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#Post#: 43226--------------------------------------------------
Re: "it is time to back off a little bit" (death menti
oned)
By: TootsNYC Date: December 5, 2019, 10:02 am
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[quote]So... Wow. An in-law responded to brother's email
inquiring about having sisters ashes sent to the States. In law
asked for some ashes to be put in their family plot next to
sister's husband and sister's name would be engrave there too.
Fine.
In-law also said a friend of sister's wants some of sister's
ashes sent to friend's friend in Hawaii. Friend's friend will
have a ceremony and spread the ashes.[/quote]
This is reminding me--I'm going to have to say: If I'm ever
cremated, I don't want people dividing up my ashes as if they're
souvenirs.
I think it's great that you have an indicator of what your
sister would want.
And I'm with you on the idea of insisting on those wishes being
carried out.
#Post#: 43260--------------------------------------------------
Re: "it is time to back off a little bit" (death menti
oned)
By: Isisnin Date: December 5, 2019, 7:37 pm
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Just to clarify, I do know that family contact and next of kin
probably do not have legal standing and that they are not the
same as executioner of the estate/will. The estate is not really
in play now as (I imagine) legal filings have to be made and
court dates set up. I just want to communicate to the attorney
that sister has final expenses here in the States too. Whether
or not the American expenses can be paid from the estate - we
ain't got no idea. We can't communicate with the designated
executioner since we don't know who that is. I assume the
attorney does. What he (the attorney) does with our
communication is up to him. But at least we (sister's immediate
family) open up the communication.
So I've been very busy practicing diplomacy, both verbal and
written. There seems to be some calmness settling in. I really
hope so.
TootsNYC, you are so right. I told my brother that after this is
all over, I will legally write up my final wishes and that they
will include that my ashes will not be divided up like a pie on
a Thanksgiving table.
#Post#: 43601--------------------------------------------------
Re: "it is time to back off a little bit" (death menti
oned)
By: Girlie Date: December 11, 2019, 12:47 pm
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I much prefer burial to cremation, and that's one of the
reasons. What anyone else does is up to them, but I don't like
the idea of being divided up, either.
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