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#Post#: 71981--------------------------------------------------
Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: DaDancingPsych
Date: November 24, 2021, 2:16 pm
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No real advice needed; I am just wondering if I am crazy. I have
a friend who every year posts on Facebook that she is preparing
to send out Christmas cards and that if you want one to message
her your address. This is not a case of contact information
being lost as it happens annually and people have posted asking
if she needs the details again. This feels so strange to me...
do you have thoughts?
#Post#: 71982--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: NFPwife
Date: November 24, 2021, 2:38 pm
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Is this her way to say, "Can I take you off the list?" or "I'd
like to drop this process, please give me permission." Is she
prone to passive aggression?
#Post#: 71984--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: gramma dishes
Date: November 24, 2021, 3:30 pm
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I think what she is trying to say is "I used to send out
zillions of Christmas cards and I loved doing it. But nowadays
my hands are more arthritic and my budget is lower. It's
expensive to make or buy a lot of cards and pay for all that
postage for people who really don't appreciate them or even
worse, think of them as just junk they have to pay to have
hauled away in a couple of weeks. So I'm still happy to send
joyful cards to those who genuinely enjoy getting them, but for
those who do not, I'd love being able to erase your name off the
list. Thank you."
#Post#: 71986--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: DaDancingPsych
Date: November 24, 2021, 3:38 pm
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--- Quote from: PVZFan link ---
>
> Is this her way to say, "Can I take you off the list?" or "I'd
like to drop this process, please give me permission." Is she
prone to passive aggression?
>
--- End Quote ---
No, she's really not a passive aggressive person at all. Now
maybe it is a way of pairing down or focusing efforts. She's
very outgoing and I imagine her list could be quite long.
I've never replied to the message, however some years she has
sent me a card anyways. It's a lovely gesture and I do
appreciate it, but not something that I would ask for.
#Post#: 71987--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: Rose Red
Date: November 24, 2021, 3:45 pm
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Maybe she's afraid of leaving someone out by mistake so if
someone *really* want a card, she wants them to message her so
she's sure not forget that person.
#Post#: 71988--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: DaDancingPsych
Date: November 24, 2021, 4:02 pm
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--- Quote from: Rose Red link ---
>
> Maybe she's afraid of leaving someone out by mistake so if
someone *really* want a card, she wants them to message her so
she's sure not forget that person.
>
--- End Quote ---
This definitely matches her personality. (From an etiquette
point of view, I would probably suggest that the person send her
a card, as I would think that that is the social cue that
exchanging cards is something that you desire. However, I admit,
that could be vague.)
#Post#: 71992--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: lakey
Date: November 24, 2021, 5:25 pm
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My guess is that she means well, but it could come across as
awkward, because you would feel like you were asking for a card.
She probably just thinks that this is an efficient way to handle
it.
#Post#: 71998--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: Aleko
Date: November 25, 2021, 2:42 am
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Even a person who isn’t actively looking to pare down their card
list may often look at it and say to themselves ‘Some of these
people I haven’t seen in 20 years and I don’t particularly mind
if I never see them again. I don’t think I’d even recognise them
if I met them. For all I know, they hardly remember me, don’t
get any joy from my card, and wouldn’t care if they never heard
from me again. But how can I be sure it wouldn’t hurt their
feelings if I dropped them from my list?’ It is an awkward
question, and if anybody here can suggest a better approach than
this lady’s idea, do tell.
#Post#: 72004--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: Lilipons
Date: November 25, 2021, 9:47 am
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When you reach certain stages in lifee, it becomes necessary to
check in before the holiday card every year. We’re in our 70s.
Sad as it is to say, people we know have moved, died or lost a
partner.
Knowing the truth is better than wondering.
#Post#: 72005--------------------------------------------------
Re: Let Me Know If You Want A Christmas Card
DIR By: holly firestorm
Date: November 25, 2021, 12:43 pm
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--- Quote from: gramma dishes link ---
>
> I think what she is trying to say is "I used to send out
zillions of Christmas cards and I loved doing it. But nowadays
my hands are more arthritic and my budget is lower. It's
expensive to make or buy a lot of cards and pay for all that
postage for people who really don't appreciate them or even
worse, think of them as just junk they have to pay to have
hauled away in a couple of weeks. So I'm still happy to send
joyful cards to those who genuinely enjoy getting them, but for
those who do not, I'd love being able to erase your name off the
list. Thank you."
>
--- End Quote ---
Also, people move and sending fewer cards is better for the
environment.
I haven't sent XMas cards in decades. I found too many of them
were people I only contacted with the yearly card, and vice
versa. I have a XMas card list somewhere. At this point I think
most of the people on it have moved or passed away.
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