DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: Life in General
*****************************************************
#Post#: 60052--------------------------------------------------
Christmas and grief
By: Kimberami Date: November 12, 2020, 9:58 am
---------------------------------------------------------
One of my friends died in an accident about a month ago.
Immediately after the accident, I sent a card and made a
donation to my friend's favorite charity (requested in lieu of
flowers). I miss my friend, and I want his family to know that
I’m thinking about them. I know the holidays are going to be
rough this year. I want to send a thinking of you card/holiday
card. Would it be appropriate to send a restaurant gift card or
would that seem too random?
#Post#: 60054--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: NFPwife Date: November 12, 2020, 10:03 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I think sending a restaurant gift card would be so lovely! It
can give them a chance to enjoy a meal and think about how much
their son/ brother/ father/ uncle/ nephew was loved.
#Post#: 60055--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: Lilipons Date: November 12, 2020, 10:09 am
---------------------------------------------------------
Dear Kimpossible,
First of all, I am sorry for the loss of your friend. Once we
reach a certain age the holidays become tough. There are always
friends and family members who are no longer with us.
Certainly, a holiday card mentioning something along the lines
of, ‘Bringing a Message of Peace for the Season’ wouldn’t be out
of place.
Are you in contact with the family of your deceased friend? If
you are, let them know that you would like to give them a
holiday gift and ask what would be appropriate. I don’t see
anything wrong about that.
#Post#: 60061--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: gramma dishes Date: November 12, 2020, 10:48 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1917.msg60054#msg60054
date=1605197004]
I think sending a restaurant gift card would be so lovely! It
can give them a chance to enjoy a meal and think about how much
their son/ brother/ father/ uncle/ nephew was loved.
[/quote]
I totally 100% agree with this, but ...
even though I think the idea is wonderful, it remains doubtful
whether by the holidays any restaurants will be open! :'(
I guess they could order carry out and eat it at home. :-\
#Post#: 60073--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: jpcher Date: November 12, 2020, 2:18 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I think that including a note in the card which says that you
made an additional donation to Friend's favorite charity for the
holidays would be a touching remembrance.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
#Post#: 60074--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: wolfie Date: November 12, 2020, 2:27 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I think that would be a lovely thought.
#Post#: 60078--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: Gellchom Date: November 12, 2020, 4:44 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I would find a restaurant gift card kind of strange, actually,
at this point. Maybe, under the pandemic circumstances, I could
see that as sort of in lieu of cooking something and bringing it
to the family, but not more than a whole month later.
If you think that they are in need, then maybe it's a good idea,
but otherwise I'd send a letter saying how you had been missing
your friend and enjoying happy memories, such as the time that
[favorite memory], and that you are thinking of them all at this
time of year. An additional donation to the charity would be
nice, but really not necessary. The note saying nice things
about their loved one and a happy memory will mean the world to
them all by itself, I'm sure.
#Post#: 60086--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: Hmmm Date: November 12, 2020, 6:09 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=1917.msg60078#msg60078
date=1605221075]
I would find a restaurant gift card kind of strange, actually,
at this point. Maybe, under the pandemic circumstances, I could
see that as sort of in lieu of cooking something and bringing it
to the family, but not more than a whole month later.
If you think that they are in need, then maybe it's a good idea,
but otherwise I'd send a letter saying how you had been missing
your friend and enjoying happy memories, such as the time that
[favorite memory], and that you are thinking of them all at this
time of year. An additional donation to the charity would be
nice, but really not necessary. The note saying nice things
about their loved one and a happy memory will mean the world to
them all by itself, I'm sure.
[/quote]
I agree with Gellchom.
But if it was more personal, like a gift card to a restaurant
that was a favorite of your friends and adding something like "I
know friend loved Joey's Italian and I thought you might enjoy
dining there."
#Post#: 60089--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: STiG Date: November 12, 2020, 6:18 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Many people on this board have mentioned that all of the
reaching out from friends petered out by the first month and
that they were very grateful to friends who did something for
them beyond that period. So I think you would be fine to
include a restaurant gift card, or even a grocery gift card. Be
sure to pick a place that has takeout, though, considering this
pandemic doesn't look like it's going to be over anytime soon.
When my friend's Mom died in the fall, since I sent her parents
a card every year, I still sent a Christmas card to her Dad. I
picked one that said something like 'Wishing you peace this
holiday season.
I like the ideas of writing a personal story in your card and/or
an additional donation to their favourite charity.
#Post#: 60090--------------------------------------------------
Re: Christmas and grief
By: NFPwife Date: November 12, 2020, 6:20 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=gramma dishes link=topic=1917.msg60061#msg60061
date=1605199704]
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1917.msg60054#msg60054
date=1605197004]
I think sending a restaurant gift card would be so lovely! It
can give them a chance to enjoy a meal and think about how much
their son/ brother/ father/ uncle/ nephew was loved.
[/quote]
I totally 100% agree with this, but ...
even though I think the idea is wonderful, it remains doubtful
whether by the holidays any restaurants will be open! :'(
I guess they could order carry out and eat it at home. :-\
[/quote]
I definitely pictured that as take-out. Although the way we're
going in the US, restaurants could be fully closed by the
holidays.
Anything that recognizes that this is a trying time and you're
thinking of them will be appreciated.
I'm sorry for your loss, Kimpossible. Hugs!
*****************************************************
DIR Next Page