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Bad Manners and Brimstone
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#Post#: 37183--------------------------------------------------
"welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIENDS"
DIR By: Andi_3k
Date: August 21, 2019, 9:07 pm
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BG: I don't use my legal name in real life, I use a variation of
a favorite aunt's very unique name, I have for more tha 30
years,so unless you were my family, the HR dept of an employer,
my doctor or a cradit company you'd not know my legal name, or
have reason to. I told the new employers this in my interview
and when they offered me the job- I told them my preferered name
and filled out all the forms for name tags, email address,ect to
be made with my prefered name
So I started the new job yesterday -- today after I got into my
email and some of the other systems - I found an email with my
legal name, prefered name and birthday that had been distributed
to every person in the company. Yeah I am pissed, however I am
sure there is nothing I can do to get my privacy back - my
question is hopw do i make them understand that this was
unacceptable, and how do I trust them again? How would you all
handle such an incident
#Post#: 37189--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: NyaChan
Date: August 21, 2019, 10:58 pm
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In my company, it wouldn’t be odd for this type of
information to be sent out to a new employee’s team or
even department. We don’t include date of birth, but we
do celebrate birthdays so it’s not some huge secret unless
someone were to preemptively request that their information not
be distributed. Even then, I’m not sure it is reasonable
to expect them to not tell people your name, especially since
they made a point of including what you prefer to be called so
it isn’t as if they are spreading misinformation.
Edited to add: I do think it is reasonable to have a preference
for more privacy, but I wouldn’t approach a conversation
with HR or whoever you talk to with the attitude that they did
something completely nuts or out of the ordinary because you
might seem a bit out of step with their norms. You might get a
better response if you present it as your own preference that
others might share also, so you are helpfully bringing it to
their attention.
#Post#: 37191--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: lakey
Date: August 21, 2019, 11:06 pm
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They may have needed to use your legal name in their databases
for social security, FICA, insurance, pension, or whatever. They
might have been concerned that having you also listed as the
name you normally use, could cause some problems. Just a
thought.
#Post#: 37194--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: LurkingGurl
Date: August 22, 2019, 1:03 am
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If you feel strongly enough, quit and find another job. I think
that was a serious breach of your trust.
Of course they need to know those things, but distributing
someone's personal information like that to thousands of people
is just dumb. All any of them need to know is the name that you
work by and your extension and what you do at the company.
They certainly don't need to know your birthday. It just seems
intrusive. And in this day and age with information being able
to be used and sold, I don't think it's something they should
have done.
#Post#: 37202--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: Hanna
Date: August 22, 2019, 4:39 am
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Is there a safety issue or is this just your personal
preference?
I understand your desire to keep it private and see no reason
that coworkers need this information. But am also amazed you
could really keep your name from coworkers and neighbors for
long. I go by a nickname but all of our HR systems show my legal
name. My coworkers can all see it on the online org chart,
expense filing system, etc.
So anywhere I’ve worked people would eventually see it. Before
online paystubs, payroll would drop off our paystubs and whoever
was there first would distribute and see it on the envelope. At
home eventually a piece of mail is mis-delivered and the
neighbors see it. I guess I just never felt I had a reasonable
expectation that people I’m around on a daily basis wouldn’t
find out my real name.
It’s also bit unusual that someone wants to hide their name and
they probably just didn’t think to notify whoever normally sends
these emails to amend the process for one person. I think tons
of people would be annoyed by their birthday being shared,
though.
What do you want to happen?
#Post#: 37207--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: Rose Red
Date: August 22, 2019, 7:07 am
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Is this a list (employee directory) or an email introducing you?
If it's a list, that just seems to be their format. Maybe you
can ask them to change it, but I don't think you can tell them
it was unacceptable because I personally don't think it is. You
told them your preferred name but it didn't sound like you told
them that your real name is a secret? I'm sure they have many
employees who say "My name is Christine. Call me Chris." A
preference is not a secret unless you tell them it's a secret.
#Post#: 37208--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: NyaChan
Date: August 22, 2019, 7:13 am
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??? what does the “Old” tag mean? Old fashioned?
#Post#: 37209--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: Bada
Date: August 22, 2019, 7:16 am
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I don't think it's intuitive that because you don't *use* your
legal name, that you also don't want anyone to *know* it. If HR
sent an email saying, we just hired Robert Smith, who goes by
Bob, I wouldn't blink an eye. I'm just not sure HR knew that you
would consider their actions a breach of privacy, so I would
approach it as giving them a new perspective and not bring up
the stuff about loss of trust at all. (I see Rose Red typed
something similar before I could hit post!)
I'm a little more torn about the birthday. I think it depends on
if they shared the year, not just the month and day. My exact
age is private, so I'd be annoyed if they shared the year. But
again, I wouldn't approach it as loss of trust, I'd educate them
on your perspective which tgey seem to have never heard. If you
also disagree about sharing the month/day, that seems like an
uncommon position and you may need to let them know some people
oppose that too (Jehovah's Witnesses who don't celebrate
birthdays come to mind. As a religious matter they pribavly
wouldn't like having that info shared.)
#Post#: 37210--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: kckgirl
Date: August 22, 2019, 7:42 am
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I think you're overreacting a bit. It's not unusual to welcome
Susan Hodges, who goes by Leah, and whose birthday is June 27th.
#Post#: 37212--------------------------------------------------
Re: "welcome abord -- WE'RE GIVING YOUR LEGAL NAME AND YOUR
BIRTHDATE TO 2,0000 OF YOUR NEWEST FRIEN
DIR By: Jem
Date: August 22, 2019, 8:04 am
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--- Quote from: kckgirl link ---
>
> I think you're overreacting a bit. It's not unusual to welcome
Susan Hodges, who goes by Leah, and whose birthday is June 27th.
>
--- End Quote ---
Agreed. Regarding the birth year, you can generally find how old
someone is using a simple google search, especially for people
with really any education. I have never understood why people
want to keep their age a secret. I grasp many people DO want to
keep it a secret, I just don’t understand WHY!
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