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       #Post#: 45255--------------------------------------------------
       The Preemptive Thank You
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: January 10, 2020, 9:28 am
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       I made a mistake and I am not sure if I should correct it. I
       work with children and receive Christmas gifts from some of the
       kiddos. Beyond being the appropriate thing to do, my employer
       also requires me to write a thank you note for each gift
       received. Families with multiple children, will often give me
       one gift from all. However, I have always written separate notes
       to each child. (Every kid loves receiving their own note and
       that allows me to personalize them to each child.)
       The Smith’s previously were one of those families who sent me
       one gift from both children. During my last week with the kids
       prior to the holiday, I saw the older Smith child (11 years old)
       on my first night of the week. No gift was given. On my second
       night, the younger Smith did bring a gift, but the tag read
       “From: Younger Smith”. Did they forget Older’s name? Was the
       gift only from Younger? I pondered what to do. I decided to
       write both Older and Younger a note. In Younger’s, I
       specifically mentioned the gift. In Older’s, I thanked her for
       always having holiday spirit, but never mentioned anything
       materialistic. I figured that if the gift was meant to be from
       both or just Younger that I would be covered this way.
       I waited to deliver Older’s note until she was walking out the
       door to go home (the next time that I saw her.) I figured that
       if another gift was coming that I would receive it prior to then
       (but really was not anticipating anything.) I handed Older her
       note and her face was funny. (The kids know what the notes are.)
       She then disappeared and returned with a gift for me and the tag
       read “From: Older Smith”. Opps! I basically gave her a thank you
       note before I received the gift (and a bad one at that as it did
       not actually mention the gift!)
       What would be the polite thing to do? Should I write a follow-up
       note and mention the gift? (Older would get two notes and
       younger only one.) Does my original note count even if it was
       delivered at the wrong time? Should I write another note, but
       more apologize and explain myself? (At 11 she might get it.) I
       don't want to seem ungrateful or that I expect gifts. (Actually,
       I wish families would not waste their money on me.) Thoughts?
       #Post#: 45257--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Preemptive Thank You
       By: gramma dishes Date: January 10, 2020, 9:49 am
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       Personally I think you're good.   You did write a note even
       though you assumed there would be no accompanying gift and that
       was very, very nice of you.  Above and beyond.
       If you were to write a second note at this point, it might seem
       that you were pointing out that Older Smith had perhaps
       forgotten to give you his/her gift in a timely fashion.  You
       wouldn't be wrong to write a perhaps "corrected" note, but if it
       were me I'd let it go.
       #Post#: 45258--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Preemptive Thank You
       By: bopper Date: January 10, 2020, 10:11 am
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       I would not send another note, but tell her "It was kind of
       funny that I gave you a thank you note before the gift...but I
       thought the gift <younger sibling> was maybe from the both of
       you. Once again thank you so much for the <gift>, I can't wait
       to <use gift>."
       #Post#: 45260--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Preemptive Thank You
       By: Hmmm Date: January 10, 2020, 10:35 am
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       I agree with Bopper. That is how I would handle it.
       But I'm curious, did the gift tag have your name on it? Is it
       possible that she decided upon receiving your thank you note,
       that she needed to give you a gift? Do you work with Older
       sibling as much as you do with Younger sibling?
       #Post#: 45267--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Preemptive Thank You
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: January 10, 2020, 12:29 pm
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       [quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1578.msg45260#msg45260
       date=1578674117]
       I agree with Bopper. That is how I would handle it.
       But I'm curious, did the gift tag have your name on it? Is it
       possible that she decided upon receiving your thank you note,
       that she needed to give you a gift? Do you work with Older
       sibling as much as you do with Younger sibling?
       [/quote]
       I am 90% sure that the gift tag had my name on it.
       My note may have reminded her that she *needed to give me the
       gift and that may have been the funny the face that I got. "Oh
       yeah! I need to give Da her gift!" I don't think my note made
       anyone go out get my a gift. (I handed her the note. She walked
       out of the room and into the cloakroom. She instantly returned
       with the gift.)
       *Needed as in she probably forgot to give it to me holiday week,
       almost forgot note week, but the note jogged her memory.
       I basically work the same amount with both siblings. Because
       Older sibling is... well... older, her time with me is slightly
       longer. (This would be true with all kids of her age.) And I've
       known Older sibling slightly longer, because I've worked with
       her since she was Younger sister's age. No really the interacts
       are quite similar. (The gifts were also similar/complimentary.)
       #Post#: 45361--------------------------------------------------
       Re: The Preemptive Thank You
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: January 12, 2020, 10:45 am
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       Thanks everyone! I have decided that I am good as far as the
       thank you note. Your thoughts were quite reassuring!
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