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#Post#: 2705--------------------------------------------------
To friend or not to friend...
By: Dr. F. Date: May 20, 2018, 10:23 pm
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that is the question.
This could have gone here or in Techno-quette. I put it here
because it seemed more relevant to my actual question. If mods
would like to move it, that would be fine.
I am driving out tomorrow to interview for a tenure-track
position, which would be a step up from where I am now. I have
an offer pending from where I am now for the next year, but this
would be a potential move upwards.
Tonight, I got a friend request from the Dean and Chair of the
Search Committee of where I'm interviewing this next week. I
feel like it might be a good move to go ahead and accept, but,
well, I occasionally get political in my own FB feed. Not
always, and not overwhelmingly (I'm pretty middle-of-the-road),
but, still. With the world the way it is now, I'm not overly
comfortable giving this person access before and during the
interview. But, would it look bad to not accept? This person
would be my boss' boss if I end up getting and taking this
position.
Gah. Help?
#Post#: 2709--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: guest14 Date: May 20, 2018, 10:32 pm
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I wouldn't accept. Can you credibility claim a policy of not
friending coworkers?
#Post#: 2710--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: Dr. F. Date: May 20, 2018, 10:35 pm
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[quote author=rashea link=topic=208.msg2709#msg2709
date=1526873520]
I wouldn't accept. Can you credibility claim a policy of not
friending coworkers?
[/quote]
Yes, none of my current coworkers are FB friends. That might be
my out.
#Post#: 2712--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: guest75 Date: May 20, 2018, 10:40 pm
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[quote author=Dr. F. link=topic=208.msg2705#msg2705
date=1526872992]
that is the question.
This could have gone here or in Techno-quette. I put it here
because it seemed more relevant to my actual question. If mods
would like to move it, that would be fine.
I am driving out tomorrow to interview for a tenure-track
position, which would be a step up from where I am now. I have
an offer pending from where I am now for the next year, but this
would be a potential move upwards.
Tonight, I got a friend request from the Dean and Chair of the
Search Committee of where I'm interviewing this next week. I
feel like it might be a good move to go ahead and accept, but,
well, I occasionally get political in my own FB feed. Not
always, and not overwhelmingly (I'm pretty middle-of-the-road),
but, still. With the world the way it is now, I'm not overly
comfortable giving this person access before and during the
interview. But, would it look bad to not accept? This person
would be my boss' boss if I end up getting and taking this
position.
Gah. Help?
[/quote]
[quote author=Dr. F. link=topic=208.msg2710#msg2710
date=1526873707]
[quote author=rashea link=topic=208.msg2709#msg2709
date=1526873520]
I wouldn't accept. Can you credibility claim a policy of not
friending coworkers?
[/quote]
Yes, none of my current coworkers are FB friends. That might be
my out.
[/quote]
This sounds good, especially since it's true.
#Post#: 2713--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: guest617 Date: May 20, 2018, 10:41 pm
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You got the request today and the interview is tomorrow? Some
people barely ever check their social media, so I think unless
there's a lot of public activity you're fine to go with "oh, I
don't check Facebook often, must have missed it!" if it comes up
somehow in the interview. As far as I know it'll just sit there
un-accepted, not show "Dr F. Rejected You" or anything.
#Post#: 2724--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: Hanna Date: May 20, 2018, 11:58 pm
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[quote author=Allyson link=topic=208.msg2713#msg2713
date=1526874109]
You got the request today and the interview is tomorrow? Some
people barely ever check their social media, so I think unless
there's a lot of public activity you're fine to go with "oh, I
don't check Facebook often, must have missed it!" if it comes up
somehow in the interview. As far as I know it'll just sit there
un-accepted, not show "Dr F. Rejected You" or anything.
[/quote]
Agreed. I don't see anything to gain by accepting the request.
I personally check FB so infrequently that I typically don't see
requests for days or even weeks. I get so many notifications
from them in my email, that I could miss that, too. So I think
you are fine.
#Post#: 2731--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: guest18 Date: May 21, 2018, 1:25 am
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[quote author=Allyson link=topic=208.msg2713#msg2713
date=1526874109]
You got the request today and the interview is tomorrow? Some
people barely ever check their social media, so I think unless
there's a lot of public activity you're fine to go with "oh, I
don't check Facebook often, must have missed it!" if it comes up
somehow in the interview. As far as I know it'll just sit there
un-accepted, not show "Dr F. Rejected You" or anything.
[/quote]
Your best bet is to just leave it. If you decline, they will be
able to see that - it won't show "Dr F. Rejected you", but it
will show that no request is pending, thus indicating that you
reacted on the first one.
"I don't friend coworkers" is the way to go if they actually ask
you about it.
#Post#: 2770--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: Bada Date: May 21, 2018, 8:51 am
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This is a frequent tactic so that interviewers can spy on you.
I've heard it done by junior interns (who are less recognizable
) to Recent College Grads (who are frequently frequently less
discerning than older people in who they friend and may not
realize they don't know the person/spy) at the request of the
higher ups.
I'd assume they want to spy rather than actually be friends. I
think you're wise not to friend co-workers (and thus not this
person)
#Post#: 2773--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: guest227 Date: May 21, 2018, 8:59 am
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It strikes me as a very unprofessional move by the Dean. A
facebook profile contains lots of personal info that they
legally shouldn't be asking you in the interview (such as
whether you are married or have children). This could be their
way of circumventing those prohibitions. I would definitely not
accept the request.
#Post#: 2789--------------------------------------------------
Re: To friend or not to friend...
By: betty Date: May 21, 2018, 10:09 am
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I might ignore the request on Facebook but send them a link
request from my LinkedIN, where I am all business all the time.
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