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       Bad Manners and Brimstone
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       #Post#: 75837--------------------------------------------------
       The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: June 12, 2022, 5:53 am
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       This might be an interesting conversation starter...
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       My summary: A Disney loving couple wanted to have an appearance
       by the Mickey and Minnie at their wedding, so they used the
       catering budget to make that happen. This left the guests to
       fend for themselves.
       I wonder what solutions Brimestoners have for this situation?
       #Post#: 75838--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: Aleko Date: June 12, 2022, 7:26 am
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       I don't think it's a conundrum at all. If you invite people to
       your wedding, you feed them. Period. Doesn't have to be fancy
       food, but food there must be. The "wedding feast" is the oldest
       and most fundamental element of wedding ceremonies across the
       globe. Also, by telling people simply to go and find themselves
       the overpriced eatery of their choice (or get a bag of crisps
       from a vending machine if they couldn't afford that) they were
       actually preventing any social meal happening. That's even worse
       in a way than making people pay for their plate at a catered
       meal.
       And these "guests" apparently had to pay for their travel to
       Disney World, at least one night's accommodation there, and an
       entry ticket. If they weren't being invited to a meal of any
       kind, what exactly did the "invitation" consist of? "Have a day
       at Disney World, see us hitched, hand over a present, then go
       eat wherever you can?"
       BTW, I'm also with the commenters who note darkly that the happy
       couple may indeed have "CLEARLY outlined in the invitations that
       there was food available at the venue", but did they outline as
       clearly that the guests would have to pay for it?
       The whine that "there were also vending machines available
       throughout" if any of their guests felt they couldn't afford a
       restaurant really puts the tin lid on it. It shows that they
       realise people might not have felt able to afford an overpriced
       restaurant meal on top of the costs this wedding has imposed on
       them, and they don't care.
       #Post#: 75839--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: AnnNottingham Date: June 12, 2022, 8:51 am
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       Right.  A guest means...you feed your guests.  It can be cake
       and punch, but you do something.
       At first, I hadn't realized that the wedding was at Disney.  So
       everyone had to travel to Disney, presumably stay on Disney
       property, and all the other costs, and they got vending machines
       or $$$$ Disney restaurants?
       I would have been suspicious at "Food will be available at the
       venue", if I had been thinking of attending at all.  I also get
       the feeling that it was not spelled out that the "guests" had to
       buy it.
       No conundrum for me, either.  The couple put Mickey and Minnie
       Mouse impersonators above their family and friends.
       #Post#: 75842--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: lakey Date: June 12, 2022, 11:51 am
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       I suspect this is fake. They spend, probably, a couple thousand
       dollars to have the Disney rats show up for a half hour, and
       don't feed your guests anything, not even appetizers? And both
       sets of parents think that's just fine and dandy? Nope, not
       buying it.
       #Post#: 75843--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: June 12, 2022, 12:49 pm
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       [quote author=lakey link=topic=2355.msg75842#msg75842
       date=1655052680]
       I suspect this is fake. They spend, probably, a couple thousand
       dollars to have the Disney rats show up for a half hour, and
       don't feed your guests anything, not even appetizers? And both
       sets of parents think that's just fine and dandy? Nope, not
       buying it.
       [/quote]
       It would not surprise me to learn that this is fake. I have
       never been to a Disney wedding, but my understanding is that the
       rental fee is steep. Cutting out the food would not really make
       a dent in the overall budget. In fact, it would not surprise me
       that Disney's wedding package includes catering of some sort.
       But when I read it, I thought it might be fun to discuss here.
       My understanding has been that you don't necessary owe your
       guests a meal if the party wasn't during a standard meal time.
       However, you should offer hospitality to make them comfortable.
       If it was an afternoon wedding, then a laid back reception where
       drinks and maybe a few Disney snacks were provided (and still a
       visit by the celebrity mice) would be acceptable. But maybe I'm
       wrong???
       #Post#: 75844--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: Rose Red Date: June 12, 2022, 12:51 pm
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       I sure hope it's fake.
       If it's real:
       Did it say if the guests have to buy their own admission tickets
       to get into the park? That's big bucks right there in addition
       to travel expenses.
       $5500.00 for two 30 minute sessions?! These are people in
       costumes, not real celebrities mice. Nice if you have $5500.00
       laying around, but I doubt this couple does since they can't
       afford food for their guests. And it's even worse if they do
       have extra money laying around and won't miss that much cash.
       If you can't feed your guests, people who are not
       self-involved/selfish and with common sense tell themselves to
       buy a Mickey and Minnie cake topper or something like that and
       feed your guests.
       Also, not warning they won't be serving food is garbage. Even if
       I (as a guest), end up going for some crazy reason, I'd at least
       know to pack my own lunch and snacks.
       #Post#: 75845--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: Gellchom Date: June 12, 2022, 2:14 pm
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       I, too, suspect this is fake.
       One reason I think that is the whole business about the food
       money going for the "mice."  I assume there were other costs
       associated with this wedding -- clothes, flowers, officiant, and
       of course the venue itself.  Money is fungible; the food money
       in particular no more went to the mice than it did to those
       other things.  Not to mention that this couple has the means to
       travel to Disney multiple times in a year; giving up one or two
       of those trips would have freed up some money for wedding costs.
       In other words, there are lots of things they spent money on,
       not just Mickey and Minnie.
       It comes down to the same old thing: spending all/most your
       budget on yourselves and none/very little on your guests.  We
       see this all the time, don't we?  Often in the context of very
       expensive destination weddings, pay-your-own-way restaurant
       receptions, inconvenient venues or times (like on the
       mountaintop at dawn), and so forth.  It's just a particularly
       ridiculous example, especially because of the way they put it:
       spending the food budget, specifically, on Mickey and Minnie.
       #Post#: 75847--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: Aleko Date: June 12, 2022, 4:43 pm
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       [quote]My understanding has been that you don't necessary owe
       your guests a meal if the party wasn't during a standard meal
       time.[/quote]
       That’s true only for parties that people aren’t going to have to
       travel serious distances for. Yes, if you invite friends who
       live locally to come over for an hour or so mid-morning,
       mid-afternoon or 5 pm, you are only obligated to offer them
       coffee/tea/cocktails as appropriate and a few biscuits, pastries
       or nibbles. But if your guests have had to travel for hours to
       get to your event, and have as long a journey back home, you owe
       them a decent meal.
       #Post#: 75848--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: NFPwife Date: June 12, 2022, 5:43 pm
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       I saw this on Reddit originally, and, sadly, I think it's real.
       I've learned that Redditors do a lot of discovery and I didn't
       see it called out. The page for Disney wedding pricing pieces
       everything out. You can do venue and entertainment separate from
       food.
  HTML https://www.disneyweddings.com/florida/pricing/
       The OP
       defended her choices in the comments a bit before giving up.
       They should have fed the guests something, but there doesn't
       seem to be a heavy appetizers or cake and punch option. Dinner
       is $210 per person. Plus tax and gratuity. They couldn't afford
       to offer their guests hospitality and have the rodents. So they
       went with rodents. Because Disney is such an important part of
       their story.
       #Post#: 75849--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Disney Wedding Conundrum
       By: Winterlight Date: June 12, 2022, 7:35 pm
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       They failed basic Hosting 101. Not only did they not feed their
       guests, they expected their guests to pay for the privilege of
       eating there. And it doesn't sound to me like they told the
       guests that they were going to have to buy their own food,
       either. The way the OP phrased it, it came across like they were
       being assured food would be there, not that they were going to
       have to pony up for Disney food prices themselves.
       And IRRC, the OP said in a comment that she and Hubby had lunch
       with Mickey and Minnie. So they got food, but nobody else did.
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