DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: Life in General
*****************************************************
#Post#: 58011--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: TootsNYC Date: September 25, 2020, 9:09 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=HenrysMom link=topic=1871.msg57996#msg57996
date=1601005879]
According the the Urban Dictionary, a Kevin is a nice, rather
sweet, perhaps not very smart guy.
[/quote]
There's a subreddit called Stories About Kevin, and the
"Kevin's" are never mean; they're just interestingly stupid,
often stubborn in their stupidity (or sometimes their stupidity
is stubborn).
#Post#: 58013--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: Hmmm Date: September 25, 2020, 9:35 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=chigger link=topic=1871.msg57980#msg57980
date=1600981111]
[quote author=Codewoman1125 link=topic=1871.msg57978#msg57978
date=1600980078]
[quote author=chigger link=topic=1871.msg57976#msg57976
date=1600979499]
[quote author=TootsNYC link=topic=1871.msg57967#msg57967
date=1600974333]
I feel bad for people whose name is Karen.
I know three of them.
One is SO NOT a Karen.
The other is a different version of "not a Karen."
And the third can be a Karen sometimes, and has been in the
past.
The name was chosen, I think, because it peaked in the 1960s, so
it denotes someone sort of older, and they're thought of as
fussy. Most Karens are actually a little bit younger.
HTML https://www.babynamewizard.com/voyager#prefix=karen&sw=both&exact=false
[/quote]
I'm so very tired of the Karen memes. Now all the racist over 30
white women are called that also. Yes, my name is Karen, and
it's becoming almost a slur. It gets to the point that you don't
want to introduce yourself. There are a whole lot of men around
named Kevin, but yes Karen is a 60's and 70's name. Really not
that many of us.
[/quote]
I understand your frustration. And I want you to know I don't
associate the name Karen with the personality "A Karen". You
certainly didn't select the name. And when I heard someone
called a "Karen" I knew what it was the instant I heard it. As I
would if she was called <enter another name here>.
I'm sorry, though, that they happened to choose your name.
[/quote]
Thank you for that! It really is getting old, really fast. I'm
so sick of the jokes. It didn't really bother me when it was
just "I want to speak to your manager, NOW" . But it just hurts
me deeply, when all these racist bitches are called "Karen".
Every white woman that behaves like a jackass to people of color
is now named Karen. We were not raised that way, even growing up
in the deep south. I DO realize that I'm taking it really
personally, however, my name IS personal to me.
ETA: I'm almost at the point that I want to switch to my middle
name
[/quote]
My sister is a Karen and has unfortunately sported an inverted
bob for the last 6 years. She is also tired of the meme.
While I'll admit to laughing at the the Tropical Storm Karen
meme's last year, I do find the use sexist and ageist. There is
some basis that the use of Karen did seem to originate in the
African American culture as a slur name for a specific type of
white woman. The first time I really heard it was a couple of
years ago in relation to the white woman who called the police
on the black children running a lemonade stand. But as others
have mentioned, it really came to life in Reddit subcategories.
But I think the idea of how not to be perceived as entitled is
to follow your guidelines and ask for a resolution or issue in a
calm manner. And don't escalate things unnecessarily.
#Post#: 58033--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: holly firestorm Date: September 25, 2020, 1:02 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I posted this on my Facebook page in June: When I was young
there used to be this t-shirt, "B**ch: a kind, gentle-hearted
woman who's been bullied, picked on, abused and dismissed once
too often." It came about because of all the misogynists who
called women "b**ches" any time they 'stepped out of line' or
didn't know their place. Now there's a new slang word "Karen"
which is SUPPOSED to refer to anyone who thinks they're so
special they matter and no one else does. But, since I first
saw it being used, I've NEVER seen if refer to a male*, anyone
who isn't white, in fact, not even someone who's young. If a
male acts like a racist, he's just called a racist. If a woman
acts like a racist, she's a "racist Karen." It seems to me what
that insult really means is "middle aged or older white WOMAN
who doesn't know her place." Especially for all those who hate
being called "snowflake" or "libertard." but call any woman you
don't want to screw and who disagrees with you a "Karen,"
Congratulations, you've shown there's no difference between you
and the racists you've been raging about after all.
* Since then I have seen one or two memes about "Kens" or
"Kevins" but nowhere near the hundreds of "Karen" memes.
Additionally, Some men will gaslight, bully, dismiss a woman for
speaking up, even now. This "Karen" crap is just another way to
put a woman you don't want to play scrabble with in her place.
If a man refuses to wear a mask in a public area he's just
called an ***hole, but, a woman is called a Karen. But, at the
archery range where I shoot we are required by the Park
Department to wear masks when not shooting. They will close us
down if we do not comply with COVID restrictions, including
this. As a Range volunteer I'm supposed to at least ask people
if they have a mask with them. One jerk got nasty about it and
tried to bully me into not saying anything. He's at least 30
years younger than me and had the gall to order me, "I told you
not to talk to me." I 'reported' him to the Archery Facebook
Group (not even the Park Dept.) About 20 people supported me
including 3 instructors, 2 of whom are Club Board members. But,
two "trolls" started in with the insults and veiled threats,
even after the Head Instructor backed me and told them to
behave. Among their insults was calling me a "Karen." Now,
previously one of our male members (B) complained about someone
else who didn't want to wear a mask. These 'trolls' didn't have
a word to say about that. (PS: The trolls were kicked out of
the group and the "I told you not to talk to me," boy was
personally told by the head instructor that I was right and he
was supposed to wear that mask when not shooting.
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
#Post#: 58038--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: Jayhawk Date: September 25, 2020, 1:47 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
My daughter in is college - she calls the frat guys "Chads."
#Post#: 58043--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: Jem Date: September 25, 2020, 2:27 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you had that experience. I know in my group of
friends, we only use the phrase very light heartedly, and it is
actually more often used toward the men in the group. Another
example was a group of us, two men and two women, went to Subway
to get food because we knew we were going to be busy outdoors
for a long time. We each ordered a footlong, half to eat when we
ordered it and half to save for later. One of the men said
something like, "Oh, and can I get the footlong cut into two six
inches and wrapped separately please?" to which the other man
(this was my husband) said, "Wow, Karen," to our friend. Then my
husband said to the sandwich artist, "But actually, that's a
good idea. Is that something you can do?"
I guess my point is that some people use the term to be rude and
derogatory, but others are just lightheartedly commenting to be
funny. In my experience it isn't even directed only to women.
#Post#: 58044--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: chigger Date: September 25, 2020, 2:31 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
I posted this on my Facebook page in June: When I was young
there used to be this t-shirt, "B**ch: a kind, gentle-hearted
woman who's been bullied, picked on, abused and dismissed once
too often." It came about because of all the misogynists who
called women "b**ches" any time they 'stepped out of line' or
didn't know their place. Now there's a new slang word "Karen"
which is SUPPOSED to refer to anyone who thinks they're so
special they matter and no one else does. But, since I first
saw it being used, I've NEVER seen if refer to a male*, anyone
who isn't white, in fact, not even someone who's young. If a
male acts like a racist, he's just called a racist. If a woman
acts like a racist, she's a "racist Karen." It seems to me what
that insult really means is "middle aged or older white WOMAN
who doesn't know her place." Especially for all those who hate
being called "snowflake" or "libertard." but call any woman you
don't want to screw and who disagrees with you a "Karen,"
Congratulations, you've shown there's no difference between you
and the racists you've been raging about after all.
* Since then I have seen one or two memes about "Kens" or
"Kevins" but nowhere near the hundreds of "Karen" memes.
Additionally, Some men will gaslight, bully, dismiss a woman for
speaking up, even now. This "Karen" crap is just another way to
put a woman you don't want to play scrabble with in her place.
If a man refuses to wear a mask in a public area he's just
called an ***hole, but, a woman is called a Karen. But, at the
archery range where I shoot we are required by the Park
Department to wear masks when not shooting. They will close us
down if we do not comply with COVID restrictions, including
this. As a Range volunteer I'm supposed to at least ask people
if they have a mask with them. One jerk got nasty about it and
tried to bully me into not saying anything. He's at least 30
years younger than me and had the gall to order me, "I told you
not to talk to me." I 'reported' him to the Archery Facebook
Group (not even the Park Dept.) About 20 people supported me
including 3 instructors, 2 of whom are Club Board members. But,
two "trolls" started in with the insults and veiled threats,
even after the Head Instructor backed me and told them to
behave. Among their insults was calling me a "Karen." Now,
previously one of our male members (B) complained about someone
else who didn't want to wear a mask. These 'trolls' didn't have
a word to say about that. (PS: The trolls were kicked out of
the group and the "I told you not to talk to me," boy was
personally told by the head instructor that I was right and he
was supposed to wear that mask when not shooting.
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
Yes! The term "A Karen" is sexist, ageist, and truth be told,
racist also! To be a Karen, you have to be female, middle aged,
and white. So tell me that's not a slur! Those of us that carry
that name are starting to find it exhausting, since mainstream
media has picked it up as their new catchphrase.
#Post#: 58046--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: chigger Date: September 25, 2020, 2:42 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1871.msg58043#msg58043
date=1601062077]
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you had that experience. I know in my group of
friends, we only use the phrase very light heartedly, and it is
actually more often used toward the men in the group. Another
example was a group of us, two men and two women, went to Subway
to get food because we knew we were going to be busy outdoors
for a long time. We each ordered a footlong, half to eat when we
ordered it and half to save for later. One of the men said
something like, "Oh, and can I get the footlong cut into two six
inches and wrapped separately please?" to which the other man
(this was my husband) said, "Wow, Karen," to our friend. Then my
husband said to the sandwich artist, "But actually, that's a
good idea. Is that something you can do?"
I guess my point is that some people use the term to be rude and
derogatory, but others are just lightheartedly commenting to be
funny. In my experience it isn't even directed only to women.
[/quote]
But ya'll are still doing it, light hearted or not. Your husband
could have just called your friend a snowflake. Let's say your
name is actually Jem. How would you feel if every headline, with
video showing a woman that fits your demographic, was titled
"Jem threatens black man in central park" or "Jem called the
cops on black child selling lemonade" or "Jem calls police on
black family at pool, says they can't possibly live there". That
is only three examples, but I could go on for many, many more.
Then it becomes any person in your demographic is "A Jem". Then
any person in your demographic that tries to enforce rules is a
"Jem". Tell me how you would feel?
#Post#: 58048--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: NFPwife Date: September 25, 2020, 2:56 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=chigger link=topic=1871.msg58046#msg58046
date=1601062936]
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1871.msg58043#msg58043
date=1601062077]
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you had that experience. I know in my group of
friends, we only use the phrase very light heartedly, and it is
actually more often used toward the men in the group. Another
example was a group of us, two men and two women, went to Subway
to get food because we knew we were going to be busy outdoors
for a long time. We each ordered a footlong, half to eat when we
ordered it and half to save for later. One of the men said
something like, "Oh, and can I get the footlong cut into two six
inches and wrapped separately please?" to which the other man
(this was my husband) said, "Wow, Karen," to our friend. Then my
husband said to the sandwich artist, "But actually, that's a
good idea. Is that something you can do?"
I guess my point is that some people use the term to be rude and
derogatory, but others are just lightheartedly commenting to be
funny. In my experience it isn't even directed only to women.
[/quote]
But ya'll are still doing it, light hearted or not. Your husband
could have just called your friend a snowflake. Let's say your
name is actually Jem. How would you feel if every headline, with
video showing a woman that fits your demographic, was titled
"Jem threatens black man in central park" or "Jem called the
cops on black child selling lemonade" or "Jem calls police on
black family at pool, says they can't possibly live there". That
is only three examples, but I could go on for many, many more.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you're having that experience too.
I didn't think of the racist connotation until I looked at the
dictionary.com listing. The term has evolved to include that,
but, when I come across it, either IRL or online, I find it to
be more of the "I need to see your manager" or "I want
super-special treatment" variety.
I do find it's used to try to stifle women's voices. A
reasonable request or seeking to rectify something puts one at
risk of being dismissed as a Karen. I've found myself, when
making a completely typical, normal customer service request
saying, "Not to be a Karen, but...." In hindsight, I really
didn't like that I did it. Why soften the request or permission
seek when the person who'd been addressing this situation with
me had the facts completely wrong?
There was an AITA on Reddit where the sales force was referring
to all women as Karen. Little girls were "Baby Karens" etc. etc.
They were calling one of the only women in the office Karen. She
started calling all of them Kevin. (Although, based on their
behavior, I would have gone with Chad. I think that's consistent
with how your daughter is using it, Jayhawk.)
"Kevin" stuck with the whole office. The sales team was upset.
The poster said she wasn't dropping Kevin until they'd dropped
Karen and went one week without calling her Karen.
#Post#: 58049--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: Jem Date: September 25, 2020, 2:58 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=chigger link=topic=1871.msg58046#msg58046
date=1601062936]
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1871.msg58043#msg58043
date=1601062077]
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you had that experience. I know in my group of
friends, we only use the phrase very light heartedly, and it is
actually more often used toward the men in the group. Another
example was a group of us, two men and two women, went to Subway
to get food because we knew we were going to be busy outdoors
for a long time. We each ordered a footlong, half to eat when we
ordered it and half to save for later. One of the men said
something like, "Oh, and can I get the footlong cut into two six
inches and wrapped separately please?" to which the other man
(this was my husband) said, "Wow, Karen," to our friend. Then my
husband said to the sandwich artist, "But actually, that's a
good idea. Is that something you can do?"
I guess my point is that some people use the term to be rude and
derogatory, but others are just lightheartedly commenting to be
funny. In my experience it isn't even directed only to women.
[/quote]
But ya'll are still doing it, light hearted or not. Your husband
could have just called your friend a snowflake. Let's say your
name is actually Jem. How would you feel if every headline, with
video showing a woman that fits your demographic, was titled
"Jem threatens black man in central park" or "Jem called the
cops on black child selling lemonade" or "Jem calls police on
black family at pool, says they can't possibly live there". That
is only three examples, but I could go on for many, many more.
Then it becomes any person in your demographic is "A Jem". Then
any person in your demographic that tries to enforce rules is a
"Jem". Tell me how you would feel?
[/quote]
I personally would not likely care, but that's just me. I know I
am not a "Jem" (if this is meant to imply something derogatory)
and people who know me also know that. So if someone thought
negatively about me based on a headline calling someone else a
"Jem" I would really question whether I valued their opinion!
Like I said, I am sorry that some people are having negative
experiences. I think there are all sorts of things some people
say lightheartedly and others say to be mean or derogatory.
Examples include "Becky," "Blondie," "Brutus," etc. I can
generally tell when a person is being lighthearted and when they
are intending to be rude.
#Post#: 58052--------------------------------------------------
Re: Okay Karen
By: chigger Date: September 25, 2020, 3:09 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1871.msg58048#msg58048
date=1601063788]
[quote author=chigger link=topic=1871.msg58046#msg58046
date=1601062936]
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1871.msg58043#msg58043
date=1601062077]
[quote author=holly firestorm link=topic=1871.msg58033#msg58033
date=1601056971]
So, another confirmation that this "Karen" crap has lost its
original meaning and is already being used by "the other side"
to put a woman, especially an older white woman, in her place no
matter what its original meaning was supposed to be.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you had that experience. I know in my group of
friends, we only use the phrase very light heartedly, and it is
actually more often used toward the men in the group. Another
example was a group of us, two men and two women, went to Subway
to get food because we knew we were going to be busy outdoors
for a long time. We each ordered a footlong, half to eat when we
ordered it and half to save for later. One of the men said
something like, "Oh, and can I get the footlong cut into two six
inches and wrapped separately please?" to which the other man
(this was my husband) said, "Wow, Karen," to our friend. Then my
husband said to the sandwich artist, "But actually, that's a
good idea. Is that something you can do?"
I guess my point is that some people use the term to be rude and
derogatory, but others are just lightheartedly commenting to be
funny. In my experience it isn't even directed only to women.
[/quote]
But ya'll are still doing it, light hearted or not. Your husband
could have just called your friend a snowflake. Let's say your
name is actually Jem. How would you feel if every headline, with
video showing a woman that fits your demographic, was titled
"Jem threatens black man in central park" or "Jem called the
cops on black child selling lemonade" or "Jem calls police on
black family at pool, says they can't possibly live there". That
is only three examples, but I could go on for many, many more.
[/quote]
I'm sorry you're having that experience too.
I didn't think of the racist connotation until I looked at the
dictionary.com listing. The term has evolved to include that,
but, when I come across it, either IRL or online, I find it to
be more of the "I need to see your manager" or "I want
super-special treatment" variety.
I do find it's used to try to stifle women's voices. A
reasonable request or seeking to rectify something puts one at
risk of being dismissed as a Karen. I've found myself, when
making a completely typical, normal customer service request
saying, "Not to be a Karen, but...." In hindsight, I really
didn't like that I did it. Why soften the request or permission
seek when the person who'd been addressing this situation with
me had the facts completely wrong?
There was an AITA on Reddit where the sales force was referring
to all women as Karen. Little girls were "Baby Karens" etc. etc.
They were calling one of the only women in the office Karen. She
started calling all of them Kevin. (Although, based on their
behavior, I would have gone with Chad. I think that's consistent
with how your daughter is using it, Jayhawk.)
"Kevin" stuck with the whole office. The sales team was upset.
The poster said she wasn't dropping Kevin until they'd dropped
Karen and went one week without calling her Karen.
[/quote]
Now imagine if your given name is actually Karen.
*****************************************************
DIR Previous Page
DIR Next Page