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       #Post#: 39484--------------------------------------------------
       Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: SioCat Date: September 29, 2019, 11:53 am
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       This summer, my brother had a beautiful wedding in Alaska. We
       had an amazing family vacation and the weather was beautiful. My
       family was on their best behavior and we actually hit it off
       really well with the brides family. It was an outdoor wedding
       and everything was beautiful.
       My mother normally doesn’t care at all what people think of her,
       so on that day, she dressed herself and did her own makeup and
       hair. She didn’t feel the need to wear spanx or a bodysuit
       because everything looked pretty good while she was standing in
       front of the mirror.
       The problem is... as soon as the pictures started going on
       Facebook, she realized that you can see every curve and lump
       underneath the dress. She looks beautiful until you get to her
       midsection. She’s not a big woman, but she does have a little
       belly and you can see panty lines and all that.
       My mother and I are very close, so we talk frequently and
       openly. She has confided in me that she hates the photos. All of
       them. She wishes she had worn a bodysuit underneath. She wishes
       she had tucked in her tummy more. The pictures  make her feel
       terrible about herself. The mother of the bride is a similar
       build and didn’t have any of the same issues because she wore
       something underneath.
       I want to display these pictures proudly and I want her to do
       the same. We don’t have many photos with the entire family and
       we’re never ever dressed up. So, I’m wondering how terrible it
       would be to have these pictures photoshopped. I see it as a
       kindness to my mother, but maybe some might think it’s rude?
       Anyways, I thought it would be interesting to get other people’s
       opinions. What do y’all think?
       #Post#: 39485--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: Miss Cathy Date: September 29, 2019, 12:19 pm
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       Easy fix! Since you talk to your mum openly, just say "I know
       you weren't happy with the photos, but I was thinking after we
       spoke, it wouldn't be that hard to photoshop them, and just
       remove some of those panty lines that show through in the
       shots." You're not changing what your mum looks like entirely,
       you're just making her look like she could have looked if she'd
       worn better undergarments.
       #Post#: 39486--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: Luci Date: September 29, 2019, 12:44 pm
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       Your mom already knows she could better, so I think she will be
       pleased. Do it.
       #Post#: 39490--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: NyaChan Date: September 29, 2019, 1:00 pm
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       I think Miss Cathy has a great way to suggest it.  I think the
       key thing here is that the photoshopping isn’t being done to
       change what she actually looks like, it is just helping with a
       wardrobe issue that wasn’t apparent on the day of and could have
       otherwise been fixed.  Rude would be if she hadn’t said a word
       and you suggested out of nowhere that you photoshop a couple of
       dress sizes off the pictures.
       #Post#: 39491--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: gramma dishes Date: September 29, 2019, 1:20 pm
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       If you have the skills to do it I think it would be a wonderful
       gift to your Mom.   I don't think she'd have mentioned how
       unhappy she was with her looks if she hadn't hoped there was a
       "fix".  Well, you have the fix!
       #Post#: 39502--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: Gellchom Date: September 29, 2019, 6:25 pm
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       “Maybe some might think it’s rude”
       Rude?  To whom?  Not at all.
       It’s not like you are planning on asking everyone to photoshop
       their copies of the photos, or asking the photographer to do it
       before distributing them.  Just your and Mom’s prints, right?
       Do whatever you please!
       #Post#: 39503--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: sandisadie Date: September 29, 2019, 6:31 pm
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       I agree with doing a little photo fixing because the Mother
       brought up the subject of her appearance.  Last year when my
       daughter and I took a trip to Ireland for my birthday she took
       some photos of me in different settings and later decided to use
       one of them to make a portrait to have framed and included on
       her family photo wall going up the stairs.  I set with her while
       she changed the lighting and shadows, etc to make the overall
       picture of me more appealing.  It didn't change what I looked
       like but was a better presentation of the setting.  I love it.
       I'll bet this Mother will love these photos that include her
       also.
       #Post#: 39508--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: Hanna Date: September 29, 2019, 9:00 pm
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       The photographer for my wedding did this and I don’t think it’s
       rude.
       #Post#: 39511--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: Star Wars Fan Date: September 30, 2019, 12:32 am
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       I'd say if you want to it's fine only as long as your mother's
       fine with it too. If she's not then I don't think you should
       photoshop the pictures.
       Ed.
       #Post#: 39545--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Photoshopping wedding photos
       By: TootsNYC Date: September 30, 2019, 12:15 pm
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       [quote author=NyaChan link=topic=1351.msg39490#msg39490
       date=1569780002]
       I think Miss Cathy has a great way to suggest it.  I think the
       key thing here is that the photoshopping isn’t being done to
       change what she actually looks like, it is just helping with a
       wardrobe issue that wasn’t apparent on the day of and could have
       otherwise been fixed.  Rude would be if she hadn’t said a word
       and you suggested out of nowhere that you photoshop a couple of
       dress sizes off the pictures.
       [/quote]
       Similar to if a lock of hair had blow down across her face. Or a
       button had come undone.
       I'm a copyeditor, and I often work on text in which we quote
       people--celebrities, politicians, doctors, lots of types of
       people.
       We always have the transcript and the recording, and we start
       with the verbatim wording.
       But I am a huge proponent of the idea that if their grammar was
       wonky (and it doesn't seem to be a deliberate choice for fun or
       shading), and their clause is in the wrong place, that we SHOULD
       edit their words in the least intrusive way that still makes
       them look good.
       Because when people talk, they don't focus on that. We all start
       a sentence with one subject and change in the middle to a
       different one. And everybody understands what we meant, and
       forgives us, and later probably doesn't even remember.
       But we are freezing their words and putting them on ink, out in
       front of people. We owe it to them to not let them look bad in
       that place.
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