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       #Post#: 40879--------------------------------------------------
       I'm miffed.
       By: jpcher Date: October 22, 2019, 4:29 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I really don't think there's anything I can do about this but it
       bothers me.
       There's a relatively new admin (4-5ish months) that works for a
       new Director (8 months or more).
       When I first met Director she said "Oh, I've heard about you.
       You are legend." Which I thought was a rather nice compliment.
       Trust me, it's not because of the compliment, but because she's
       a Director (big-wig) and Director's projects usually get bumped
       up on my schedule.
       A couple of weeks ago Admin asked me for a quick turn on a
       project and I told her that deadline was pretty tight and asked
       if there was some wiggle room. She said "Absolutely!" and gave
       me an extra week to complete the project . . . red flag. Okay,
       her quick turn deadlines aren't necessarily rush jobs. Got it.
       I was out of office yesterday. I did not have an OOO message on
       my voice mail, but I did on my email (my usual form of
       communication).
       Today, when I went in, there was a "Missed Call" on my email,
       but no message. Immediately after that there was an email from
       the same person (SP) who works with Admin asking me a question
       that I did not know the answer to. So I asked my "Little Miss
       Know-it-All" (LOVE this woman!) if she knew who the question
       should be directed to. And, as usual ;), it should have been
       directed to her, not me. So I forwarded the message to LMKIA.
       LMKIA said "Ugh! I know . . . blah, blah, blah, I received an
       email from Admin concerning the question. I haven't responded
       yet, but I will."
       Less than two hours later LMKIA responded and copied me on her
       email chain. Apparently SP got Admin involved, and this was not
       something that needed an immediate reply.
       I read through the email chain and . . . this is what I'm miffed
       about . . . Admin's opening email to LMKIA started with "After
       getting the run-around from jpcher and (other person) I thought
       maybe you might know the answer . . ."
       After getting the run-around?! What run-around? I was OOO for
       one day!
       Admin copied Director.
       Sigh.
       Any thoughts?
       #Post#: 40882--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: TootsNYC Date: October 22, 2019, 4:52 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       When someone makes me look bad in front of a big cheese in some
       way, I don't let it stand.
       And I deal with it in person
       I'd walk over and in a very nice manner, say, "I saw your email
       with the question--since it wasn't really a question for me, I
       proactively forwarded it to Little Miss Know-It All, so I did
       get your answer for you. Glad to help.
       "But I wanted to point something out. You used the term "got
       the run-around," and said you "got the runaround" from me,
       specifically. You used my name.
       "That term is inaccurate, and it makes me look particularly
       bad in front of the director. I didn't give you the runaround--I
       was out of the office for a day, and there was no message that I
       could have accessed from home. I had to wait for the next day to
       respond.
       "That's not a runaround. And in fact, I went above and
       beyond to make sure the answer got to you, which I didn't
       necessarily have to do.
       "Please be careful of the wording you use when you talk
       about your colleagues. If I've genuinely dropped the ball, I'm
       happy to hear about it from you. But I didn't appreciate you
       making me look obstructive and uncooperative when I absolutely
       was not.
       "We don't need to have a big dialogue, and I'm not going to
       loop someone else in to complain. I'm just letting you know that
       this was problematic wording."
       In short, "You made me look bad with your word choice, and it
       was inaccurate. So I don't appreciate it. Don't do that again. I
       promise--I would never do it to you."
       #Post#: 40891--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: browzer11 Date: October 22, 2019, 11:19 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Be very careful when you chastise a superior. No boss likes to
       be talked down to.
       Your response Toots, (which looks like something you might say
       to a child), could get you fired or blacklisted.
       #Post#: 40898--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: DebraDoda Date: October 23, 2019, 6:09 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I didn't get the impression that Admin is jpcher's superior;
       either her peer or subordinate.  Jpcher, can you clarify?
       #Post#: 40904--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: Jem Date: October 23, 2019, 9:17 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=mrs_deb link=topic=1378.msg40898#msg40898
       date=1571828993]
       I didn't get the impression that Admin is jpcher's superior;
       either her peer or subordinate.  Jpcher, can you clarify?
       [/quote]
       Regardless, I still agree with browzer11. NO ONE likes to be
       talked down to. It seems like the admin sent the email that
       offended jpcher to LMKIA, and presumably LMKIA knows what
       actually happened. I would think the director would not be
       micro-analyzing emails s/he is cced on, and wouldn't want to be
       involved in a tiff between employees of this nature. Presumably
       the SP got jpcher's OOO email so it's not like SP didn't know
       she was OOO. I get that jpcher is irked by the wording (I would
       be too) but I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. Much like a
       "recalled email" (which never works) I think it would only
       highlight the admin's phrasing and make all of you look bad and
       petty.
       In the future, I would be certain to have the OOO on both the
       phone and email.
       #Post#: 40905--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: lowspark Date: October 23, 2019, 9:24 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       Regardless of whether Admin is jpcher's superior, she is,
       apparently, her customer. And as such, I don't think it's ever a
       good idea to chastise a customer. However, it might be a good
       idea for jpcher to respond in such a way as to defend herself
       without being snarky or disrespectful.
       Dear Admin,
       I'm so sorry that you felt I was giving you the runaround on
       this issue. That was not my intent, but rather, I wanted to
       direct you to the person who could be most helpful. LMKIA has
       much better knowledge on this topic than I do, and so is better
       suited to answer this question for you.
       Please feel free to call on me at any time. I am happy to answer
       questions as I can, or to help you determine who might better
       help you if I can't.
       Love,
       jpcher
       (haha, you can leave out the "love" part)
       Anyway, this clarifies your part in the conversation and why you
       forwarded the email, and hopefully goes toward mollifying Admin,
       but it also gives Director a bit of explanation. Best response
       makes you look good without making others look bad.
       #Post#: 40907--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: DaDancingPsych Date: October 23, 2019, 10:16 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I think that this is a case of tone is everything! I would not
       approach Admin yelling and screaming and ranting. I would not
       say it with a condescending or "how dare you" attitude. But I
       think it wise to take along the lines of "You might not have
       realized that your wording said" fashion. Without further
       background information, I would assume the best of Admin. Maybe
       it was a poor choice in words. Maybe it was a rather rotten day.
       Either way, I do think that it's worth saying something.
       #Post#: 40944--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: jpcher Date: October 23, 2019, 6:22 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=mrs_deb link=topic=1378.msg40898#msg40898
       date=1571828993]
       I didn't get the impression that Admin is jpcher's superior;
       either her peer or subordinate.  Jpcher, can you clarify?
       [/quote]
       Admin is in no way my superior, she's a customer just like many
       other admins of directors that I do work for.
       Directors (admin's) requests for projects go to the top of the
       line because it eventually goes to CEO's perusal and approval.
       I don't know Admin well enough that I could approach her in
       person (don't even know where she sits). I've only met her once,
       when she first started, all other conversations have been
       through email, and I'm a bit uncomfortable with putting some of
       the things posters have suggested in writing. KWIM?
       However, I tend to agree that something should be said. I like a
       lot of your responses. Just not sure how to approach.
       QueenFaninCA -- you've disagreed with several posts here. I'd
       like to hear your thoughts as to how you would deal with this
       situation. Honestly curious.
       #Post#: 40958--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: NyaChan Date: October 23, 2019, 11:54 pm
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       I really don’t think the director read down that far and even if
       they did, your track record should help mitigate the negative
       wording used.  I would try mentioning in person “Admin, I
       noticed in the email chain from X question that you felt you
       were given the run-around when trying to get an answer.  I
       wanted to make sure you knew that I take all queries and
       requests seriously and wanted to discuss what may have caused
       you to think that.  I sent the request to the correct person as
       soon as i was back in the office and figured out where it should
       go - is there a different way you expected me to handle it?”
       #Post#: 40969--------------------------------------------------
       Re: I'm miffed.
       By: Jem Date: October 24, 2019, 8:04 am
       ---------------------------------------------------------
       [quote author=NyaChan link=topic=1378.msg40958#msg40958
       date=1571892849]
       I really don’t think the director read down that far and even if
       they did, your track record should help mitigate the negative
       wording used.  I would try mentioning in person “Admin, I
       noticed in the email chain from X question that you felt you
       were given the run-around when trying to get an answer.  I
       wanted to make sure you knew that I take all queries and
       requests seriously and wanted to discuss what may have caused
       you to think that.  I sent the request to the correct person as
       soon as i was back in the office and figured out where it should
       go - is there a different way you expected me to handle it?”
       [/quote]
       I think this is good. One thing I meant to say earlier and did
       not was that if it were me I would have forwarded the request to
       the correct person with a cc to the admin so everyone is on the
       same page. "Admin, I have cced you on my email to LMKIA. She
       will be able to answer the questions. LMKIA, see the questions
       below and provide answers directly to admin. Thank you!"
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