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       #Post#: 75406--------------------------------------------------
       Another obscure dress code 
       By: Gellchom Date: May 12, 2022, 4:17 pm
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       We just got a save-the-date card for a young cousin’s upcoming
       wedding.  It’s at a California lodge-type resort in October.
       The invitation, when it comes, may clarify things some, but the
       wedding website says:
       ***
       WHAT IS THE DRESS CODE FOR THE CEREMONY?
       Fireside Formal: [Groom] + [Bride] will be wearing their finest
       wedding attire.
       Ceremony is outdoors so please check forecast and leave those
       wobbly heels at home.
       ***
       “Fireside formal” is a new one for me.  Campfire?  Fireplace?
       Formal?  I get it that spiky heels won’t work for the outdoor
       ceremony, and it sounds like they want something dressy, but
       beyond that -  I got nothing.
       I’ll ask the groom’s mother (my first cousin) what I should
       pack, but just for fun, what do you think it means?
       I wish people wouldn’t do this.  I know it feels breezy and fun
       to them to make up a clever dress code, but it confuses and
       annoys guests, and just defeats the purpose, which is to give
       guests clear guidance so that they don’t have to worry that they
       will feel over- or underdressed.
       The plans for the wedding sound terrific - lovely, fun, and very
       hospitable; they’ve got the whole place for the weekend, and
       everyone is invited to and treated for everything.  And the
       accommodations are reasonably priced cottages, which is a big
       relief - there had been talk of glamping …. so MOG can at least
       be glad about that (she was dreading the glamping idea) when
       she’s taking all those phone calls about the attire!
       #Post#: 75409--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Rose Red Date: May 12, 2022, 5:52 pm
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       Do you know what the average temperature is for the area in
       October?
       #Post#: 75411--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: bigbadbetty Date: May 12, 2022, 7:09 pm
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       [quote author=gellchom link=topic=2345.msg75406#msg75406
       date=1652390254]
       I wish people wouldn’t do this.  I know it feels breezy and fun
       to them to make up a clever dress code, but it confuses and
       annoys guests, and just defeats the purpose, which is to give
       guests clear guidance so that they don’t have to worry that they
       will be over- or underdressed.
       [/quote]
       This is it exactly! I feel better with no dress code than a
       meaningless one! I have been to many weddings without a dress
       code. I have always kind of know based on the people getting
       married, time of day, and location.
       #Post#: 75412--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: AnnNottingham Date: May 12, 2022, 7:10 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       The wedding is in California? Northern or Southern makes a big
       difference in climate in October.  So does elevation.
       My first thought was a long skirt with a long-sleeve dressy
       blouse, and flats.
       #Post#: 75416--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Gellchom Date: May 13, 2022, 12:48 am
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       It’s in Southern California.
       [quote author=Rose Red link=topic=2345.msg75409#msg75409
       date=1652395947]
       Do you know what the average temperature is for the area in
       October?
       [/quote]
       They put this on the FAQs:
       WHAT IS THE WEATHER FORECAST?
       Weather at this altitude (5,174 ft) varies. Check the forecast
       before packing. See the table below for daily highs and lows for
       the past 4 years.
       October 29 2022 -  ______????_______
       October 29 2021 - High 95°       Low 69°
       October 29 2020 - High 90°      Low 48°
       October 29 2019 - High 58°        Low 45°
       October 29 2018 - High 86°         Low 55
       Everyone will be staying on site, so at least we can run back to
       our room for a coat if necessary.
       #Post#: 75417--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Aleko Date: May 13, 2022, 1:27 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       The “check the forecast!” part makes perfect sense: otherwise
       they’d be bound to get at least some people who are so used to
       indoor festivities that they turn out in stilettos and big hats
       although a gale has been forecast after a week of rain, and will
       have a miserably uncomfortable time as a result.
       As for “fireside formal”, is that even a phrase anywhere in the
       USA? The only thing I can imagine that makes any sense is “the
       kind of thing you would wear to a family gathering at the home
       of slightly stiff elderly relatives, i.e. you wash your face,
       polish your shoes, and at least put on a crisp clean shirt
       instead of a t-shirt, but nothing spangly or frivolous”. Which
       certainly wouldn’t be my choice for a wedding reception, but
       hey.
       #Post#: 75420--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Gellchom Date: May 13, 2022, 2:45 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Aleko link=topic=2345.msg75417#msg75417
       date=1652423253]
       The “check the forecast!” part makes perfect sense: otherwise
       they’d be bound to get at least some people who are so used to
       indoor festivities that they turn out in stilettos and big hats
       although a gale has been forecast after a week of rain, and will
       have a miserably uncomfortable time as a result.
       As for “fireside formal”, is that even a phrase anywhere in the
       USA? The only thing I can imagine that makes any sense is “the
       kind of thing you would wear to a family gathering at the home
       of slightly stiff elderly relatives, i.e. you wash your face,
       polish your shoes, and at least put on a crisp clean shirt
       instead of a t-shirt, but nothing spangly or frivolous”. Which
       certainly wouldn’t be my choice for a wedding reception, but
       hey.
       [/quote]
       I’m laughing at the picture of big hats taking off like sails.
       I know wedding ceremonies are (usually?  Always?) during the day
       in the UK (hence the hats).  In the US, evening is more common,
       and I believe this one will be in the evening.
       That’s what makes it tricky to do both outdoors and formal.
       Much easier to envision a formal daytime outfit that works
       outside.  But women’s evening formal and semi formal clothes
       usually require evening shoes that don’t work well outdoors,
       especially for short women like me!  I’ve never even owned
       dressy flats; I’ve used wedges in situations like this, but they
       don’t really look right with evening wear.  And even dressy
       flats are often made of fabrics that get ruined outdoors.
       I’m predicting that they really mean nice casual clothes, such
       as nice slacks or skirts and sweaters or jackets, i.e., “not
       jeans and sweats.”  The use of the word “formal” is what creates
       the confusion, really, more than “fireside,” although it would
       also help if they said whether they meant bonfire, campfire,
       fire pit, fireplace ….  But based on last year’s wedding and
       this one, that’s what “formal” seems to mean to young
       Californians!
       #Post#: 75421--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Aleko Date: May 13, 2022, 7:18 am
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       [quote]I’m laughing at the picture of big hats taking off like
       sails.[/quote]
       You can always spot the 'new money' women at posh country events
       in the UK: they're the ones with hair and hats that can't cope
       with more than the faintest breeze, and whose Louboutin high
       heels are sinking into the turf! Posh Brits are by definition at
       least part-time country folk, and know how to dress for the
       weather.
       [quote]" . . . women’s evening formal and semi formal clothes
       usually require evening shoes that don’t work well outdoors,
       especially for short women like me!  I’ve never even owned
       dressy flats; I’ve used wedges in situations like this, but they
       don’t really look right with evening wear.  And even dressy
       flats are often made of fabrics that get ruined
       outdoors."[/quote]
       A good friend of mine teamed her lovely off-the-shoulder
       ankle-length white wedding dress with silver high-top trainers.
       She looked terrific, and was able to dance the evening away on
       the grass in comfort!
       #Post#: 75422--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: oogyda Date: May 13, 2022, 9:21 am
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       It states the ceremony is outdoors.  Do we know if the reception
       is outdoors as well?
       "Fireside" could mean a fireplace inside the "lodge".  I'm
       picturing the HUGE fireplace that was the background for ODD's
       ceremony.  Her wedding was in February at a state park lodge in
       Illinois.  The reception was in a room off to the side.
       #Post#: 75423--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Another obscure dress code 
       By: Sara Crewe Date: May 13, 2022, 9:28 am
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       I read this as formal but warm, i.e. not standard bare or very
       thinly covered shoulders or arms for women.  However, I could be
       completely wrong.
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