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                                                             on Gopher (inofficial)
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       COMMENT PAGE FOR:
  HTML   Japanese Death Poems
       
       
        HardwareLust wrote 5 hours 38 min ago:
        Yes, some of the translations are inexact, but what gets me is how many
        of these are still beautiful and even profound even after they are
        translated.
       
        layman51 wrote 23 hours 9 min ago:
        So this is where the Tenchu video game series gets its inspiration for
        some of its game over screens.
       
        jackdoe wrote 1 day ago:
        in contrast: death row inmate's last statements
        
  HTML  [1]: https://web.archive.org/web/20250221030618/https://www.tdcj.te...
       
          ge96 wrote 1 day ago:
          Wow, I wonder what I would say if I had no choice but to accept dying
          
          Maybe just one word F
          
          Makes me think of that infinite improbability drive scene 2005, these
          people reach the end of their maze, life path
       
        Rooster61 wrote 1 day ago:
        I feel the profound
        
        written word austerity;
        
        Death, captured in time
       
        evanjrowley wrote 1 day ago:
        If you enjoy longer poems, then you might like The Rag and Bone Shop of
        the Heart (1992).
        
  HTML  [1]: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/162343.The_Rag_and_Bone_Sh...
       
        stared wrote 1 day ago:
        In the topic of death poems, I consider "You Want It Darker" by Leonard
        Cohen a masterpiece. He was 83 with terminal cancer. Yet, this song
        captures both his wit & spirit at its height.
       
          locusofself wrote 1 day ago:
          such a good tune
       
        ThrowawayTestr wrote 1 day ago:
        "Death poems
        
        are mere delusion—
        
        death is death."
        
        Hardcore
       
        andyjohnson0 wrote 1 day ago:
        Don’t just stand there with your hair turning gray,
            soon enough the seas will sink your little island.
            So while there is still the illusion of time,
            set out for another shore.
            No sense packing a bag.
            You won’t be able to lift it into your boat.
            Give away all your collections.
            Take only new seeds and an old stick.
            Send out some prayers on the wind before you sail.
            Don’t be afraid.
            Someone knows you’re coming.
            An extra fish has been salted.
        
        by Mona (Sono) Santacroce (1928–1995)
        
        from The Five Invitations: Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About
        Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski
       
        tl2do wrote 1 day ago:
        As a native Japanese speaker, I'm happy to see our literature
        introduced to other countries. But I also feel conflicted.
        
        The original Japanese of the first poem is:
        
        おほけなき床の錦や散り紅葉
        
        The translation on the site:
        
        > I am not worthy
        > of this crimson carpet:
        > autumn maple leaves.
        
        This contains the translator's interpretation, and the sound and
        intonation are completely lost. I admire the translator's effort, but I
        want visitors to understand how much this differs from the original.
       
          hirvi74 wrote 20 min ago:
          As a native speaker, would there be any way that you could translate
          this back one poem back into Japanese? I am curious what the original
          would be, and if the translation was truly accurate. It was favorite
          one from the article:
          
          RAIZAN (来山)
          Died on the 3rd day of the 10th month, 1716 at the age of 63
          
          Farewell, sire—
          
          like snow, from water come
          
          to water gone.
       
          jerf wrote 1 day ago:
          Sound and intonation are never going to translate between Japanese
          and English. It's not even on the table.
          
          Such things can't even necessarily translate well between two
          languages as similar as French and English. Japanese and English is
          completely hopeless.
          
          It's true in the other direction too, though this being an English
          site it might be more easily neglected. I've seen some English songs
          translated into Japanese, keeping the same syllable count scheme. The
          Japanese is radically simplified compared to the English, with entire
          adverbs, adjectives, even clauses removed. And that's even before we
          ask whether Japanese necessarily has the correct words to translate
          some of the richer English concepts with their own centuries of
          history and connotation behind them that these songs contained.
          
          It is what it is. There isn't much that can be done about it. Even if
          someone made an exhaustive translation of something, it could never
          be repacked into something that matches the original concise packing.
       
          lo_zamoyski wrote 1 day ago:
          This is the general problem with literature and poetry especially.
          They're not entirely translatable.
          
          - Languages are part of culture and they are historically
          conditioned, making them necessarily bounded and finite [0]. While
          the essential thing signified may be the same for corresponding words
          in two languages (snow vs. Schnee), there is variance in semantic
          emphasis, connotation, and symbolic significance. In other words, the
          pragmatic aspect of language is highly contextual and conditioned.
          
          - Words can be used univocally, equivocally, or analogically, and
          there isn't necessarily a correspondence between these constellations
          across any two languages. But so much of wordplay trades on such
          constellations.
          
          - The syntactic and phonetic features peculiar to a language - apart
          from the what is signified per se - is heavily exploited by poetry.
          
          [0] This reminds me of words like the Greek λόγος (logos), which
          does not find a satisfactory counterpart in any language as far as I
          can tell. (Approximations are Tao, Ṛta, or Ma'at, for instance.)
          You see this difficulty in the translation of John 1 where it is
          usually rendered verbum or word, which have their own perfections,
          but fail to do justice to the richness of the original meaning of
          Logos in passages like John 1:1 and 1:3: "In the beginning was the
          Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. [...] All
          things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made
          that was made." When you substitute "Word" with "Logos", you can
          clearly see how much more pregnant that message is, e.g., that,
          contrary to the pagan mythology of those John was addressing, in the
          beginning there was order, not chaos; that God is Reason; that
          everything that exists is caused by God and therefore fundamentally
          intelligible. (Curiously, the Latin Verbum is better than the Greek
          at emphasizing the procession of divine Reason as Second Person from
          the First Person in the Trinity.)
       
            osullivj wrote 1 day ago:
            By "procession", do you allude to the filioque clause? Agreed on
            difficulty of translation as I follow Quine so think a language as
            a whole is the unit of meaning as opposed to any specific granular
            element.
       
              lo_zamoyski wrote 1 day ago:
              > By "procession", do you allude to the filioque clause?
              
              The filioque is about the procession of the Holy Spirit from the
              Father and the Son, not the Son from the Father.
       
          darkerside wrote 1 day ago:
          I feel like trying to replicate the meter in English is a silly
          constraint
          
          I would prefer to know how each line would be best interpreted if it
          weren't a haiku
       
            tl2do wrote 20 hours 30 min ago:
            I am not a literature lover. I found a modern language
            interpretation of the poem. Many interpretation are possible. But I
            feel this is relevant.
            I translated it to English.
            
            ============
            
            おほけなき床の錦や散り紅葉 "Ohokenaki toko no nishiki
            ya chiri momiji" is interpreted as a haiku-like expression of
            introspection and refined aesthetic sensibility — one in which
            the speaker, surrounded by undeserved honor (ohokenaki) and
            luxurious living (toko no nishiki = sumptuous furnishings), gazes
            upon the fleeting falling autumn leaves and reflects on their own
            vanity and attachment to life.
            
            Key points of interpretation:
            おほけなき Ohokenaki (身の程知らず /畏れ多い):
            Refers to a luxurious situation or standing that exceeds one's true
            worth or station — something almost presumptuous to possess.
            床の錦 Toko no nishiki: Literally, a beautifully brocaded floor
            covering; a symbol of opulence. By extension, it evokes the sight
            of vivid autumn leaves carpeting the ground — the splendor of
            autumn (nishiki-aki) likened to a gorgeous spread of fabric.
            散り紅葉 Chiri momiji : Falling, scattering autumn leaves — a
            classic symbol of impermanence and the Buddhist sense of transience
            (mujo).
            Overall picture: The speaker finds themselves in lavish
            surroundings that feel undeserved (ohokenaki), while the scattering
            leaves (mujo) adorn that world with a beauty that is at once
            gorgeous and hollow — a quiet contrast between humility and the
            ephemeral.
            
            Even amid a life of splendor, the sight of leaves falling reveals a
            universal truth — that all things must eventually end. The poem
            captures a mood that is gently melancholic yet elevated: savoring
            that beauty from a place of quiet, dignified acceptance.
       
        Noaidi wrote 1 day ago:
        Since time began
        
        the dead alone know peace.
        
        Life is but melting snow.
        
        ~~
        
        Having a mental illness and being homeless I sit with my life now and
        let it melt. I know death is coming so I just let it come. I tried to
        force death to come twice, but I found that suffering is really no
        different that joy.
        
        I live in a van right now so I am upper class homeless but soon I may
        be totally shelterless. Part of me is looking forward to it. Through
        the last ten years, moving from riches to rags, all my past
        attachments, all I can do is laugh at myself. There is such a weird
        liberation in inescapable suffering and I hope you all get to
        experience it someday.
       
        DaedalusII wrote 1 day ago:
        The sun sips the sky until it is drowning
        
        I am circling my prey
        
        If I am strong, the world will finally let us be
        
  HTML  [1]: https://pearlharbor.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/USS-Essex-C...
       
        pjc50 wrote 1 day ago:
        I only know a tiny corner of the language, but for things like this I
        really wish they'd cite the original Japanese. Precisely because the
        haiku is a constrained form, it is also an opportunity for ambiguity,
        double-meaning, and cases where a word may be translated with the same
        semantics but different connotations.
        
        By comparison, the gold standard for dealing with non-English poetry in
        English: [1] You have (1) the original Greek, (2) word-by-word lookup,
        (3) translation notes, and (4) multiple translations.
        
  HTML  [1]: https://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/text?doc=Perseus:text:199...
       
          tl2do wrote 1 day ago:
          I am a native Japanese
          
          Original Kanji - hiragana works:
          おほけなき床の錦や散り紅葉
          
          How it sounds:
          Oh ke naki
          Yukano nishikiya
          chiri ko yo
       
            mncharity wrote 16 hours 35 min ago:
            >> I really wish they'd cite the original Japanese.
            
            Given the Japanese above, translate.google can do text to
            speech[1], and goog AIMode[3] and bing/chat[2][4] can give multiple
            translations with notes.
            
            But finding that Japanese, given only the TFA's description? I only
            saw AIMode manage that, not vanilla search. Perhaps using the
            author's Japanese wikipedia page[5], or perhaps here, or? [1] [2]
            [3] [4] [4] [5]
            
  HTML      [1]: https://translate.google.com/?sl=auto&tl=en&text=%E3%81%8A...
  HTML      [2]: https://copilot.microsoft.com/shares/JcJSRgDDvT84M16x7RJDb
  HTML      [3]: https://share.google/aimode/FNEXZGRPFPANlvNwd
  HTML      [4]: https://copilot.microsoft.com/shares/wjaWnGHNpGs18X4M6CJV6
  HTML      [5]: https://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E8%99%9A%E7%99%BD
       
            buntsai wrote 1 day ago:
            In which case the "crimson carpet" appears to be the loose
            invention of the translator. The original just says "brocade" or I
            guess, "quilt", implying some sort of silk bed cover?
       
              tl2do wrote 20 hours 41 min ago:
              Try an image search with 紅葉 落葉. The result will be the
              typical image a Japanese person imagines when hearing 散りç´
              葉. Then try the same search with "crimson carpet." From the
              standpoint of literary and artistic sensibility, the difference
              is not small.
       
                nekooooo wrote 19 hours 17 min ago:
                my imagination when reading 散り紅葉 is an enka song lol
       
                  tl2do wrote 15 hours 35 min ago:
                  You hit the point. Image from enka will be nearly identical
                  to ones from poem.
       
            darkerside wrote 1 day ago:
            Oh ho ke na ki?
       
              tl2do wrote 20 hours 37 min ago:
              It is modern Japanese pronunciation. In classical literature,
              おほ is pronounced as a prolonged "o" (an elongated /oː/
              sound).
       
                HK-NC wrote 20 hours 11 min ago:
                Does that apply to longer vowels with the same(ish) sound, as
                in 因果応報?
       
                  tl2do wrote 18 hours 54 min ago:
                  Yes, and no.
                  å ± . this is contemporary  word. it pronounces "ho-o", not
                  "ho", not "o-o", not "o". Someone read "bo-o".
       
          buntsai wrote 1 day ago:
          Agree 10,000 fold.
          English and Japanese are so different and have such different
          standards of aesthetics and literary form that good translations are
          like independent creations inspired by the original.
          I would like to know that the original form was.
          Even a word by word ungrammatical transliteration would be helpful.
          But not to have the Japanese available means I cannot even look it
          up...
       
        pndy wrote 1 day ago:
        This is surely epitaph equivalent from that part of the world
        
  HTML  [1]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epitaph?useskin=vector
       
        pelasaco wrote 1 day ago:
        "A last fart:
        are these the leaves
        of my dream, vainly falling?
        
        In the original, the image of a dream is combined with the cruder image
        of passing wind.."
        
        Is the wind representing the fart here?
       
          pjc50 wrote 1 day ago:
          "Passing wind" is an English euphemism, the original does not use
          "kaze" (wind) but goes straight for "he" (fart).
          
          The original word order also puts the dream at the start and drops
          fart right at the end, which I think is funnier than putting it on
          the first line.
       
            Rooster61 wrote 1 day ago:
            I particularly loved this one. I interpreted it as a man indulging
            in one last ephemeral vanity. A literal last fart in the whirlwind
            of life used as a metaphor to illustrate how useless mankind's
            boasts are next to the inevitability and finality of death
       
          shawn_w wrote 1 day ago:
          Passing wind is another term (among many others) for farting.
       
        seletskiy wrote 1 day ago:
        Now that my storehouse
          has burned down, nothing
          conceals the moon.
        
        This piece instantly reminded me of Ashes and Snow movie, where one of
        the poems has very similar opening (followed, in my opinion, by even
        more beautiful piece, which you can easily find if interested):
        
          Ever since my house burnt down,
          I see the moon more clearly
        
        I wonder whether or not this is just a coincidence.
       
          the_sleaze_ wrote 23 hours 47 min ago:
          "when my house burned down, I gained an unobstructed view of the sky"
          
          A different translation of the same
       
          aanet wrote 1 day ago:
          I was reminded of the writer Pico Iyer's beautiful writing in Aflame:
          Learning from Silence of exactly this sentiment, after his house
          burned down [1] `My house burnt down
          
          I can now see better
          
          The rising moon`
          
  HTML    [1]: https://www.mariashriversundaypaper.com/pico-iyers-fire-grie...
       
        block_dagger wrote 1 day ago:
        Death is apparently snowy
       
          DaedalusII wrote 1 day ago:
          spirits travel to rest in the mountains after death. the mountain is
          a place between life and death. there is much association between
          mountains and death. then by extension snow
       
          lukan wrote 1 day ago:
          I don't know whether there is a specific japanese cultural
          explanation, but in general it often was. In winter when it was cold,
          those who lacked the strength to go on, layed down in the snow to
          rest forever.
       
            retrac wrote 1 day ago:
            Everything dies in winter.  And then is reborn.  Everyone who lives
            in a cold climate knows deep in their bones that cold and winter
            are death.
            
            Though if we're going to get stereotypical about national
            characteristics (a dangerous game) then what might be more
            specifically Japanese is the particularly heightened understanding
            of this cycle.    Or at least, its expression in art, when in the
            west we might flinch away.
            
            I'm currently reading Spring Snow, so probably some of Yukio
            Mishima is drifting into my thoughts here.  (Explaining puns ruins
            them but there it is again: Yuki o.  Snow.)
       
              lemonberry wrote 17 hours 12 min ago:
              Not to mention the stillness and silence of new fallen snow.
              Probably the closest in life we come to the stillness and silence
              of death.
       
            gcanyon wrote 1 day ago:
            I don't remember who said it, but a statement that has stuck with
            me is:
            
            The moment when the most you can do is less than the least you need
            to do, you die.
       
       
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