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#Post#: 55586--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: NFPwife Date: August 4, 2020, 10:58 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=TootsNYC link=topic=1811.msg55583#msg55583
date=1596554734]
[quote] Barbara is upset not by the close proximity (in fact it
was Barbara who came into close proximity of LOP for the photo)
but instead she is upset that *other people* might be upset that
she was in close proximity.
[/quote]
I think that's legit, though. In today's world, especially.
[/quote]
Very legit. Personally, I'd see the picture, wouldn't respond
with a reaction and wouldn't comment. But, I would make a mental
note and avoid everyone in the picture. The restrictions in the
area still call for social distancing and that's not being
observed; if anyone in the picture called or wanted to do
something, it'd be an automatic "No." So, personally, I'd prefer
the picture stay up. It helps me know how people are behaving
and I can adjust my decisions about interacting with them
accordingly.
#Post#: 55587--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: Jem Date: August 4, 2020, 11:19 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1811.msg55586#msg55586
date=1596556693]
[quote author=TootsNYC link=topic=1811.msg55583#msg55583
date=1596554734]
[quote] Barbara is upset not by the close proximity (in fact it
was Barbara who came into close proximity of LOP for the photo)
but instead she is upset that *other people* might be upset that
she was in close proximity.
[/quote]
I think that's legit, though. In today's world, especially.
[/quote]
Very legit. Personally, I'd see the picture, wouldn't respond
with a reaction and wouldn't comment. But, I would make a mental
note and avoid everyone in the picture. The restrictions in the
area still call for social distancing and that's not being
observed; if anyone in the picture called or wanted to do
something, it'd be an automatic "No." So, personally, I'd prefer
the picture stay up. It helps me know how people are behaving
and I can adjust my decisions about interacting with them
accordingly.
[/quote]
Yes, which is why I found Barbara's request to be hypocritical.
#Post#: 55588--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: Jem Date: August 4, 2020, 11:22 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=1811.msg55585#msg55585
date=1596555753]
That kind of thing, especially from community leaders, leads
others to think that the precautions aren't really that
important -- after all, if they're going out for ice cream, I
guess I can go to a restaurant/salon/gym ...
[/quote]
If the local recommendations allow for people to go for ice
cream, or to a restaurant, salon, gym or ____, then there is
nothing wrong with people engaging in those activities. An
individual can choose to not engage in such activities, or can
decide to not be around other people for whatever reason, but I
think it is unfair to act as though people doing what the
guidelines allow are somehow "bad."
#Post#: 55590--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: NFPwife Date: August 4, 2020, 11:55 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1811.msg55587#msg55587
date=1596557959]
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1811.msg55586#msg55586
date=1596556693]
[quote author=TootsNYC link=topic=1811.msg55583#msg55583
date=1596554734]
[quote] Barbara is upset not by the close proximity (in fact it
was Barbara who came into close proximity of LOP for the photo)
but instead she is upset that *other people* might be upset that
she was in close proximity.
[/quote]
I think that's legit, though. In today's world, especially.
[/quote]
Very legit. Personally, I'd see the picture, wouldn't respond
with a reaction and wouldn't comment. But, I would make a mental
note and avoid everyone in the picture. The restrictions in the
area still call for social distancing and that's not being
observed; if anyone in the picture called or wanted to do
something, it'd be an automatic "No." So, personally, I'd prefer
the picture stay up. It helps me know how people are behaving
and I can adjust my decisions about interacting with them
accordingly.
[/quote]
Yes, which is why I found Barbara's request to be hypocritical.
[/quote]
Agree. She wants to violate social distancing but not let anyone
know that she is, it's about impression management for her. If
she's not following, she should own it.
(I can't stress enough that those of us who are following the
guidelines don't want the edited and curated version that gives
a false appearance of compliance.)
#Post#: 55593--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: Amara Date: August 4, 2020, 12:54 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
If you like the photo that much, print it out, frame it and
display it. Maybe offer a copy to Barbara as well.
#Post#: 55595--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: Gellchom Date: August 4, 2020, 1:17 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1811.msg55588#msg55588
date=1596558142]
[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=1811.msg55585#msg55585
date=1596555753]
That kind of thing, especially from community leaders, leads
others to think that the precautions aren't really that
important -- after all, if they're going out for ice cream, I
guess I can go to a restaurant/salon/gym ...
[/quote]
If the local recommendations allow for people to go for ice
cream, or to a restaurant, salon, gym or ____, then there is
nothing wrong with people engaging in those activities. An
individual can choose to not engage in such activities, or can
decide to not be around other people for whatever reason, but I
think it is unfair to act as though people doing what the
guidelines allow are somehow "bad."
[/quote]
I didn’t say (or think) that they were “bad.” I don’t think
that’s a fair characterization of my post.
The recommendations at that time were to stay home except for
essential reasons. There were not legal prohibitions, though,
so I guess you could say going for ice cream was “allowed.”
But that doesn’t make it good practice or responsible. Coughing
out into the air is “allowed,” too, as are plenty of things that
are much more inconsiderate, selfish, dangerous, and
irresponsible than making nonessential outings.
Anyway, as I thought I made clear in my post, I don’t think they
did anything wrong in going for that ice cream. Sometimes you
just have to make an exception. I do, too. I just thought they
shouldn’t have made a point of advertising it. Which is kind of
what I think about the OP’s story. It’s not anything awful or
“bad,” but it’s not what I think we should be modeling and
encouraging, either.
#Post#: 55607--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: oogyda Date: August 4, 2020, 6:54 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=1811.msg55595#msg55595
date=1596565034]
[quote author=Jem link=topic=1811.msg55588#msg55588
date=1596558142]
[quote author=Gellchom link=topic=1811.msg55585#msg55585
date=1596555753]
That kind of thing, especially from community leaders, leads
others to think that the precautions aren't really that
important -- after all, if they're going out for ice cream, I
guess I can go to a restaurant/salon/gym ...
[/quote]
If the local recommendations allow for people to go for ice
cream, or to a restaurant, salon, gym or ____, then there is
nothing wrong with people engaging in those activities. An
individual can choose to not engage in such activities, or can
decide to not be around other people for whatever reason, but I
think it is unfair to act as though people doing what the
guidelines allow are somehow "bad."
[/quote]
I didn’t say (or think) that they were “bad.” I don’t think
that’s a fair characterization of my post.
The recommendations at that time were to stay home except for
essential reasons. There were not legal prohibitions, though,
so I guess you could say going for ice cream was “allowed.”
But that doesn’t make it good practice or responsible. Coughing
out into the air is “allowed,” too, as are plenty of things that
are much more inconsiderate, selfish, dangerous, and
irresponsible than making nonessential outings.
Anyway, as I thought I made clear in my post, I don’t think they
did anything wrong in going for that ice cream. Sometimes you
just have to make an exception. I do, too. I just thought they
shouldn’t have made a point of advertising it. Which is kind of
what I think about the OP’s story. It’s not anything awful or
“bad,” but it’s not what I think we should be modeling and
encouraging, either.
[/quote]
I disagree with the bolded. Just because it wasn't illegal,
does not mean it was "allowed".....at all.
And I do think what that family did was "bad". Going for ice
cream is not essential. And it certainly didn't take all of
them to get the ice cream especially since only dad went in the
shop. And more especially since they took it home to eat!
#Post#: 55730--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: LifeOnPluto Date: August 8, 2020, 12:09 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1811.msg55575#msg55575
date=1596551291]
I also don't find her text terse at all. She said please and
explained why she was asking. Curious how you would have
preferred her to make her request.
[/quote]
Fair question. I guess if I were in Barbara's shoes, I'd at
least try to acknowledge the inconvenience to the photo-owner,
and own my part for not speaking up in the moment. I'd probably
say something like "Hey, I'm sorry to do this, as I know you're
a big fan of [Star Trek], but would you mind removing the photo
of us by [Landmark]? I should have said something at the time,
but on reflection I'm just a bit concerned that it shows us not
social distancing."
[quote author=TootsNYC link=topic=1811.msg55580#msg55580
date=1596554367]
She may also have been quite comfortable with the lack of
distance, given the cases in your city, and given what she knows
about your habits.
She may have just not wanted to face snarky backlash from people
who didn't have the background info she did, and who were
looking to be judgmental.
[/quote]
This is a fair point too, but in that case, I wish she'd simply
untagged herself. My Facebook privacy settings are set to the
highest level, and the number of mutual Facebook friends we have
is very low (ie you can count on one hand). If she'd untagged
herself, none of her own Facebook friends would have been able
to see it. I suspect the chances of anyone else identifying
Barbara (let alone going out of their way to criticise her) were
fairly minimal (but obviously, you never know, which is why I
took it down!).
#Post#: 55757--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: TootsNYC Date: August 8, 2020, 2:03 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
untagging is still not a guarantee
#Post#: 55765--------------------------------------------------
Re: Friend told me to remove Facebook photo as it depicts us not
socially distancing
By: oogyda Date: August 8, 2020, 8:15 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
Edit the photo to blur her face or somehow crop her out. This
[s]seems to be[/s] is important to you to have a photo by this
thing and I get why you'd want to show it off a little.
I won't assign ill will to Barbara. I'm assuming she was
perfectly comfortable with the distance in the moment, but
realized she could be deeply criticized for it later. It's too
bad nobody thought of getting a photo of just you with it.
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