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       #Post#: 54756--------------------------------------------------
       Advice about a personal text
       By: Codewoman1125 Date: July 20, 2020, 4:24 pm
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       I have a coworker working at home during the pandemic. Said
       coworker's performance has been unreliable since we all began
       working from home. I've since returned to work and in the last
       month or so, coworker's performance has really become an issue.
       I'm being asked to attend meetings about topics that were
       previously managed only by co-worker, though my boss claims it's
       just to get my valuable input. Coworker and I are at the same
       level, but I perform many duties coworker could not due to
       skills issues.
       My question is about a personal text from coworker that stated a
       member of the family had sabotaged coworker's at home work
       environment due to a personal disagreement. According to
       coworker, this family member has a substance abuse issue.
       I haven't revealed this message to my employer, but I'm
       wondering if I should. What do you think?
       #Post#: 54761--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Wanaca Date: July 20, 2020, 8:30 pm
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       I would redirect by telling the coworker that they should
       discuss it with their supervisor.  Other than that, I'd stay out
       of it.
       #Post#: 54762--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: MinMom3 Date: July 20, 2020, 8:34 pm
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       Are they going to tell work themselves?  Are they telling you to
       manipulate you into doing even more of their job?  Are you in
       danger of having yet more of their workload landed on you by
       your boss?  Are you maxing out and unable to take any more of
       their work load?  Are you going to get any more money for doing
       part of their job?
       I am in no way a manager...  I think what you do depends on the
       workplace culture and atmosphere, your relationship with your
       supervisor, etc.  I can see telling them, and not telling
       them...
       #Post#: 54765--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Rain Date: July 20, 2020, 8:55 pm
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       [quote author=Wanaca link=topic=1786.msg54761#msg54761
       date=1595295037]
       I would redirect by telling the coworker that they should
       discuss it with their supervisor.  Other than that, I'd stay out
       of it.
       [/quote]
       I totally agree with this.
       #Post#: 54770--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Aleko Date: July 21, 2020, 2:18 am
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       [quote]I would redirect by telling the coworker that they should
       discuss it with their supervisor.  Other than that, I'd stay out
       of it.[/quote]
       I also agree. Your colleague has not asked you to pass this
       information on, and you have no evidence for the truth of it.
       I’m not saying that they were lying: but they might well have
       exaggerated quite a bit, as one sometimes does when trying to
       get sympathy from an equal, and even if it is 100% true they
       might understandably be very unwilling to air their family’s
       dirty linen to authority. I think you should not only advise
       them to discuss it directly with their supervisor but also state
       explicitly that you aren’t going to pass the information on to
       anyone.
       #Post#: 54773--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Rose Red Date: July 21, 2020, 7:13 am
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       Don't pass it on. Don't do it. I can't say that enough.
       Even though it's about how her work is affected, it's still
       personal information. Perhaps you can suggest they talk to each
       other and encourage your coworker to tell them she needs an
       office environment. Or tell your boss how extra work affects
       you. But don't speak for your coworker.
       #Post#: 54781--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: oogyda Date: July 21, 2020, 10:50 am
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       Why would you pass on this message to your/her boss?
       Are you trying to save her from losing her job?  Why?
       Especially since you are being expected to take up her slack
       (regardless of her situation).
       #Post#: 54784--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: July 21, 2020, 1:23 pm
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       I do feel for Coworker. However, I agree that this is Coworker's
       issue to care for you. You can encourage them to bring this to
       Manager's attention. But I just don't see how you being the
       middle man is really going to solve much. I do wonder why you
       are back to work (back to the office?), but coworker is still
       working from home? Would it be appropriate for you to suggest to
       coworker that working from the office might solve the problem?
       In your shoes, I would focus on my plate. It sounds like Manager
       is aware of the performance issue and is hopefully caring for
       it. (Manager may even be aware of the sabotage.) If you are able
       to continue helping out, great. However, I would keep Manager
       afloat of where you are work load wise. Speak up if / when it
       becomes too much.
       #Post#: 54788--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Jem Date: July 21, 2020, 2:14 pm
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       I'm a little unclear on the facts but it sounds like your work
       already knows about your coworkers situation. It sounds to me as
       though your employer is asking you to pick up the slack while
       your coworkers situation gets resolved. It sounds to me as
       though your employer didn't tell you the personal/private
       information about your coworker, and that your coworker told you
       directly, but it does NOT sound to me as though your employer is
       unaware of what is going on with the coworker.
       Like PPs, I don't think it's your place to tell your employer
       what your coworker told you. I DO think it makes sense to seek
       clarification on your role going forward and whether you are
       taking over additional responsibilities.
       #Post#: 54792--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Advice about a personal text
       By: Hmmm Date: July 21, 2020, 2:32 pm
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       I agree with Jem. Based on your post, my immediate thought was
       that boss is aware and was asking you to pick up some slack
       while co-worker is dealing with some personal issues. Boss just
       didn't tell you why.
       I know many dislike being asked to pick up slack when other
       co-workers are under performing for personal reasons. However, I
       am of the opinion that at some time in all of our careers, we'll
       end up with situations where we can't be performing at our
       highest performance. It's nice to know others will have you
       back.
       Unless this is severely over taxing your ability to get things
       done or your suddenly working 50 hours or more with no
       additional compensation, I'd just do as much as I could and see
       it as a way to expand my knowledge or just organizational
       awareness if you are participating in meetings you've not prior
       been exposed to.
       If this does start impacting your performance or home life, I'd
       mention to boss that you're happy to help out but will need some
       assistance in prioritization.
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