DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: The Work Day
*****************************************************
#Post#: 2791--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: guest426
Date: May 21, 2018, 10:16 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: betty link ---
>
> I might ignore the request on Facebook but send them a link
request from my LinkedIN, where I am all business all the time.
>
--- End Quote ---
This is a very reasonable course of action.
I would be put off by a potential employer sending me a friend
request on Facebook. I use FB to keep in touch with friends &
family, not for anything to do with my work or professional
life.
#Post#: 2797--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: Surly
Date: May 21, 2018, 10:54 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I agree, I wouldn't accept it, I'd just ignore for now as if I
hadn't seen it. If they ask you about it, then you can mention
you keep it just for personal use and don't friend coworkers.
I don't think it's nefarious that they'd want to check you out
that way, since you can see the request and decline (or ignore)
it. I work in academia too and at least in my field I'm friends
with a lot of colleagues, and social media is used by many for
sharing work-related ideas, articles, etc., so it seems
normal-ish. (I've also had colleagues decline to be FB friends
and it hasn't bothered me.)
Good luck with the interview!
#Post#: 2798--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: guest249
Date: May 21, 2018, 11:09 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I think you are fine to ignore it, for now. I doubt it will
come up, but if it does you can always claim that you haven't
gotten around to looking at the request and didn't realize you
had one from him.
That said, I would guess that the reason you received the
request to begin with is because the Dean is trying to learn
more about you via your social media accounts and online
activity. This is not uncommon. While it doesn't obligate you
to accept his request, it might not be a bad idea to do so,
especially if you start working for him.
I used to have a strict "no work" policy on my FB account,
especially considering that my work is semi-public and my
position within my organization. I reconsidered that policy
about a year ago because I realize that the world is changing
and social media is now becoming ingrained in our professional
lives. For that reason, I have created a group specifically for
my coworkers and exclude them from most of my posts. I also
choose not to discuss politics at all on FB. I now look at FB
like the family table at Thanksgiving dinner...not saying
there's anything wrong with discussing politics, but in this
political climate, I have chosen not to engage online at all.
There are times where I'm tempted, but overall am happy with my
choice (not to mention a lot less frustrated!)
#Post#: 3081--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: nuit93
Date: May 22, 2018, 12:03 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I know some people who have two social media accounts: one for
coworkers that they're fairly "restrained" on and only post
industry-related stuff, and one where they can just be
themselves.
#Post#: 3167--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: wonderfullyanonymous
Date: May 22, 2018, 5:28 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
You don't have to accept or deny, just let it sit in limbo.
Chances are the person/people have so many friends, they will
not notice if you leave it for now.
#Post#: 3170--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: TootsNYC
Date: May 22, 2018, 5:39 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: guest227 link ---
>
> It strikes me as a very unprofessional move by the Dean. A
facebook profile contains lots of personal info that they
legally shouldn't be asking you in the interview (such as
whether you are married or have children). This could be their
way of circumventing those prohibitions. I would definitely not
accept the request.
>
--- End Quote ---
actually, they can ask you. They can't make their hiring
decision because of that info.
And so it's smarter to not ask those questions, because then it
won't influence them.
And I agree that it's not a good move by the Dean; I'm giving
the Dean some serious side-eye here.
I'm on the team that says just let it sit there. You didn't see
it.
And then you can also say, "I keep Facebook personal." Later, if
it comes up.
#Post#: 3347--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: Dr. F.
Date: May 23, 2018, 8:13 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
So, I just got back from the interview. It was a little odd, in
that everyone (Dean especially) made it utterly clear from the
very beginning that they were going to offer me the job.
For instance:
Dean: So Dr. So-and-so is hosting breakfast for you tomorrow.
She's the person you will be replacing. It has two motives - to
get to know you and to try to sell you her house.
Me: (Privately: erm, what?) Oh, how nice (verbally).
etc. There was lots more in this vein.
Dean: We're interviewing one more person, but he doesn't have
half the experience you do. Please keep your calendar open.
Me: Oh. OK.
Honestly, I acquit the Dean of anything besides enthusiasm. Will
I take the job, if offered (which seems likely, though not
guaranteed in any sense)? Probably. I would have my own
*building*, which includes offices, lab, and museum. It's not a
huge building, but, seriously? My own building?!? A biologist's
dream!
I told them that they have until June 1 to make me an offer (my
current job wants a decision by then for the next year). We'll
see what happens.
#Post#: 3363--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: Starry Diadem
Date: May 24, 2018, 12:14 am
---------------------------------------------------------
--- Quote from: Dr. F. link ---
>
> So, I just got back from the interview. It was a little odd,
in that everyone (Dean especially) made it utterly clear from
the very beginning that they were going to offer me the job.
>
> For instance:
> Dean: So Dr. So-and-so is hosting breakfast for you tomorrow.
She's the person you will be replacing. It has two motives - to
get to know you and to try to sell you her house.
>
> Me: (Privately: erm, what?) Oh, how nice (verbally).
>
> etc. There was lots more in this vein.
>
> Dean: We're interviewing one more person, but he doesn't have
half the experience you do. Please keep your calendar open.
>
> Me: Oh. OK.
>
> Honestly, I acquit the Dean of anything besides enthusiasm.
Will I take the job, if offered (which seems likely, though not
guaranteed in any sense)? Probably. I would have my own
*building*, which includes offices, lab, and museum. It's not a
huge building, but, seriously? My own building?!? A biologist's
dream!
>
> I told them that they have until June 1 to make me an offer
(my current job wants a decision by then for the next year).
We'll see what happens.
>
--- End Quote ---
Oh, I do hope this works out for you. You've been looking for an
academic post for a while, if I remember correctly, and it must
be exciting to have this opportunity.
As long as it isn't contingent on house buying, of course!
#Post#: 3392--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: Bada
Date: May 24, 2018, 9:25 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Congrats on the great interview! It sounds like it was more of
a chance for you to interview THEM to make sure you like it.
June 1 is pretty close. Hopefully the timing is ok!
#Post#: 3401--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
DIR By: IceBear
Date: May 24, 2018, 10:40 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Congrats on the interview, hope it works out!
I got a Facebook friend request from one of my managers and
thought it was odd. Before that I had a "no coworkers" policy.
After that, I decided to friend coworkers and add them to my
"Acquaintances" list, and I often post to Friends except
Acquaintances".
If I had the habit of posting anything particularly scandalous
though, I'd keep my "no coworkers" policy. I'm not 100%
confident in any website's security and it would not surprise me
if someday there was a bug and everyone could see all my posts.
This is also a good reason to apply the "Never post anything on
the internet you wouldn't want your Mom to read" rule for
posting anything under your real name.
*****************************************************
Page 2 of 3
DIR Previous Page
DIR Next Page