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Bad Manners and Brimstone
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#Post#: 29920--------------------------------------------------
Am I really invited?
By: bopper Date: April 26, 2019, 9:52 am
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So i got an invitation to a lunch gathering...most of the people
were from another team.
I am not sure if I am invited because they genuinely want me
there or they are reusing the invite list from the going away
lunch for one of my friends who was in that group previously.
Obviously I need to ask, but how to get the real answer rather
than "oh sure, we want you there" which may or may not be true?
#Post#: 29921--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: lowspark Date: April 26, 2019, 10:02 am
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I don't think there's a way. I mean, put yourself in their
place. If you had done the inviting and inadvertently invited
someone who was just a legacy from the previous event's list,
would you tell them? Probably not.
If I were you, I wouldn't worry about whether they meant to
invite you or not. You're invited and that's that. If you want
to go, then go and participate fully and enjoy the company. Go
under the assumption that they enjoyed having you as part of the
group so wanted to keep including you. Behave as if you belong
and that it's perfectly natural that you are there.
#Post#: 29929--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: Rose Red Date: April 26, 2019, 11:49 am
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Is there someone there that you are friends/friendly with? If
so, go and enjoy yourself.
You also said "most" are from one team so there must be invites
to several people outside their department so it doesn't sound
like a team meeting thing (no outsiders allowed).
#Post#: 29930--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: NyaChan Date: April 26, 2019, 11:50 am
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I’ve been in a similar situation and would say “hey, I noticed
that most of the attendees are from C Team. Happy to attend if
you’d like, but wanted to confirm first whether you meant to
include me in this”
#Post#: 29941--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: Victoria Date: April 26, 2019, 12:56 pm
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[quote author=NyaChan link=topic=1107.msg29930#msg29930
date=1556297436]
I’ve been in a similar situation and would say “hey, I noticed
that most of the attendees are from C Team. Happy to attend if
you’d like, but wanted to confirm first whether you meant to
include me in this”
[/quote]
I like this wording. I'd treat it as any other business meeting,
and people are added/removed from those by mistake all the time.
#Post#: 30129--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: bopper Date: April 29, 2019, 2:21 pm
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So I accepted the invite...and then the organizer said "FYI,
your friend Lee won't make it this time...but we will be having
these monthly." So I said "maybe I will skip this one and come
next time!"
#Post#: 30139--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: hovlane Date: April 29, 2019, 4:50 pm
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Who's Lee and don't you think it's rather rude to accept an
invitation and then retract it when your friend/coworker won't
be there? I obviously missed something.
#Post#: 30154--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: gramma dishes Date: April 29, 2019, 6:42 pm
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Were you being invited to take Lee's place? ???
#Post#: 30182--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: Victoria Date: April 30, 2019, 11:57 am
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The event may have been mailed out to the previous list without
the organizer looking at the attendees. But when bopper
accepted, the organizer likely got a notification that said
"bopper has accepted the invite."
I suspect that this is what happened and the organizer realized
that she hadn't meant to invite bopper, which prompted the "FYI,
your friend [the only reason you got invited to the first one]
won't be here" email.
#Post#: 30203--------------------------------------------------
Re: Am I really invited?
By: bopper Date: April 30, 2019, 3:58 pm
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I think I was added to this meeting invite list because I was on
the going away lunch invite for my friend Lee.
I am not super close to the other people, but I know them
because I am friends with Lee and have met them through her.
I think that I was invited as a way for me to see Lee when she
is seeing others for lunch at my company.
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