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#Post#: 40701--------------------------------------------------
Family baby shower
By: jazzgirl205 Date: October 19, 2019, 6:06 am
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My daughter is 21, pregnant and single. I know that it is poor
form for a mother to throw her daughter a shower. Would it be
excusable if only family were invited (aunts and cousins)? Dh
and I live in a different state but dd and the rest of the
family are in the same area. They check on her and are generally
there for her. Around her due date, we'll be driving down and
spending at least 4 months helping out.
#Post#: 40706--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: jpcher Date: October 19, 2019, 7:57 am
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I say give your daughter the best baby shower ever! Include
relatives, friends, coworkers, helpmates, etc.
Sometimes old rules of etiquette can be ignored.
However if you want to stick to etiquette rules maybe talk to
one of the aunts or cousins about officially hosting a shower.
You could let them know that you are willing to pay, do all the
work involved, and stand back in the shadows while the 'hostess'
receives the kudos. ::)
I don't really like my above paragraph, but I hope you get my
intent . . . get other people involved.
My niece had a baby shower at her mom's home. It wasn't clear
who the actual host was because Mom did the food, friend#1 did
the games, friend#2 handed the gifts to niece, friend#3 wrote a
list of what gift was given from whom . . . in other words it
was a well hosted shower by many that loved niece, including
Mom.
#Post#: 40714--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: TootsNYC Date: October 19, 2019, 10:34 am
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I think family/only showers are fine if hosted by grandma-to-be.
And a great many other people don’t really care.
I agree, if you’re nervous, ask a good friend of hers or a
cousin to join you.
#Post#: 40720--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: DaDancingPsych Date: October 19, 2019, 2:43 pm
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When my sister found out that her oldest son was pregnant (well,
his girlfriend), she was uneasy with the news. It was an
unexpected pregnancy and the timing was less than ideal, but
sometimes that's how life rolls. When she announced that she
would be throwing the baby shower, I immediately thought of what
etiquette would say, but later decided to disregard the "no
grandmas throwing the shower" rule. She loves planning parties
and this gave her a way to get excited about the news and it was
only immediate family that was invited. I share all of this to
say, go for it! I think when it comes to family, sometimes the
etiquette rules get blurred (or even blown up) and as long as
everyone is happy, what is the harm?
#Post#: 40722--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: oogyda Date: October 19, 2019, 3:26 pm
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You don't have to call it a shower.
#Post#: 40723--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: chigger Date: October 19, 2019, 3:29 pm
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I think you are okay as long as you keep it to family and close
friends. Although, I think very few people follow that etiquette
rule anymore.
#Post#: 40737--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: Lula Date: October 19, 2019, 7:36 pm
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I don't think I've ever attended a baby shower that wasn't
hosted by the grandma-to-be.
#Post#: 40738--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: Dazi Date: October 19, 2019, 7:51 pm
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I've never heard of this "rule" before in my entire life. Baby
showers have always been hosted by the soon to be grandma, the
sister of the mom to be, or a close friend in my experience. Any
of those people are perfectly appropriate to host a baby shower.
#Post#: 40740--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: Tea Drinker Date: October 19, 2019, 8:26 pm
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Even Miss Manners would approve of a family-only shower thrown
by a relative of the mother-to-be.
As I understand it, the reason some (older?) etiquette objects
to relatives hosting a baby shower an inviting non-family guests
is the idea that the pregnant woman's family should be the ones
helping her by buying things she/the baby needs. From that
angle, it can come across as "please buy things for my
daughter/sister/niece so the family doesn't have to spend as
much money."
A shower is unusual because it's a party for adults where the
main point is "please buy things for the guest of honor," and
it's socially acceptable for opening presents to be the main
entertainment.
I think it also makes a difference what sort of gifts people are
bringing, or being asked for: friends buying you colorful
onesies is different from asking your friends to pay for an
expensive stroller.
#Post#: 40742--------------------------------------------------
Re: Family baby shower
By: pierrotlunaire0 Date: October 19, 2019, 9:22 pm
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I completely agree with Tea Drinker. If it is a family only
party, it can be hosted by a grandmother, no question.
But, even if there are more than just family invited, I don't
think anyone would have a problem as long as it was not a big
extravaganza with a push for expensive gifts.
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