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The evidence suggests that most people summon strengths that surpass their own expectations. [119]Subscribe [120]Issue Archive Back Today News * + [121]Cortisol Signaling Affects Memories of Psychological Trauma + [122]Is There Such a Thing as an Honest Mistake? + [123]What If Certain Mental Disorders Are Not Disorders At All? + [124]Revisiting the Obama Effect * Essential Reads + The Psychology of the Pumpkin Spice Latte + How to Become More Humble + Kids Continued to Cope Well Two Months After Schools Closed + A Snapshot of Life in a 19th-Century Insane Asylum * Trending Topics + [125]COVID-19 + [126]Narcissism + [127]Alzheimer's + [128]Bias + [129]Affective Forecasting + [130]Neuroscience + [131]See All ____________________ (Search) Go checkmark icon Verified by Psychology Today [132]Peter Gray Ph.D. [133]Freedom to Learn Kids Continued to Cope Well Two Months After Schools Closed Two large surveys, a month apart, revealed family benefits of school closures. Posted Aug 18, 2020 * Facebook icon SHARE * Twitter icon TWEET * Envelope icon EMAIL * [134][icon-share-chat-md.svg] 7COMMENTS Image by Francis Ackson Soko on Wikimedia Commons Source: Image by Francis Ackson Soko on Wikimedia Commons Two weeks ago, I published an [135]article summarizing the results of a survey of 800 parents and 800 children (ages 8 through 13) that was conducted in April of 2020, approximately a month after most schools had closed because of the pandemic. I noted that a second survey, of another 800 parents and 800 children, was conducted a month later, in May, using the same methodology. Both survey samples were demographically representative of the U.S. population, across geographic area, [136]gender of the child, race, and family income. (For more about the method, see the previous post.) Since then I have had a chance to look more closely at the May results and compare them with April’s. My overall conclusion is that little changed. Children and parents appeared to be doing at least as well in May as they were in April. Here I will present the comparative data on those questions that are most relevant to the conclusions presented in the [137]previous post. Further discussion of each conclusion can be found in that post. Conclusion 1: Overall, children’s psychological wellbeing seemed to improve after school closure. Specific findings supporting this conclusion include the following: • In April, 49 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I have been more calm than I was in regular school,” and only 25 percent disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the percentages were 51 percent agreed and 25 percent disagreed. • In April, 43 percent percent of the parents agreed with the statement, “My child is less [138]stressed now than before school closed,” and 29 percent disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the percentages were 39 percent and 32 percent. • In April, 85 percent of parents described their child as Happy during the previous week (rating of 6 or above on a 10-point scale). In May, that was 90 percent. • On a list of adjectives to describe themselves over the past week, in April, 62 percent of children checked Happy, 20 percent checked Sad, and 10 percent checked Angry. In May, the percentages were 60 percent Happy, 17 percent Sad; and 12 percent Angry. Conclusion 2: Children appeared to gain a greater sense of independence and personal responsibility after school closure. Specific findings supporting this conclusion include: • In April, 71 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I have been finding new things to pass the time” and 13 percent disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the percentages were 74 percent agreed and 12 percent disagreed. • In April, 71 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “My parents have been letting me do more things on my own,” and 10 percent disagreed. In May, the percentages were 72 percent agreed and 8 percent disagreed. • In April, 63 percent percent of parents indicated that their child had developed new interests or skills over the past week, 86 percent that their child had been fully immersed in some activity they enjoy, 78 percent that their child had helped with chores around the house, and 67 percent that their child willingly undertook activities that were new and/or a stretch for the child. (In each case agreement was a rating of 6 or above on the 10-point scale). In May, these percentages were 67 percent, 82 percent, 78 percent, and 70 percent, respectively. Conclusion 3: Parents gained a heightened appreciation of their children’s capabilities. Specific findings supporting this conclusion include: • In April, on the checklist addressing “How does seeing how your child is coping with this period make you feel?”, 49 percent checked Proud, 45 percent checked [139]Grateful, and 45 percent checked Impressed.” In contrast, only 8 percent checked Annoyed and 6 percent Disappointed. In May, these percentages were 63 percent Proud, 53 percent Grateful, 48 percent Impressed, 6 percent Annoyed, and 4 percent Disappointed. So, in May parents were even prouder of their children than they had been in April. • In April, 73 percent agreed with the statement, “I am gaining a new appreciation of my child’s capabilities” and only 5 percent disagreed. In May 58 percent agreed and 12 percent disagreed. (Perhaps the decline here, in May, is because they had already gained that appreciation the previous month, so in May it wasn’t so much a “new appreciation.”) Conclusion 4: Contrary to what many might expect, parenting for this sample was not notably more difficult than parenting when children were in school. Specific findings supporting this conclusion include: • In April, 73 percent percent of parents disagreed with the statement, “During the past week my child and I are having more conflicts” (indicated by a rating of 5 or below on the 10-point scale). In May, that was 82 percent. This is perhaps the most interesting finding of all. With school closures, conflicts between children and parents diminished, and they continued to diminish even more over time after schools closed. • In April, 47 percent of parents disagreed with the statement “Pandemic [140]parenting is easier than parenting during normal times,” 24 percent agreed with it. (The rest were neutral). In May, 42 percent disagreed and 27 percent agreed. In other words, in both samples fewer than half of the parents reported parenting to be more difficult during the pandemic than before. Conclusion 5: Regardless of everything else, most children were looking forward to going back to school—because they missed their friends. • In April, 70 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I have been looking forward to going back to school,” 18 percent disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, 73 percent agreed and 15 percent disagreed. One of the open-ended questions invited children to write about what they missed most about regular school. Of the 206 who responded to that question in April, 82 percent said they missed seeing their friends; 13 percent said they missed one or more of their teachers; 7 percent missed recess or sports; 3 percent missed music or art; 3 percent mentioned some other type of class they missed or said they missed classes in general; 2 percent said they missed nothing at all; and 1.5 percent said they missed lunch. I don’t yet have the list of kids’ responses to this question in May, but I have no reason to think it would be much different. Overall Conclusion As I said in the first post of this two-part series, I have no doubt that the pandemic has had devastating effects for some families. But these two surveys indicate—contrary to many reports that are not based on systematic studies—that the closing of schools and other adult-organized activities for children, overall, benefitted more children than it harmed. As I have pointed out in many previous posts and academic articles, and in my book Free to Learn, prior to the pandemic we were keeping children so busy, and so stressed, with schooling and other adult-run activities that they had little opportunity to do what children are designed, biologically, to do—to play, explore, take initiative, discover and pursue their own interests, and learn through these self-directed ways. I hope that we, as a society, can derive a lesson from this. Let’s realize that the “normal” that people talk about when they talk about getting back to something like what we had before the pandemic for schooling is not “normal” biologically. We have, over decades, gradually turned children’s lives into something that is not at all normal for children. Normal means time to get bored, daydream, play, discover, find and pursue your passions, and, yes, help out at home. It is no surprise to me that the primary loss to children from school closures was loss of opportunity to see their friends. Beyond what I just listed, "normal" for children means having lots of time with friends. Children were already deprived of that before the pandemic, and even more so afterwards. *** What are your thoughts and questions about all this? Do the findings of this survey coincide, or not, with your observations concerning your own children or other children you know? This blog is, among other things, a forum for discussion. Your views and questions are treated with respect by me and other readers. But please present them here in the comments section (by clicking on the little comment balloon below), not to me by email. By presenting them here, you help enlighten others, not just me, and you give many people the chance to respond to your questions. (And, I get way too many emails.) * Facebook icon SHARE * Twitter icon TWEET * Envelope icon EMAIL * 7COMMENTS [141]CADO (Confined Animal Distracting Operations) Submitted by Anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 9:46am If, when momentarily free of schools distractiveness, a young person were to "bump into" a worthy passion, through which they found inner satisfaction vs. the systems external motivational bribes and through the net found others pursuing a similar passion, might this opportunity of sharing common concerns and goals, provide them a deeper connection with life, than if their team wins the super something ? * [142]Reply to Anonymous * [143]Quote Anonymous [144]If this is true, most teachers are functionally useless Submitted by anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 11:49am With remote learning, you only need the best teachers and education will flow to the best in a Zipfian distribution. All the lemons will be squeezed. It's going to be even worse news for college profs. The good but not the best teachers will function as study aides, not lecturers. * [145]Reply to anonymous * [146]Quote anonymous [147]more understanding of each other Submitted by Kelly on August 18, 2020 - 12:35pm My son had never been happy at school, although he got along well with the children there, he despised the teachers and the inflexibility of the whole thing. He told me that even though he liked seeing his friends there, he didn't miss school, and he'd rather never go back. Rather than have him do virtual school that would take 8:30-3:00 every day, we decided to homeschool for this year. What I didn't realize before was how stressed and trapped I, as a parent, felt when we were part of the school system. I dreaded squabbling over homework with my son and getting complaints from his teachers, and it definitely affected my relationship with him. With my son and I both feeling so much more relaxed now, he is growing and learning in new ways and we are getting along better than ever. I thought I would feel more restricted doing homeschooling but instead I feel such a sense of freedom and my son seems like a different kid entirely. He just wanted to be listened to, to have his feelings considered, to have time to do what he wants and explore his interests. I have no idea why I didn't think of it that way before. * [148]Reply to Kelly * [149]Quote Kelly [150]is it only friends, or is school important to them Submitted by K on August 18, 2020 - 12:45pm I wonder if schools had closed for some reason that didn't prohibit social interaction, whether the kids still would have said they wanted to go back to school. Many kids have been pretty isolated during this time and are probably thinking at least at school they could see their friends. If they had been able to see their friends all along, would they still have wanted to go back to school? It's possible, I think, because many kids have been convinced that school is very important and necessary and that if you don't go there you'll wind up stupid and poor later in life. * [151]Reply to K * [152]Quote K [153]Understanding Submitted by Dick Gallien on August 18, 2020 - 1:25pm Beautiful Kelly. John Holt, the most insightful person on how kids grow, concluded after his first 2 of 10 books on schooling, that schools aren't going to change, weren't meant to change and education isn't their purpose. He also realized that parents as sensitive as you, are more apt to trust your son, to "bump into" things that he is excited about and become self directed. I hated school, but when 15 I "bumped into" a small farm, bought the adjoining farm 64 yrs. ago, with a wife and 2 kids and am still passionate about turning all of Winona, Mn. "waste wood" into mostly biochar and some lumber on this farm. The answers I'm after aren't found in schools, especially forestry schools. Life is interesting---schools aren't. * [154]Reply to Dick Gallien * [155]Quote Dick Gallien [156]I would say that your Submitted by anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 9:40pm I would say that your experience is not universal. I loved school - especially classes that were not just memorization drills (like some of my early math classes). In high school and college, I took the most difficult classes I could handle in every area because I was curious and didn't yet know what I wanted to do. I ended up becoming a scientist, but because I had a love of literature and first learned to do rigorous analysis of literature, I look at things a little differently than most scientists, which has often helped me see solutions that aren't apparent to others. In my career, I have to learn constantly, since research is on the frontier of human knowledge. What I completely agree with the article on is the need for time to think and experiment as part of childhood and life. I hope the pandemic experience will bring a realization that humans are not made to be efficient and that the lack of efficiency (or increased free time) is of far greater benefit to individuals and society than trying to pack more and more into childhood and life. * [157]Reply to anonymous * [158]Quote anonymous [159]Tchrs. are useless, except as a distraction and guards. Submitted by Dick Gallien on August 18, 2020 - 9:38pm When someone's employment is dependent on "watching after" someone elses kids, confinement is the easiest, safest method.As kids move into our democratic-compulsory school system, taken from the German-Prussians as the most efficient system for controlling the masses, the same system that allowed an Austrian sch. drop out to lead the well schooled German's into WW 2; the same system that allowed the well schooled U.S. citizens to elect "it", it takes an indoctrination far beyond any religion that most of us have experienced, to believe that as certified teacher-guards, the piece of life that they teach their prisoners about, has any impact on their lives other than a distraction as they go deeper in debt, for a piece of paper. This is my signature line. Prison bars do the confining, allowing the prisoner a mental freedom not possible in schools, where an endless barrage of assignments, lectures, questions and tests, serve the same purpose, under the guise of education, while distracting as efficiently as the cracking of whips, keeping the imprisoned from discovering and pursuing their passions, or noticing that there are no real bars------and by the time they might realize the purpose of their confinement, it is too late. Curiosity is the cure for boredom. School is the cure for curiosity. * [160]Reply to Dick Gallien * [161]Quote Dick Gallien Post Comment Your name ______________________________ E-mail The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly. ______________________________ Subject ____________________________________________________________ Comment * ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________ [X] Notify me when new comments are posted (*) All comments ( ) Replies to my comment Leave this field blank ____________________ Post advertisement About the Author Peter Gray, Ph.D., is a research professor at Boston College, author of Free to Learn and the textbook Psychology (now in 8th edition), and founding member of the nonprofit Let Grow. 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