would be wonderful!" When
she got off of the phone, she said "About 40 people will be here
in two hours. What are we going to do for food?" (Why is food
always involved in these types of events?)
My sister and I jumped on it. I had brought a large bouquet of
fruit (which I found out later that my father couldn't eat) so I
started chopping it all up and putting bite-sized pieces on a
platter. My sister dug through my mother's well stocked fridge
for cheeses and sausages and put that on a platter along with
crackers and whatever veggies we could find. My mother also had
a few jars of spiced apple cider (non-alcoholic) which we put on
stove-top to warm.
The band showed up . . . with instruments! and all piled into
the small house and began to set up (I couldn't believe that
they all fit!). They played four sets of music from their
upcoming concert. The appreciative look on my father's face was
priceless.
People stood in line at his bedroom door in order to give him
their final thoughts and wishes.
People stood in line for the cider and all the food was gone
when they left but I'm betting that, while the food and drink
were appreciated, it wasn't necessary.
What that band did was a tribute to my father.
*****
With that being said, don't stress yourself too much over the
party details (you have enough other things to worry about) and
try to enjoy the thought, the tribute, the gatherings of friends
and family that will mean so much to your FIL.
You're doing a good thing.
#Post#: 78989--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: NFPwife Date: March 19, 2023, 7:12 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Thank you all for your kind words and ideas!
I've been working on this this weekend. Toots was right about
Cousin Jay. He's concerned about cross contamination and asked
if I'd mind him bringing his own food or not eating and I said
"Not at all!" He's also going to help set-up. Phew!
Coffee and tea are a good idea. I might find a little Keurig,
ours is the dual machine that has a coffee pot and the pod side.
It's too much to transport. jpcher - what a lovely story, thank
you for sharing it!
We did a dry run of the pizza place and picked up a couple for
the staff. They were ready on time and delicious. (we got one
for us) so I'm feeling good about that part of the plan. I'm
going to do one pepperoni, one ham, two mushroom, and three
extra cheese. It should be four slices per person.
I'm picking up the albums from the house and doing the playlist
tomorrow.
Again, thank you all!
#Post#: 79317--------------------------------------------------
Re: Pizza Lunch - help me think this through
By: NFPwife Date: May 16, 2023, 10:50 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
We were discussing this party today. FIL had a nice time and was
just talking about having another. We had way more pizza than
needed and gave two full pies to staff. Some cookies and sodas
went to them too. Thank you all for helping me think this
through!
*****************************************************