**You Know You're Addicted To The Net
When...**

  1. Tech Support calls YOU for help.
  2. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say LOL.
  3. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.
  4. You keep begging your friends to get an account so "we can hang out".
  5. Your friends sign on to find you because they know if they call the phone will ring and ring (or the line is busy).
  6. Three words...carpal tunnel synndrome
  7. You want to meet a girl/guy and your first impulse is to turn on your computer
  8. You have to get a second phone line just so you can call Domino's
  9. You go into labour and you stop to type a special email letting everyone know you are going to be away
  10. You have a vanity car tag with your nick on it
  11. You no longer type with proper punctuation, capitalization, or complete sentences
  12. You begin to say "heh heh heh" instead of laughing
  13. You just HAVE to check your mail one last time before you go to bed, even though you were on only five minutes ago
  14. You turn down the lights and close the blinds so people won't know you are on-line again
  15. You know more about your net friends' daily routines than you do your own spouse's
  16. You find yourself lying to others about your time on-line and, when they complain that your phone was busy, you claim it was off the hook
  17. You would rather tell people your bloodshot eyes are from partying too much instead of the truth *all night on-line*)
  18. Your kids are standing at your side saying "mommy please come cook dinner" and you would rather type another "LOL"
  19. You marry your cyberboyfriend and you both sit at your own computers and chat to each other every night from across the room
  20. You type messages to people while you are on the phone with them at the same time
  21. Your dog leaves you
  22. You have to ask what year it is
  23. You write a letter like this..."dear tim, hiyas! how r u doin well i gotta go bbl!"
  24. You name your pets after people you talk to
  25. You smile sideways
  26. You have a map on the wall with red thumbtacks to mark where people you have met are
  27. You look at an annoying person off-line and wish you had your ignore button handy
  28. You bring a bag lunch and a cooler to the puter
  29. You go through withdrawal if you are away from the computer for more than a few hours
  30. You wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get on-line before you have your first cup of coffee
  31. You have to inject no-doze into your butt to keep it awake
  32. You wait 6 hours online for a certain "special person" to come home from work
  33. You don't know where the time has gone
  34. You end sentences with three (or more) periods while writing letters in pen/pencil
  35. Your relationship online has gone farther than any real one you have had
  36. You get up at 2am to go to the bathroom but go turn on your computer instead
  37. You spell things outloud instead of actually saying the word
  38. You don't even notice anymore when someone has a typo
  39. When you enter an IRC channel and 23 people greet you with {{{Hugs}}}
  40. You stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno, and lemme
  41. Your voicemail/answering maching message is BRB
  42. You type faster than you think
  43. You got your psychiatrist addicted to the net
  44. You want to be buried with your computer when it dies...or vice versa
  45. You actually enjoy the fact that you're addicted
  46. You can actually read and follow all the names of the cast that scrolls up your tv-screen at the end of a movie
  47. You dream in text
  48. Being called a newbie is a *MAJOR* insult
  49. You double click your tv remote
  50. You can now type over 70 wpm
  51. You are on the phone for a minute and need to do something else you say "BRB"
  52. You check your email and forget you have real mail aka snail mail
  53. You set your kitchen on fire while cooking dinner because you wanted to "check your mail" and, while you were there, you "just wanted to see who's on"