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       #Post#: 42187--------------------------------------------------
       How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Aleko Date: November 18, 2019, 8:30 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Here in the UK, customer-service people aren’t routinely
       compelled by their management to be "friendly" to customers; all
       they are required to be is civil and helpful. They say things
       like 'Good morning', 'Do you need any help?' and 'Are you OK
       packing that yourself?' They aren't obliged to say stuff like
       ‘How are you today?’ and ‘Have a great day!’ to total strangers.
       (Although they quite typically do ask ‘How are you today?’ to
       customers they know, and it's the fact that they don't say it to
       everyone that makes that agreeable; it means 'I recognise you'.)
       I was aware that US companies typically require their
       customer-facing staff to say stuff like ‘How are you today?’ and
       ‘Have a great day!’ to all customers. But just today I learned
       from a language board I frequent that another member had walked
       into a bank in the USA - he had never been there before - and a
       customer service person walked up to him and asked: 'How's it
       going? What are your plans for the weekend?'  He was gobsmacked,
       and so was I when I read about it: in what imaginable universe
       is that an appropriate thing to say to a total stranger?
       So I came here to ask the Americans on this board: is this
       normal nowadays in the USA? And does anybody actually like it?
       #Post#: 42188--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: kckgirl Date: November 18, 2019, 8:32 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I have lived in the USA all my life and have never been greeted
       like that.
       #Post#: 42189--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Jem Date: November 18, 2019, 8:34 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       There are some places that apparently must instruct employees to
       be over-friendly. I personally don't like it at all. Polite,
       yes. Overly chatty, no thank you. It makes me feel like I need
       to put on a performance.
       #Post#: 42191--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Hmmm Date: November 18, 2019, 8:47 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       The bank example seems to be poorly delivered by the employee. I
       would be very confused to walk into anywhere and the first thing
       to be asked were my plans for the weekend. I'd wonder if they
       were trying to sale me tickets to some upcoming event.  But yes,
       I have been asked by sales clerks if I had plans for the weekend
       while completing a sale or even by a bank teller as part of my
       transaction. Yesterday, the cashier at the grocery asked if we
       were getting ready for Thanksgiving. But none of these ever
       occur at the very beginning of the interaction.
       Not sure when asking about plans for the weekend or other
       questions became as common as commenting on the weather, but
       yes, to me it is that level of banter. I know the clerk doesn't
       really care how I am doing when asking "how are you today" and I
       know they don't really care if I plan to watch the big sports
       game. It's just harmless chatter that gives the impression of
       "we care about you as a customer".
       But often this chatter between client and customer service isn't
       corporate compelled. It is just the social norm we all operate
       in these days in the US. At sometime around the late 70's based
       on my experience the idea of the customer being addressed as Mr
       or Ms while the clerk was referred to by first name went away
       and there was a push that we were all equal and therefore would
       interact with each other on a more casual basis. So, yes me and
       the cashier might exchange how we prefer to cook our mashed
       potatoes and I might ask the high school age sacker if he is
       ready for an extended break.
       The thing I really dislike is the yell out when entering a fast
       casual restaurant of "welcome to XXX" from have the employees. i
       also don't want my waiter/waitress asking more than one or two
       non-service related items.
       #Post#: 42196--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: lowspark Date: November 18, 2019, 9:04 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Jem link=topic=1408.msg42189#msg42189
       date=1574087666]
       There are some places that apparently must instruct employees to
       be over-friendly. I personally don't like it at all. Polite,
       yes. Overly chatty, no thank you. It makes me feel like I need
       to put on a performance.
       [/quote]
       Agree. Not all places do it but yeah, some do. It's fine and
       even desirable that I get a smile and very short greeting like,
       "How can I help you" or similar. Asking about my day or anything
       else personal is annoying at best and intrusive at worst.
       I'm here to conduct business. I want to get that business done
       and leave and get on with my day. If I want to have a fun
       conversation about my weekend, it's going to be with my friends
       and family not with the grocery checker, the bank clerk, etc.
       At the end of the transaction, "have a nice day" or some such is
       pretty standard, but at least it doesn't hinder my progress.
       It's all rather meaningless of course, but it's become so
       ubiquitous I guess it's expected now, and if they didn't say it,
       people might be offended! LOL  :D
       #Post#: 42198--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: November 18, 2019, 9:19 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Walking in the door at the bank and being asked about my
       weekend... strange.
       Being asked about my weekend during the banter of making a
       deposit... normal.
       I don't know if it's normal society or if the corporation is
       encouraging it, but many employees will chat a bit. Questions
       like "do you have big plans for the weekend?" are really saying,
       "tell me what we can chat about it?" If I do have plans that I
       am comfortable discussing, then I will take the bait. If I don't
       want to discuss my plans, I will typically say something like,
       "Not really, but I hear the weather is going to be beautiful." I
       am probably a chattier customer than most, so I often find
       myself steering conversations myself rather than the employee.
       The bank that I use is a large branch. There is a customer
       service station by the door where a few employees greet you. I
       am guessing that they are there to help redirect customers who
       don't need to do a transaction with a teller, but rather have an
       appointment (or need to speak with) a different sort of agent.
       Despite my chattiness, I rather dislike when these
       representatives get too talkative. I am fine with a greeting,
       but I am almost always on my way to the teller and just want to
       get in line and not be held up with unnecessary talk. Being
       stopped to discuss my weekend would annoy me more than usual!
       #Post#: 42201--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: sandisadie Date: November 18, 2019, 9:29 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I'm also one who doesn't want to have to think of an answer when
       I'm actually bent on taking care of business.  "have a nice day"
       or "how are you?" are ok and I usually say something like that
       when I interact with an employee.  To me, those things are
       similar to saying "hello" and "thank you".  Especially annoying
       is when I'm conducting business on the phone and right away the
       person on the call will attempt to chat with me instead of
       listening to why I'm calling.
       #Post#: 42210--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Despedina Date: November 18, 2019, 10:54 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I worked at a grocery store where we were told to use the
       customer's name if we could see it on a credit card or check. I
       hated doing it. I didn't know these people and many had uncommon
       german and french last names that were not easy to pronounce.
       In those cases we were told to ask how to pronounce their name
       then say "Have a nice day Mr. Whatsyername".  I had 2 customers
       that told me it was unnecessary and strange for me to address
       them by name as we didn't know each other. One lady seemed very
       offended. I never used personal names after that.
       #Post#: 42211--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Hmmm Date: November 18, 2019, 11:13 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Despedina link=topic=1408.msg42210#msg42210
       date=1574096046]
       I worked at a grocery store where we were told to use the
       customer's name if we could see it on a credit card or check. I
       hated doing it. I didn't know these people and many had uncommon
       german and french last names that were not easy to pronounce.
       In those cases we were told to ask how to pronounce their name
       then say "Have a nice day Mr. Whatsyername".  I had 2 customers
       that told me it was unnecessary and strange for me to address
       them by name as we didn't know each other. One lady seemed very
       offended. I never used personal names after that.
       [/quote]
       This makes me a little sad. Other customers either didn't mind
       it or liked being addressed by name. But because 2 complained,
       all the others lost this little bit of humanity.
       #Post#: 42214--------------------------------------------------
       Re: How "friendly" do we want service people to be?
       By: Hanna Date: November 18, 2019, 11:23 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=Hmmm link=topic=1408.msg42211#msg42211
       date=1574097200]
       [quote author=Despedina link=topic=1408.msg42210#msg42210
       date=1574096046]
       I worked at a grocery store where we were told to use the
       customer's name if we could see it on a credit card or check. I
       hated doing it. I didn't know these people and many had uncommon
       german and french last names that were not easy to pronounce.
       In those cases we were told to ask how to pronounce their name
       then say "Have a nice day Mr. Whatsyername".  I had 2 customers
       that told me it was unnecessary and strange for me to address
       them by name as we didn't know each other. One lady seemed very
       offended. I never used personal names after that.
       [/quote]
       This makes me a little sad. Other customers either didn't mind
       it or liked being addressed by name. But because 2 complained,
       all the others lost this little bit of humanity.
       [/quote]
       I strongly dislike it when someone reads my name from my debit
       card or check and uses it to pretend we are on familiar terms
       when I'm a complete stranger they will likely never see again.
       I think it's anything but polite since it's completely contrived
       and forced.
       My first name is not what people call me and my last name is
       hard to pronounce, so it's never going to make me feel good to
       have someone call me by either one when we were never
       introduced.
       It's very different if I am involved in a transaction where they
       ask my name and then subsequently use it. This happened at Lowes
       yesterday and the guy even added an extra vowel to my name and
       called me by my first legal name, but I didn't mind a bit,
       because he was sincere and really helpful.
       I do not like the overly familiar form of customer service
       unless it's natural and honest.  If it's company dictated and
       forced, it's just annoying.
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