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#Post#: 52857--------------------------------------------------
Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: sandisadie
Date: June 9, 2020, 1:41 pm
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I'm curious about this topic. I understand that family members
should be thanked from time to time. But should other members
of the family thank an adult member for doing stuff like putting
the clean dishes away out of the drain rack and the dishwasher?
How about something like vacuuming and dusting? What about
spending almost 2 hours, like I did the other day, putting
things away in our shop building and vacuuming the place?
Cutting the grass, like I did this a.m.? Sweeping down the
driveway and walkways. Spraying the weeds or weeding the flower
beds? These are all chores that I do on a regular basis. Other
adults in the household don't thank me for any of this. I don't
expect them to because this is some of how I contribute to the
wellbeing of this household. On the other hand, a member of the
household is regularly thanked by their spouse whenever they do
anything around here. I don't thank this person usually, unless
they have helped me personally or done something I requested
them to do. I'm not upset about this, but I wonder what others
think about how much thanks a person needs when completing
ordinary tasks?
#Post#: 52858--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: GardenGal
Date: June 9, 2020, 2:11 pm
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I'm a big believer in saying thank you as often as possible to
let people know that I appreciate them, although I don't always
expect to be thanked unless I've gone out of my way to do
something special. For example, I do all the cooking and my DH
does the dishes and most other cleaning. This has worked for us
for 51 years. I try to always thank him a) because I appreciate
it and b) to keep him motivated to keep on doing it without me
having to bug him about it.
A few weeks ago I started thanking him especially when he did a
really good job of cleaning the kitchen counters, which he had
been doing a mostly adequate job of for a while. Now he puts
extra effort into this task and I love it!
We used to have a cleaning woman come in twice a month, but due
to COVID-19 we had to stop that in mid-March, so we're both
doing more stuff that we haven't done in years. It's great to
have us both on board with splitting up the extra work, and I
don't think it would have been so easy to do this if he hadn't
felt appreciated for what he's been doing for the last 5
decades. ;D
#Post#: 52860--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: Jem
Date: June 9, 2020, 2:41 pm
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I agree with GardenGal. I thank my husband and daughter
regularly for normal every day tasks, and they thank me also. I
am a big believer in positive reinforcement.
#Post#: 52864--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: Lilipons
Date: June 9, 2020, 4:44 pm
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People, especially people with whom you live should always be
thanked for things they do, no matter how small.
I always say ‘please’ when Mr. Pons offers me a top-up on my
coffee cup and a ‘thank you’ when he does or when he offers me
an orange to share. He does the same when I take the plate from
his breakfast bagel out to the sink to wash. It’s just the sort
of social lubricant that makes life a little bit nicer.
Life within a household is very much like the relationship
within a business. The share of work between partners isn’t
50/50, it’s 100/100. Those involved should be prepared to
provide as much support to each other as needed. ‘Please’ and
‘Thank you’ go a long way in that regard.
#Post#: 52869--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: andi
Date: June 9, 2020, 9:09 pm
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We say “ please” and “thank you” around our house - not to be
overly formal or snooty, but in acknowledgement of what everyone
contributes. My son is 15 and he does it too - so it must be
pretty standard between hubby and I! It’s just a nice gesture
#Post#: 52871--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: pierrotlunaire0
Date: June 9, 2020, 10:02 pm
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I agree with the general consensus. It's my way of saying, "I
see you and acknowledge your effort to keep this household
running, even if you do it every day. I appreciate it."
#Post#: 52872--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: Luci
Date: June 9, 2020, 10:04 pm
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We say "please" and "thank you" a lot here,too. It’s often in
the form of, "the lawn looks great" or "yea! It’s light in
here", but it’s still "thank you". I thought we are weird.
Thanks for bringing this up.
#Post#: 52876--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: wonderfullyanonymous
Date: June 9, 2020, 10:40 pm
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I'm a big thank you person, too. Even if it's a picking up of a
few things off the floor. In my opinion, it makes the other
person feel good and more apt to help more.
#Post#: 52879--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: NFPwife
Date: June 9, 2020, 11:55 pm
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I also say "Thank you" for everyday chores. When I'm thanked, I
say "You're welcome." I think it's just common courtesy and I
agree that it makes people feel appreciated and more likely to
do something without being asked. (My husband thanks at the same
frequency.)
#Post#: 52883--------------------------------------------------
Re: Thanking Adults For Doing Ordinary Tasks Around the House
DIR By: Aleko
Date: June 10, 2020, 3:24 am
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I'd widen the definition just a bit from 'thanking' to 'showing
your appreciation'. I say that because I know a few people who
are so completely hung up on the specific words 'please' and
'thank you' that if you were to ask them 'Would you be so very
kind as to...' they gripe that you didn't actually say "please".
If I bring DH a cup of tea in bed in the morning, and he sits up
and says 'You made the tea! That's sweet of you!', or I make his
favourite cake and he says, 'oh, woo, coffee and walnut!
Lovely!', we both take that response as sincere thanks, even
though the actual word may not have been uttered.
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