DIR Return Create A Forum - Home
---------------------------------------------------------
Bad Manners and Brimstone
HTML https://badmanners.createaforum.com
---------------------------------------------------------
*****************************************************
DIR Return to: Life in General
*****************************************************
#Post#: 42257--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: Hanna Date: November 18, 2019, 6:35 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1408.msg42219#msg42219
date=1574099497]
[quote author=Hanna link=topic=1408.msg42214#msg42214
date=1574097830]
[quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1408.msg42211#msg42211
date=1574097200]
[quote author=Despedina link=topic=1408.msg42210#msg42210
date=1574096046]
I worked at a grocery store where we were told to use the
customer's name if we could see it on a credit card or check. I
hated doing it. I didn't know these people and many had uncommon
german and french last names that were not easy to pronounce.
In those cases we were told to ask how to pronounce their name
then say "Have a nice day Mr. Whatsyername". I had 2 customers
that told me it was unnecessary and strange for me to address
them by name as we didn't know each other. One lady seemed very
offended. I never used personal names after that.
[/quote]
This makes me a little sad. Other customers either didn't mind
it or liked being addressed by name. But because 2 complained,
all the others lost this little bit of humanity.
[/quote]
I strongly dislike it when someone reads my name from my debit
card or check and uses it to pretend we are on familiar terms
when I'm a complete stranger they will likely never see again.
I think it's anything but polite since it's completely contrived
and forced.
My first name is not what people call me and my last name is
hard to pronounce, so it's never going to make me feel good to
have someone call me by either one when we were never
introduced.
It's very different if I am involved in a transaction where they
ask my name and then subsequently use it. This happened at Lowes
yesterday and the guy even added an extra vowel to my name and
called me by my first legal name, but I didn't mind a bit,
because he was sincere and really helpful.
I do not like the overly familiar form of customer service
unless it's natural and honest. If it's company dictated and
forced, it's just annoying.
[/quote]
I don't see using my last name as being familiar at all. Most
cashiers can either see my name when I put in a frequent shopper
number or scan my credit card. To me is is no different than
calling a service center and the rep using my last name through
the rest of the transaction.
Does it bother you if you call into your credit card company to
ask a question and the person on the phone (who you can't even
see and will most likely never encounter again) uses your last
name through out the rest of the interaction?
I think I'm just old. I remember going shopping as a child and
clerks asking for my mother's name if they didn't recognize her.
[/quote]
It doesn’t bother me when they have asked my name and call me by
my last name after that. Like a polite “Thank you Ms. Jensen De
Fitzee” when handing back my card.
It’s irritating when they have to handle my card but have no
reason to look at the name at all, but start using my name.
When this happens I usually find it off because
a) store policy dictates it
b)they think it’s smart/cute
c) or they try to pronounce my name then ask if that’s right
when it’s not necessary in the first place.
If I could have paid cash and not had them even know my name
it’s likely to irritate me unless they are are just truly
sincere and polite.
I don’t mind them using my name in these scenarios:
-During an extended transaction where they either ask my name or
have reason to know it
-When I have a contract with the company
-Places I frequent where they learn my name and remember me
whenever I return
These are also situations where it feels normal to make small
talk.
Otherwise, it’s just an annoyance. But I guess I sound like a
curmudgeon!
#Post#: 42260--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: gramma dishes Date: November 18, 2019, 7:09 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=JeanFromBNA link=topic=1408.msg42237#msg42237
date=1574106031]
... Having bank personnel asking about your weekend as a way of
greeting is just strange. I've never had it happen. ...
[/quote]
Did anyone happen to see that news article yesterday about this
elderly couple who made a substantial withdrawal from their bank
and later that day the teller came by, beat them up and stole
their cash? (He was caught, fortunately.)
But having read that I think I'd freeze if a bank employee
basically inquired as to whether or not I was planning to be
home over the weekend! :-\
#Post#: 42270--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: NFPwife Date: November 18, 2019, 11:06 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=gramma dishes link=topic=1408.msg42260#msg42260
date=1574125762]
[quote author=JeanFromBNA link=topic=1408.msg42237#msg42237
date=1574106031]
... Having bank personnel asking about your weekend as a way of
greeting is just strange. I've never had it happen. ...
[/quote]
Did anyone happen to see that news article yesterday about this
elderly couple who made a substantial withdrawal from their bank
and later that day the teller came by, beat them up and stole
their cash? (He was caught, fortunately.)
But having read that I think I'd freeze if a bank employee
basically inquired as to whether or not I was planning to be
home over the weekend! :-\
[/quote]
That's a great point! If I ever take out a large sum, I'm
mentioning that I'm using some of it for a dog bed and toys for
my newly rescued, gigantic dog.
I don't mind being called by last name, gate agents, flight
attendants, and hotel front desk staff do it all the time. When
I come back to a hotel in the evening, I'll get a "Welcome back,
Mrs. Fan."
I hate, hate, hate being asked about my groceries. DH does a big
shop at a store and buys a couple cases of an item. The cashier
used to consistently ask what we were doing with it, I generally
deadpanned, "Eating it." Then the cashier wants to know if we
live far, blah, blah. I tweeted the company about it, and they
stopped. If I hated it, I'm sure others were giving them
feedback, too. (Once my husband was asked if we were having a
party. Another time if he ran a restaurant. Thankfully, I wasn't
with him those times.)
I happened upon a transaction, though, where I thought the clerk
probably should have asked a few questions - a middle aged man
was in the small drugstore in our town and was asking how and
where he could buy bitcoin. The cashier was trying to help him
to figure out where to buy bitcoin and I inserted myself because
it seemed like the guy was getting scammed. I said something
like, "Your computer isn't locked down and you're buying bitcoin
to get it unlocked are you?" He said, "No." I said, "Oh, because
bitcoin is most often used for scams or purchases on the
darkweb," and kept walking out of the store. (I know some
companies are trying to legitimize it, but I think it's use
still raises flags.) I could hear him ask the cashier, "Really?"
and she said yes. Hopefully, that gave him pause.
#Post#: 42272--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: LurkingGurl Date: November 18, 2019, 11:14 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
I think there's friendly and then there's overly familiar.
Unless one has repeated contacts with a particular service
person and has opened the door to a more social interaction,
it's better to keep it all business.
It's creepy reading someone name off their credit card. I have
a hard to pronounce last name. When cashier's have tried the
"Thank-you Ms Hard... Ms HardToPro... PronounceLastName"
It's like some form of unfortunate performance art wherein some
poor high school kid with his first job muddles his way through
pronouncing what seems to him like a random cluster of vowels.
"Thanks--have a nice evening" is so very sufficient that nothing
else is needed.
As far as using my first name? Nope. Don't do that unless we
have been transacting business more than just me checking out of
the grocery store.
In cases where customers obviously want more of a personal
connection, I don't see anything wrong with a service person
responding to that. But, otherwise, just being cheerful and
doing one's job competently is great.
#Post#: 42273--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: LurkingGurl Date: November 18, 2019, 11:18 pm
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=PVZFan link=topic=1408.msg42270#msg42270
date=1574139994]
I happened upon a transaction, though, where I thought the clerk
probably should have asked a few questions - a middle aged man
was in the small drugstore in our town and was asking how and
where he could buy bitcoin. The cashier was trying to help him
to figure out where to buy bitcoin and I inserted myself because
it seemed like the guy was getting scammed. I said something
like, "Your computer isn't locked down and you're buying bitcoin
to get it unlocked are you?" He said, "No." I said, "Oh, because
bitcoin is most often used for scams or purchases on the
darkweb," and kept walking out of the store. (I know some
companies are trying to legitimize it, but I think it's use
still raises flags.) I could hear him ask the cashier, "Really?"
and she said yes. Hopefully, that gave him pause.
[/quote]
I would think it was weird for someone to be asking about it in
a store. But in general, it's not something that is only used
on the dark web. For many people it's a perfectly legitimate
currency.
#Post#: 42274--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: lakey Date: November 19, 2019, 12:17 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote]Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
« Reply #23 on: Today at 11:14:47 pm »
Quote
I think there's friendly and then there's overly familiar.
Unless one has repeated contacts with a particular service
person and has opened the door to a more social interaction,
it's better to keep it all business.
It's creepy reading someone name off their credit card. I have
a hard to pronounce last name. When cashier's have tried the
"Thank-you Ms Hard... Ms HardToPro... PronounceLastName"
It's like some form of unfortunate performance art wherein some
poor high school kid with his first job muddles his way through
pronouncing what seems to him like a random cluster of vowels.
"Thanks--have a nice evening" is so very sufficient that nothing
else is needed.
As far as using my first name? Nope. Don't do that unless we
have been transacting business more than just me checking out of
the grocery store.
In cases where customers obviously want more of a personal
connection, I don't see anything wrong with a service person
responding to that. But, otherwise, just being cheerful and
doing one's job competently is great.[/quote]
I agree with this. I would consider a person asking me about my
plans to be overly familiar, unless it's someone I see on a
regular basis and have gotten to know. I haven't seen it as much
lately, but a few years ago it seemed that a lot of restaurant
servers were annoyingly over friendly. I actually had a couple
of them plop themselves down across from me in the booth to
take my order. "How are you?" and "How's your day going?" are
pretty much polite formalities and don't bother me. Of course
there's always the risk that the customer has had a crummy day
and starts talking about it.
As far as the over familiarity goes, along with questions about
plans, I think it is okay if the service person knows that the
customer would welcome it. I'm saying this because I see a lot
of elderly people who appear to want to chat. A perceptive
cashier or restaurant server may be able to pick up on the 80
year old who likes engaging while they are out and about. My
late father was definitely like this.
#Post#: 42275--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: malfoyfan13 Date: November 19, 2019, 12:23 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I've been complaining about this topic for years. One of the
grocery stores we go to has apparently told employees they must
greet every customer they encounter, no matter what they're
doing, so every person in the store says "Hi! how ya doing?"
...so sometimes I'll get that from 10 different people while I'm
shopping. If it were sincere it might be endearing, but it's
not sincere. It's corporate BS. I'd honestly rather be left
alone to shop.
As for the "what are your plans for the weekend?" We get that
one a lot. Pretty much every Sunday we're at a local chain
grocery store and whichever clerk checks us out asks it. I find
it weird but it's so common I've got used to it. I've had it
asked at my bank too. And the coffee place.
The worst example of this type of thing I can think of right now
- we were at a new sandwich place. Its theme is fire house. I
swear at least 6 people came over to the table while we were
eating and asked us at length how we liked the sandwiches and
the place. It was really strange. We never went there again.
I said at least at (other sandwich place) we can eat in peace.
Sheesh. I wonder how many other potential repeat customers were
lost in this way. And I hope once they had been open a while
they settled down and let the customers alone.
I don't like it when employees try to use my name because they
ALWAYS mispronounce it and I have to correct them. Or they use
my first name, which is overly familiar.
Sometimes I wonder what is in the heads of corporations. Do
they really think if we're constantly greeted we'll spend more
money? Do they really think a false friendliness creates some
kind of bond? I shop or eat at places based on price and
availability of goods or because I like the food. Not because
someone's trying to pretend he's my new best friend.
When I go to a place often and the employees get to know me,
that's different. And I don't mind a bit of small talk about
the weather. I just dislike the phoniness. And I bet the
employees don't like it either.
#Post#: 42283--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: cymbaline246 Date: November 19, 2019, 7:15 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I live in the US.
The branch manager of the bank wished me a nice weekend. We've
met exactly twice: Friday, when he notarized a paper for me, and
once before, when he issued me a new debit card to replace the
one I deactivated by punching the wrong PIN three times in a
row.
#Post#: 42285--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: Hmmm Date: November 19, 2019, 8:15 am
---------------------------------------------------------
[quote author=Hanna link=topic=1408.msg42257#msg42257
date=1574123707]
[quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1408.msg42219#msg42219
date=1574099497]
[quote author=Hanna link=topic=1408.msg42214#msg42214
date=1574097830]
[quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1408.msg42211#msg42211
date=1574097200]
[quote author=Despedina link=topic=1408.msg42210#msg42210
date=1574096046]
snip for length
[/quote]
It doesn’t bother me when they have asked my name and call me by
my last name after that. Like a polite “Thank you Ms. Jensen De
Fitzee” when handing back my card.
It’s irritating when they have to handle my card but have no
reason to look at the name at all, but start using my name.
When this happens I usually find it off because
a) store policy dictates it
b)they think it’s smart/cute
c) or they try to pronounce my name then ask if that’s right
when it’s not necessary in the first place.
If I could have paid cash and not had them even know my name
it’s likely to irritate me unless they are are just truly
sincere and polite.
I don’t mind them using my name in these scenarios:
-During an extended transaction where they either ask my name or
have reason to know it
-When I have a contract with the company
-Places I frequent where they learn my name and remember me
whenever I return
These are also situations where it feels normal to make small
talk.
Otherwise, it’s just an annoyance. But I guess I sound like a
curmudgeon!
[/quote]
Having worked retail, I still remember the days when it was the
clerks responsibility to look at the credit card to very at
least expiration date and sort of figure out if it was the
persons card and ask for ID if they don't think the guy handing
them the card is named Betty Lou. Looking at the name is just
part of the transaction.
I also don't have issue with a store instituting a policy that
requires their employees to treat customers as individual humans
and not faceless entities passing through their day.
#Post#: 42288--------------------------------------------------
Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
By: peony Date: November 19, 2019, 8:45 am
---------------------------------------------------------
I've been greeted ten times by employees as I am wandering the
aisles of a store, and I've been asked what my plans were for
the weekend by cashiers who I have never met before. I don't
like anything more than "Hello, may I help you," "Good
morning/afternoon/evening," "Did you find everything you were
looking for?" and "Thank you, have a nice day." I am focused on
my errands and I dislike having to switch mental gears and make
small talk while I'm intent on other things. In my opinion it's
business courteous and I don't mind if it's impersonal or
canned. They are doing their job, I am going about my business,
it's all good.
*****************************************************
DIR Previous Page
DIR Next Page