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#Post#: 56749--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Andi_3k Date: September 1, 2020, 11:00 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
No one is owed a celebration
No one is owed gifts
I would not attend and if I lived in the neighborhood I would
not be please to have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the neighbor
#Post#: 56750--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Aleko Date: September 2, 2020, 2:13 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote]if I lived in the neighborhood I would not be please to
have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the
neighbor[/quote]
I think that’s a bit unfair, because if they were able to have a
physical party you’d have the exact number of cars
arriving[b][/b], and later leaving again. In fact you’d actually
have more nuisance, surely, because in between all these extra
cars would be have to be parked around your street for hours.
#Post#: 56759--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: DaDancingPsych Date: September 2, 2020, 8:21 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Aleko link=topic=1836.msg56750#msg56750
date=1599030804]
[quote]if I lived in the neighborhood I would not be please to
have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the
neighbor[/quote]
I think that’s a bit unfair, because if they were able to have a
physical party you’d have the exact number of cars
arriving[b][/b], and later leaving again. In fact you’d actually
have more nuisance, surely, because in between all these extra
cars would be have to be parked around your street for hours.
[/quote]
I agree. Having any kind of gathering (regular shower or
drive-by) is going to potentially cause some traffic issues.
However, I think that it's important for the party hosts to do
everything that they can to not inconvenience the neighborhood
for either type of party.
I live in a townhouse, so parking can be issue. I can probably
park three cars in front of my home and there are a limited
number of guest spots down the street. Whenever someone has a
gathering of sorts, we simply all work together (even as the
uninvited neighbor) to make the parking work. However, if I was
going to host something for more than a handful of cars, I would
probably reconsider using my home.
Also, I live on a dead-end street. Any drive through or parade
would need to U-turn in front of my home to exit. If I was going
to host this, I would probably work out specific times for each
guest, although even that logistically would be inconvenient to
my neighbors. So, I would probably look into using someone
else's home or a parking lot.
My point? No matter what type of party that you are hosting, you
should always keep your neighbors in mind and make plans that
will work for your neighborhood. Also, everyone's living
situation comes with things that we simply deal with. Sometimes
I have to accept that my neighbors are going to make noise and
that their guests might use a parking spot. But I don't have to
worry about cows getting loose!
#Post#: 56762--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Andi_3k Date: September 2, 2020, 9:10 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=DaDancingPsych link=topic=1836.msg56759#msg56759
date=1599052872]
[quote author=Aleko link=topic=1836.msg56750#msg56750
date=1599030804]
[quote]if I lived in the neighborhood I would not be please to
have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the
neighbor[/quote]
I think that’s a bit unfair, because if they were able to have a
physical party you’d have the exact number of cars
arriving[b][/b], and later leaving again. In fact you’d actually
have more nuisance, surely, because in between all these extra
cars would be have to be parked around your street for hours.
[/quote]
I agree. Having any kind of gathering (regular shower or
drive-by) is going to potentially cause some traffic issues.
However, I think that it's important for the party hosts to do
everything that they can to not inconvenience the neighborhood
for either type of party.
I live in a townhouse, so parking can be issue. I can probably
park three cars in front of my home and there are a limited
number of guest spots down the street. Whenever someone has a
gathering of sorts, we simply all work together (even as the
uninvited neighbor) to make the parking work. However, if I was
going to host something for more than a handful of cars, I would
probably reconsider using my home.
Also, I live on a dead-end street. Any drive through or parade
would need to U-turn in front of my home to exit. If I was going
to host this, I would probably work out specific times for each
guest, although even that logistically would be inconvenient to
my neighbors. So, I would probably look into using someone
else's home or a parking lot.
My point? No matter what type of party that you are hosting, you
should always keep your neighbors in mind and make plans that
will work for your neighborhood. Also, everyone's living
situation comes with things that we simply deal with. Sometimes
I have to accept that my neighbors are going to make noise and
that their guests might use a parking spot. But I don't have to
worry about cows getting loose!
[/quote]
Actually from personal experience- the drive bus are MUCH more
disruption. For a stay in party they park go, in and stay put
for at least a couple of hours- and in that couple of hours, the
neighborhood goes on as normal.. With a drive by normal traffic
AND noise patterns are interrupted for the duration. My
neighborhood has had several parades go through in normal times,
along with road races a business that requires street parking
and we have two neighbors who even during lockdown were having
stay in parties. I have say out of all of that the MOST
disruptive, most complained about and most hated are the drive
by “events” this summer
#Post#: 56779--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Despedina Date: September 2, 2020, 3:27 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
OP Here - yes no more info on the drive through. Its Sept 20
and only 5 people have RSVP'd so far. 2 are siblings to my
cousin and one is my grandma. They prominently displayed where
they are registered on the event site. It does now say "more
info to come" so we'll see. If this is just driving by and
dropping a gift like it portraying itself, then I'll have to
decline. I should also add that this cousin (who is the father
to be) has blown me off a couple of times on things so I'm not
too keen anyway. I think I'd go if it was a traditional event
but this seems cold.
#Post#: 56793--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: DaDancingPsych Date: September 2, 2020, 8:37 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Andi_3k link=topic=1836.msg56762#msg56762
date=1599055815]
[quote author=DaDancingPsych link=topic=1836.msg56759#msg56759
date=1599052872]
[quote author=Aleko link=topic=1836.msg56750#msg56750
date=1599030804]
[quote]if I lived in the neighborhood I would not be please to
have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the
neighbor[/quote]
I think that’s a bit unfair, because if they were able to have a
physical party you’d have the exact number of cars
arriving[b][/b], and later leaving again. In fact you’d actually
have more nuisance, surely, because in between all these extra
cars would be have to be parked around your street for hours.
[/quote]
I agree. Having any kind of gathering (regular shower or
drive-by) is going to potentially cause some traffic issues.
However, I think that it's important for the party hosts to do
everything that they can to not inconvenience the neighborhood
for either type of party.
I live in a townhouse, so parking can be issue. I can probably
park three cars in front of my home and there are a limited
number of guest spots down the street. Whenever someone has a
gathering of sorts, we simply all work together (even as the
uninvited neighbor) to make the parking work. However, if I was
going to host something for more than a handful of cars, I would
probably reconsider using my home.
Also, I live on a dead-end street. Any drive through or parade
would need to U-turn in front of my home to exit. If I was going
to host this, I would probably work out specific times for each
guest, although even that logistically would be inconvenient to
my neighbors. So, I would probably look into using someone
else's home or a parking lot.
My point? No matter what type of party that you are hosting, you
should always keep your neighbors in mind and make plans that
will work for your neighborhood. Also, everyone's living
situation comes with things that we simply deal with. Sometimes
I have to accept that my neighbors are going to make noise and
that their guests might use a parking spot. But I don't have to
worry about cows getting loose!
[/quote]
Actually from personal experience- the drive bus are MUCH more
disruption. For a stay in party they park go, in and stay put
for at least a couple of hours- and in that couple of hours, the
neighborhood goes on as normal.. With a drive by normal traffic
AND noise patterns are interrupted for the duration. My
neighborhood has had several parades go through in normal times,
along with road races a business that requires street parking
and we have two neighbors who even during lockdown were having
stay in parties. I have say out of all of that the MOST
disruptive, most complained about and most hated are the drive
by “events” this summer
[/quote]
I think different settings will bring different levels of
disruption and that some types of parties may be more or less
disruptive to different types of neighborhoods (which is what I
was trying to say.) I'm with you. A drive-by shower in my
situation (described above) would be a nightmare. However, my
previous living apartment would have probably done better with
the drive-by as parking was impossible when someone didn't have
extra guests. But as I stated above, I think that the host
should be thoughtful of what inconveniences that may be bringing
to their neighbors.
#Post#: 56820--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Hmmm Date: September 3, 2020, 10:18 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Andi_3k link=topic=1836.msg56762#msg56762
date=1599055815]
[quote author=DaDancingPsych link=topic=1836.msg56759#msg56759
date=1599052872]
[quote author=Aleko link=topic=1836.msg56750#msg56750
date=1599030804]
[quote]if I lived in the neighborhood I would not be please to
have two hours or so of drive bying
I would actually consider my neighbors very rude to do this and
depending on how badly it impacted the access in and out of my
neighborhood— it might just color my opinion of the
neighbor[/quote]
I think that’s a bit unfair, because if they were able to have a
physical party you’d have the exact number of cars
arriving[b][/b], and later leaving again. In fact you’d actually
have more nuisance, surely, because in between all these extra
cars would be have to be parked around your street for hours.
[/quote]
I agree. Having any kind of gathering (regular shower or
drive-by) is going to potentially cause some traffic issues.
However, I think that it's important for the party hosts to do
everything that they can to not inconvenience the neighborhood
for either type of party.
I live in a townhouse, so parking can be issue. I can probably
park three cars in front of my home and there are a limited
number of guest spots down the street. Whenever someone has a
gathering of sorts, we simply all work together (even as the
uninvited neighbor) to make the parking work. However, if I was
going to host something for more than a handful of cars, I would
probably reconsider using my home.
Also, I live on a dead-end street. Any drive through or parade
would need to U-turn in front of my home to exit. If I was going
to host this, I would probably work out specific times for each
guest, although even that logistically would be inconvenient to
my neighbors. So, I would probably look into using someone
else's home or a parking lot.
My point? No matter what type of party that you are hosting, you
should always keep your neighbors in mind and make plans that
will work for your neighborhood. Also, everyone's living
situation comes with things that we simply deal with. Sometimes
I have to accept that my neighbors are going to make noise and
that their guests might use a parking spot. But I don't have to
worry about cows getting loose!
[/quote]
Actually from personal experience- the drive bus are MUCH more
disruption. For a stay in party they park go, in and stay put
for at least a couple of hours- and in that couple of hours, the
neighborhood goes on as normal.. With a drive by normal traffic
AND noise patterns are interrupted for the duration. My
neighborhood has had several parades go through in normal times,
along with road races a business that requires street parking
and we have two neighbors who even during lockdown were having
stay in parties. I have say out of all of that the MOST
disruptive, most complained about and most hated are the drive
by “events” this summer
[/quote]
We've had a few of the graduation celebration, bday and other
"parade" events. We live close to the elementary school which
seems to be the popular staging and decorating area for these
events. They are noisy for about 10 minutes in front of my house
but I'm fine with it.
But this event does not sound like a "parade" style where
everyone drives by at the same time since it is occuring over a
2 hour window. Unless there is 50 or more cars coming by over
that 2 hours, I don't see how it could be that disruptive to
neighbors.
#Post#: 57373--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: Despedina Date: September 14, 2020, 2:46 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
OP again. I received a paper invitation in the mail last week.
The details are that the drive up will be between 1 and 3, the
registry locations were on the invitation and it was noted that
you would receive a "sweet treat". I declined. I feel badly that
cousin's wife is pregnant during COVID but if I were me I'd
almost just have a small get together or wait until after the
baby was born.
#Post#: 57377--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: violinp Date: September 14, 2020, 4:00 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Despedina link=topic=1836.msg57373#msg57373
date=1600112776]
OP again. I received a paper invitation in the mail last week.
The details are that the drive up will be between 1 and 3, the
registry locations were on the invitation and it was noted that
you would receive a "sweet treat". I declined. I feel badly that
cousin's wife is pregnant during COVID but if I were me I'd
almost just have a small get together or wait until after the
baby was born.
[/quote]
I mean, that's assuming that they feel comfortable having people
over with a newborn who doesn't have as strong an immune system,
plus everyone is gonna want to hug and kiss the baby, and you
don't want to make the great - aunt or mom's friend or whomever
mad by saying, "Sorry, no touching, only looking," because then
you'll have "ruined" the party by putting your foot down about
your own kid. Even if you have a burgeoning cold sore, kissing
the baby can make him or her quite sick or even die.
For my part, I have no problem both having a party after (which
I in fact am) and telling people no, but I also don't have
family or friends living close who are disrespectful of me or my
boundaries to the point that they would pout or make a scene
over that. And it's easy to say, "Well, just don't invite them,"
but when you're newly postpartum, you reaaaallly don't want to
kick off World War 5 in your family because you said, "Well, but
Johnny's just a month old, so I don't feel comfortable with
that." You're already dealing with recovering from a huge
physical event that may or may not have included major abdominal
surgery, you're trying to keep a growing human alive, your
emotions and hormones are all over the place...it's unfair to
place that kind of burden on a mom, especially a first - time
mom.
I had a Zoom shower because a group of friends I met online
wanted me to at least have some kind of celebration before DS
gets here. They shipped everything to me and I opened things on
camera and showed them off, and it was nice. But it seems silly,
if everyone lives in the same place, to pay to ship things to
the pregnant mom's house. I wouldn't mind the drop off at all.
These are challenging and different times. It's not merely a
gift grab to try and make what should be a normal and happy
thing as normal as possible.
Frankly, it was a bit disheartening to see other people on this
forum accuse moms who are trying to make a shower work by any
means possible of being greedy or just out to get stuff, as if
said moms have a whit of control over this situation, and indeed
may have less money than they normally would to try and make
things work to get baby things. Baby showers, at least in the
States, have been a very normal thing for quite some time, and
COVID, while necessitating changes for safety reasons, is not a
reason to scorn moms who are trying to keep some semblance of
normal. :-\
#Post#: 57379--------------------------------------------------
Re: Drive Through Baby Shower
By: DaDancingPsych Date: September 14, 2020, 4:45 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=violinp link=topic=1836.msg57377#msg57377
date=1600117238]
I had a Zoom shower because a group of friends I met online
wanted me to at least have some kind of celebration before DS
gets here. They shipped everything to me and I opened things on
camera and showed them off, and it was nice. But it seems silly,
if everyone lives in the same place, to pay to ship things to
the pregnant mom's house. I wouldn't mind the drop off at all.
These are challenging and different times. It's not merely a
gift grab to try and make what should be a normal and happy
thing as normal as possible.
[/quote]
Your Zoom shower sounds like it was lovely! Even as someone who
is totally Zoomed out, I think that this would be quite
enjoyable.
I think that this could even be done for a shower were everyone
was local. They could still have a gift drop-off of some sorts
or people could ship the gifts if desired. I wonder if this
would satisfy some of those who think the drive-by option is a
gift-grab?
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