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#Post#: 73451--------------------------------------------------
The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: BeagleMommy Date: January 31, 2022, 12:36 pm
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You guys are going to love this.
Many times, I am asked to forward information to our students
that does not necessitate a response. They are for information
such as job opportunities or student association activities.
When I send these emails I always include in the opening
paragraph "Please do not respond to this email. It is for
informational purposes only.". If there is someone to contact
if students have questions I always include that. I send these
to roughly 130 graduate students (more if I have to include
alumni). The reason I tell them not to respond is that, for the
most part, I have no other information and it would create a
never-ending email thread.
Most of the students are very good about this. Then there's
Ian.
Ian has already been told once to please refrain from responding
to these emails. Last week I sent out some information a
faculty member though the students might find helpful so I sent
it out with my usual "Please do not reply".
Ian's first reply: "Daring to reply. Who is this information
from."
Me: "Ian, this is just general information that I was
instructed to send"
Ian's next reply: Yes, but from WHOM?" (Capitalization his)
Me: It is from an external source and I was asked to send it to
students by a faculty member. In the future, please do no reply
to emails that have "do not reply" in the body of the email.
Ian's next reply: As to your request, your forwarded e-mail
contained no headers to suggest at whose behest it was sent.
You are literally the only person with that information, and I
daresay you would have been chagrined if I had to come ask in
person.
The tenor of your writing frequently suggests contempt for
students. However you may feel about them and whatever your
history, I remind you I am a bishop in Catholic orders, with an
advanced degree. Please modulate your tone with me accordingly.
Frankly, I would have preferred he come to my office. I care
very much about our students and, in fact, assisted Ian in
registering for classes just this semester. He seems to forget
that.
He is the CEO of a local large charity and apparently thinks I
am beneath him. As far as his being a bishop in Catholic
orders? Yay for him. It means nothing to his studies and does
not impress me at all. As far as I'm concerned he is just like
any other first-year grad student. Apparently, his advanced
degree didn't teach him to follow directions. >:(
#Post#: 73452--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: oogyda Date: January 31, 2022, 1:00 pm
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Wow!
On one hand, it's hard to "let" him have the last word, because
it's really not his place as a graduate student under your care
to chastise you and assume motivation/regard for students. On
the other hand, a rebuttal perpetuates the "never-ending email
thread you hope to avoid.
Personally, if I were to respond at all it would be to say
something along the lines of "On the contrary, I would be quite
happy, as always, to receive you in my office in person."
Ignore the rest as the glorified chest-thumping it is.
#Post#: 73453--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: LurkingGurl Date: January 31, 2022, 1:05 pm
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What the heck does it mean to be "a bishop in Catholic
orders?!!!"
Is he a Catholic Bishop? Because Catholic Bishops say "I'm a
Catholic Bishop."
Kinda weird, don't you think?
#Post#: 73454--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: sandisadie Date: January 31, 2022, 1:09 pm
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How arrogant this man is!! I can imagine he decided to be the
CEO of a charity so that he could feel superior to all those who
"bow" before him while imploring him to give them something they
need.
#Post#: 73456--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: BeagleMommy Date: January 31, 2022, 1:19 pm
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[quote author=Mary Sunshine Rain
link=topic=2274.msg73453#msg73453 date=1643655938]
What the heck does it mean to be "a bishop in Catholic
orders?!!!"
Is he a Catholic Bishop? Because Catholic Bishops say "I'm a
Catholic Bishop."
Kinda weird, don't you think?
[/quote]
I had to look that up because he also lists it on his resume.
He's a deacon in an Episcopal Catholic church. Still holds no
water with me as far as his studies or attitude.
#Post#: 73458--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: Jem Date: January 31, 2022, 2:02 pm
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[quote author=BeagleMommy link=topic=2274.msg73451#msg73451
date=1643654172]
"Please do not respond to this email. It is for informational
purposes only."
[/quote]
I would just ignore any replies. I sometimes get emails that say
something like: "PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL. REPLIES TO
THIS EMAIL WILL NOT RECEIVE A RESPONSE." You could consider
something like that?
This guy seems like a jerk, but I do understand his frustration.
To him it seems like you have the substantive response, you are
in fact responding, but you are simply refusing to provide the
substantive response to him. I'm not saying you owe *any*
response, but I think it would be better in the future to either
not respond or if you are going to respond actually provide the
answer requested.
#Post#: 73460--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: BeagleMommy Date: January 31, 2022, 2:12 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Jem link=topic=2274.msg73458#msg73458
date=1643659361]
[quote author=BeagleMommy link=topic=2274.msg73451#msg73451
date=1643654172]
"Please do not respond to this email. It is for informational
purposes only."
[/quote]
I would just ignore any replies. I sometimes get emails that say
something like: "PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL. REPLIES TO
THIS EMAIL WILL NOT RECEIVE A RESPONSE." You could consider
something like that?
This guy seems like a jerk, but I do understand his frustration.
To him it seems like you have the substantive response, you are
in fact responding, but you are simply refusing to provide the
substantive response to him. I'm not saying you owe *any*
response, but I think it would be better in the future to either
not respond or if you are going to respond actually provide the
answer requested.
[/quote]
I can't provide an answer I don't have. The information is all
in the emails. I don't have anything that I don't send.
#Post#: 73461--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: Jem Date: January 31, 2022, 2:18 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=BeagleMommy link=topic=2274.msg73460#msg73460
date=1643659959]
[quote author=Jem link=topic=2274.msg73458#msg73458
date=1643659361]
[quote author=BeagleMommy link=topic=2274.msg73451#msg73451
date=1643654172]
"Please do not respond to this email. It is for informational
purposes only."
[/quote]
I would just ignore any replies. I sometimes get emails that say
something like: "PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS EMAIL. REPLIES TO
THIS EMAIL WILL NOT RECEIVE A RESPONSE." You could consider
something like that?
This guy seems like a jerk, but I do understand his frustration.
To him it seems like you have the substantive response, you are
in fact responding, but you are simply refusing to provide the
substantive response to him. I'm not saying you owe *any*
response, but I think it would be better in the future to either
not respond or if you are going to respond actually provide the
answer requested.
[/quote]
I can't provide an answer I don't have. The information is all
in the emails. I don't have anything that I don't send.
[/quote]
Then I would simply not reply at all I think. I am not saying
you have any obligation to provide information to anyone beyond
your initial email, but I can see where Ian thought you were
withholding information. He likely assumes you know the identity
of the external source and the faculty member you reference in
your reply and he is likely frustrated that you won't share that
with him. Again, you probably have no obligation to share this
information with him but based on your wording I do see where
his frustration is coming from.
Ian's first reply: "Daring to reply. Who is this information
from."
Me: "Ian, this is just general information that I was
instructed to send"
Ian's next reply: Yes, but from WHOM?" (Capitalization his)
Me: It is from an [color=red]external source and I was asked to
send it to students by a faculty member. In the future, please
do no reply to emails that have "do not reply" in the body of
the email.[/color]
Again, I am sorry Ian is a jerk and you have to deal with this.
I think going forward I would alter the initial email to make it
clear no replies will be responded to, and then don't respond at
all.
#Post#: 73465--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: DaDancingPsych Date: January 31, 2022, 2:59 pm
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If this was a one-off situation where Ian was being polite, then
I might reply (even if my reply was that I didn't have the
information that he wanted.) But when someone can't follow the
directions and is rude... nope. His replies to "no reply" emails
would be met with silence.
#Post#: 73466--------------------------------------------------
Re: The Attitude is Strong with This One
By: Bada Date: January 31, 2022, 3:04 pm
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[quote author=BeagleMommy link=topic=2274.msg73456#msg73456
date=1643656795]
[quote author=Mary Sunshine Rain
link=topic=2274.msg73453#msg73453 date=1643655938]
What the heck does it mean to be "a bishop in Catholic
orders?!!!"
Is he a Catholic Bishop? Because Catholic Bishops say "I'm a
Catholic Bishop."
Kinda weird, don't you think?
[/quote]
I had to look that up because he also lists it on his resume.
He's a deacon in an Episcopal Catholic church. Still holds no
water with me as far as his studies or attitude.
[/quote]
I'm still confused. As a Roman Catholic, I've never heard of an
Episcopal Catholic. This is the only thing I see about those,
and they changed their names last fall (because they were using
the word "catholic" as an adjective meaning universal, not as in
the Catholic Church hierarchically)
HTML https://www.episcopalcatholicchurch.org/
But he's only a deacon of some sort and he has that attitude?
Good grief. He doesn't understand servant leadership, does he?
He asks that you speak to him differently than all the other
students. I wonder if it's worth telling him that you can't
tailor individual emails to him. And maybe like others have
said, invite him to your office instead and start saying in the
original email that you won't respond to replies so you have
solid grounds to ignore his emails.
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