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#Post#: 67844--------------------------------------------------
How Would You Have Handled This
By: BeagleMommy Date: July 2, 2021, 10:10 am
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I apologize if I posted this on the old board. I was wondering
how my fellow Brimstoners would have handled this. There is no
doubt the guest was rude.
A friend of mine got married in the late 1980s (about 6 months
before I did) and I was a bridesmaid in her wedding. She and
her groom paid for the entire wedding on their own and their
budget was pretty tight.
The venue where they had their reception was a popular place
with amazing food and lots of options. They chose to have a
plated dinner with only one type of entrée: roasted turkey
dinner (no one who was attending had dietary needs or was
vegetarian/vegan). The venue usually hosted three wedding
receptions on the same evening (several halls).
When dinner was served, the head waiter came over to the bride
and explained that one guest said he "wasn't in the mood" for a
turkey dinner so could he order something else. :o Waiter went
on to say they had some extra steak dinners from another
reception and they would give him one of those, but she would
have to pay extra for it.
She was taken aback for a moment, but agreed to pay for the
steak dinner after finding out it was a relative of hers and her
mother kind of pressured her to "keep the peace".
Personally, I would have said no simply because I was paying for
all the food and feel that if you are a guest at a wedding you
eat what is provided. If it isn't what you were expecting, by
all means go get what you want when the wedding is over.
Would you have allowed this guest to get a different dinner?
#Post#: 67847--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: sandisadie Date: July 2, 2021, 10:55 am
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In a word, NO! You don't attend a function where food is served
and then expect the host to pay extra because you don't want to
eat what is offered. If you don't want to eat the food you just
keep your mouth shut and decide to find a place to eat after the
event is over. Or - you could always leave before the food is
served and eat somewhere else.
#Post#: 67849--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: Amara Date: July 2, 2021, 11:38 am
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The guest was rude but the bride's mother was ruder. If the
mother wanted the relative to have the steak dinner, she should
have handed over the money to the waiter right there and not
said a word to anyone else.
#Post#: 67850--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: lakey Date: July 2, 2021, 11:41 am
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No. As I get older it becomes easier and easier for me to say no
when people make unreasonable requests.
#Post#: 67851--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: oogyda Date: July 2, 2021, 11:43 am
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So far, I agree with everyone else.
I also fault the waiter and going up the chain, the venue.
#Post#: 67855--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: Gellchom Date: July 2, 2021, 1:56 pm
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The guest was super rude (or so it sounds. They might have just
asked if there was another choice available; we all know how the
telephone game works).
But that isn’t the question! The guest’s behavior isn’t the
issue, it’s what the hosts should do.
Absolutely, the hosts had no obligation to buy the guest a
steak. I might have anyway — like welcoming a date someone
thought they were allowed to bring, even though you don’t have
to — depending upon whether it could start problems with other
guests. And the great story is worth the few bucks upcharge.
:)
I think the staff was most at fault, really. They should’ve
said sorry, no, this is the menu tonight.
#Post#: 67859--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: jpcher Date: July 2, 2021, 3:01 pm
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[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=2096.msg67855#msg67855
date=1625252203]
I think the staff was most at fault, really. They should’ve
said sorry, no, this is the menu tonight.
[/quote]
I completely agree with this.
Just think of the havoc it could have caused if someone else
asked "why did he get a steak? I want one too!" Then other
people jump on the bandwagon "I want X for dinner!" and the ball
rolls downhill from there.
The requester was a boor.
The wait staffer was unskilled.
I could almost understand if it was a person with allergies that
wasn't properly accounted for in the menu planning but switching
a turkey to a steak dinner is simply a personal preference that
should not have been tolerated.
#Post#: 67860--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: Rose Red Date: July 2, 2021, 3:24 pm
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Nope. It's not fair to the other guests.
#Post#: 67861--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: chigger Date: July 2, 2021, 4:04 pm
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I agree 100% with JPcher! Server should have told demanding
guest turkey is the entree and should not have offered a steak.
That's the mark of a very inexperienced banquet server. Mom
should have stayed out of it OR shut down demanding relative, no
way should this have even come onto the brides radar. OP, I have
a strange feeling that this was the Mom's husband?
#Post#: 67862--------------------------------------------------
Re: How Would You Have Handled This
By: Lula Date: July 2, 2021, 4:47 pm
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[NVM, misread the OP]
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