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       #Post#: 37398--------------------------------------------------
       Um... hi?
       By: shadowfox79 Date: August 24, 2019, 2:30 pm
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       Not sure quite how to deal with this one.
       DH and I recently moved into a new build property. Since it was
       a new build we spent a lot of time dealing with the agent,
       "Lisa", getting updates and having meetings on what fixings and
       so forth we wanted. As we're now in we haven't needed to do that
       any more but have had to pop down to the site office several
       times as we have a ten year maintenance contract with them.
       Last night DH and I went out to a nightclub. At about 11 I went
       to the bathroom and came out of the cubicle to see Lisa standing
       in front of the sinks snorting a line of coke.
       My initial reaction was to slip away and pretend I hadn't seen
       her, but unfortunately Lisa looked up and caught my eye in the
       mirror. In an attempt to be casual I just said "Hi" and quickly
       left, but she looked very embarrassed to see me.
       To be clear, while it's not for me, I really don't care what
       recreational drugs people choose to do in their spare time. It
       is, however, illegal in the UK, so I can see why she might have
       felt awkward. My concern now is that if I have to go down to the
       office again, it's going to be difficult dealing with her.
       My thought is to just pretend I have no memory of the evening
       and carry on as normal rather than try to address it. Does that
       sound reasonable?
       #Post#: 37399--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: Hanna Date: August 24, 2019, 2:35 pm
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       Sheesh! Yes, I’d just pretend you didn’t see her at all next
       time you have to go down there.
       #Post#: 37400--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: sandisadie Date: August 24, 2019, 2:37 pm
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       If it were me, I would just get the mindset that what she was
       doing was nothing more then if you had seen her smoking in the
       restroom.  What she was doing actually has nothing to do with
       you, or her dealings with you.  She knew when she was doing her
       drugs in the restroom that someone might come in and see her so
       to her it is likely no big deal, and something she is used to
       doing in public.  Just interact with her as if you hadn't seen
       her there.  If she happens to say anything to you about it just
       say that it's none of your business, and then get on with your
       day.
       #Post#: 37410--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: jpcher Date: August 24, 2019, 7:56 pm
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       Throwing in my agreement with everybody else . . . pretend it
       never happened.
       If she mentions the incident I would play dumb "What are you
       talking about? I never saw you at Xclub."
       #Post#: 37423--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: shadowfox79 Date: August 25, 2019, 4:47 am
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       Fair enough. It may be a while before I have to go back there
       anyway so I should be able to play it convincingly.
       #Post#: 37459--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: Runningstar Date: August 25, 2019, 8:06 pm
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       Yikes, how awkward.  I don't care what people want to do for the
       most part.  Mind my own business...  except when I'm going to
       someone for a business purpose.  Then I expect a professional
       and that includes (or in this case excludes) illegal drugs done
       in a public place.  Is Lisa privy to private financial, personal
       information?  Does she hold legal licenses - such as a real
       estate agent, or as a contractor or the like?  Then, yes, I'd be
       very concerned.
       What would I do about it?  It would really depend on the answer
       to just what (if any) of my business Lisa was involved in.  If
       it was in any way significant, then I'd be considering how to
       end that professional relationship.
       #Post#: 37466--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: browzer11 Date: August 25, 2019, 11:02 pm
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       sandisadie ..."What she was doing actually has nothing to do
       with you, or her dealings with you.".
       That's ridiculous. Any person I deal with in any professional
       setting will be cut off by me instantly if I know they are a
       coke head.
       Why some of you are defending this is astounding.
       #Post#: 37468--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: LurkingGurl Date: August 26, 2019, 12:45 am
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       I gotta agree that it's not nothing.
       The builder rep has access to all sorts of personal information
       of every buyer in the neighborhood.  Not only that, but
       typically they spend their days in the model home which means
       they work in the neighborhood and they are bringing that habit
       and possibly some of its more dangerous elements into that
       community.
       That's not ok.
       But honestly, what would bother me more is her using out in the
       open like she was doing.  There is no reason why she couldn't go
       into a stall and take her hit.  Does she really think that no
       one she does business with goes out to a night club?
       It shows a serious lack of discretion on top of there also
       possibly being an addiction issue.
       But, I don't know what I would do about it.  I would worry about
       her going for revenge if the information was passed onto the
       builder.  But if I felt friendly enough with her, I would
       probably bring the subject up and outline my concerns.
       If you're going to do something illegal or illicit, it's up to
       you to conceal your illegal or illicit activity if you want to
       maintain connections with people who don't do illegal or illicit
       things.  I agree it's none of my business, whether it's drugs or
       an affair.  So don't make it my business.  Because when push
       comes to shove, I'm not going to put myself in jeopardy for
       someone else's bad decisions and bad discretion.
       #Post#: 37471--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: collakat Date: August 26, 2019, 6:20 am
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       This would make me very uncomfortable.  :o
       I think the etiquette issue would be if she brings it up, maybe
       to test if you are also into it or to validate her life choices.
       If you don't have ethical objections just say that it is not
       your scene but none of your business. If I was pushed for a
       comment, I would give it. But your decision? If she does not
       raise it, then it did not happen...
       #Post#: 37473--------------------------------------------------
       Re: Um... hi?
       By: Hanna Date: August 26, 2019, 6:51 am
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       [quote author=browzer11 link=topic=1297.msg37466#msg37466
       date=1566792177]
       sandisadie ..."What she was doing actually has nothing to do
       with you, or her dealings with you.".
       That's ridiculous. Any person I deal with in any professional
       setting will be cut off by me instantly if I know they are a
       coke head.
       Why some of you are defending this is astounding.
       [/quote]
       She can’t “cut her off”. She is an agent with whom the OP has
       business to conduct occasionally.
       She can report her to whomever is above her, possibly. (Not sure
       there is anyone above her.).
       She can be cold and snotty. She can say something directly to
       her.
       None of those things sound like good options to me.
       What would you do? Never speak to her again even if you needed
       to exercise your warranty?
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